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Tabloid headline writing competition

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Anonymous 11 Sep 2007
OK so following the reports about the wishes of local HM UK Forces commanders desire to withdraw from Basra in April giving rise to the risible 'British Blood spares Bush's Blushes' (c) Sloper the usual prize is on offer for the best Tabloid headline about a news story for the preceeding 7 days.

As a sake of illustration I doubt something like 'McCanns fly home as files sent in' would make the grade, although it is of course down to the judges.

But 'Barking! Bench fine fido for breaking barking ban' would be in with a shout.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/bristol/6989475.stm

Usual rules, no proles or Irish.
 Glyn Jones 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous: Fat Cats decide obseity threatens future of NHS
 Glyn Jones 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous: a poor start but it's late
 Blue Straggler 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous:

I keep clicking on really horrible news stories now. I hate you! A suicidal man took his 2-year-old son out to sea in a toy inflatable dinghy meant only for ponds, both died. A woman was set on fire in a layby and died in hospital.

Where are the little stories we can laugh at? The BBC seems to be full of nasty ones.
 Richard Carter 11 Sep 2007
whenever anyone mentions headlines I'm always reminded of the greatest newspaper headline ever written.

"Donkey robs bank!"

god bless the daily sport :-P
KevinD 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous:

is cheating allowed?

http://www.qwghlm.co.uk/toys/dailymail/
 Glyn Jones 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous: The Chronicles of Roddick
 Glyn Jones 11 Sep 2007
 Glyn Jones 11 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous:

Queer as folk - not nicked?
OP Anonymous 12 Sep 2007
In reply to Glyn Jones: The title was 'tabloid headline writing comp' not cut and paste for morons.

I will poor a pint of stella and a gold fish donw your pants if you carry on.
 hutchm 12 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4607642.stm

Don't jog your mammaries
bergalia 12 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous:

Great friend of mine - Frank Peters (finest chief sub ever on the Northern Echo) put up a couple or three in his day. US plans send first Afro-

American into space one summer 'Moon Coon in June' (it was disallowed.)

Announcement that tennis star (of her day) Anne Jones was pregant: 'Anne Jones Seeded.'

Huddersfield electricity company found it lacked skilled labour:
'Too few hands to make lights work...'

among the many.
 hutchm 12 Sep 2007
In reply to bergalia:

Sounds like a fairly typical sub of the day. Did he smoke a lot, often 'go missing' in the afternoon, and enjoy bullying the juniors?
 Glyn Jones 12 Sep 2007
In reply to Anonymous: I'm disheartened - 'PM puts pussy in place' certainly wasn't cut and paste.

:~P
bergalia 12 Sep 2007
In reply to hutchm:
> (In reply to bergalia)
>
> Sounds like a fairly typical sub of the day.

Errr no. The Northern Echo is a daily newspaper - subs hours 6pm - 3am; Smoked no more than the rest of the table. Never bullied - but didn't suffer sloppy copy. Great man - many of today's 'broadsheet' journalists owe their success to his guidance.
 hutchm 12 Sep 2007
In reply to bergalia:

It's just all my old bearded, alky subs used to sit around calling black people 'coons' as well, so I guess it sounded familiar.

It's a shame the NE has gone down the pan in recent years.

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