You want daft facts about climbing walls in the UK?

...OK, but only because you asked nicely...

Worst Hand At Scrabble award for Fewest Vowels in the address: Dyffryn Conwy Leisure Centre, Nebo Rd, Llanrwst, Gwynedd. Find it? We can't even pronounce it.
It'll Never Catch On award for Oldest wall: Leeds University's DR wall, built 1964. Followed by Exeter (1967). Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday toooo yooooouuu.....
Just This Once award for the Most Expensive access: Barmouth, in Wales - Ł7.75 for one wall hour (and even then the wall's only in a poxy leisure centre).
We Bought The Ruler Specially award for the Smallest measured wall: Archbishop Beck School, Liverpool, boasting 24 sq m. (Next smallest: Lewes Leisure Centre - 28 sq m.)
Can You Show Me Back To The Belay? award for Biggest wall: by a long neck to the Welsh International Climbing Centre only, ahem, 30 minutes' drive from Cardiff, with 1,800+ square metres of wall - pipping both Hadrian's Wall in Falkirk (the former winner with 1500+ sq m) and the Rock Face in Birmingham with 1500 sq m.
Can You Hear Me? award for Highest wall: No doubt about it - the Rock Face's 20m lead walls.
Sit Start Obligatory award for Lowest wall: Dingwall Leisure Centre's 10m traverse-only wall. Though the Fire College in Moreton-in-Marsh could mount a challenge.
Value Is Our Middle Name award for Best value: the Welsh ICC again, costing less than 0.27 pence per square metre, as you pay Ł5 to gaze at 1,800 sq m. It beats (again) the Rock Face and Hadrian's Wall, whose Ł4.50 peak entry fee means you're paying 0.3 pence per square metre.
Harrods award for Worst value for money - Lewes again. The entry fee of Ł2.35 means you1re paying 8.4 pence per square metre - 30 times more than the WICC. But can you afford to drive to Cardiff?
I'm Excited! award for Best Stress Indicator: ace reviewer Vicki Stott's (as was; now Portman) repeated use of the Shift key while pressing 1. (Try it and see.) Also her repeated use of the Shift key while, presumably, she types one-fingered with the other hand in discussing walls' tolerance to smokers (and ex-smokers).
Trouble Ahead? notice: as of March '99, in a dramatic reversal of the previous form, reviewers prefer relative newcomer The Edge to old-timer The Foundry in Sheffield. Will the oldie survive? What can it do? Could this turn into a soap opera on an unwatched digital TV channel?
Do You Know Where You're Going To award for Most Confusing Change of Address: Fort William's move from Highland to Invernesshire (according to the BMC book). Where is this place really? Is continental drift rearranging Scotland in real time?
Is That Really What You Meant? award for Language that may reveal more than intended: Rob Milne's comment about Dunfermline wall - "Not really a place for using ropes or children."
Could I Have Some Boots Instead award: Port Talbot YMCA's creche.
"Brevity is" award: Richard Martin's review of St Columb's Leisure Centre wall in Londonderry. It consists of two words, one of which is "wall".

If you want more daft facts, you'll have to unearth them yourself. Or email them to the Database editor.