/ "'I shop at Waitrose because..."

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Cú Chullain - on 20 Sep 2012
this made be laugh this morning!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2012/sep/19/waitrose-twitter-hashtag

Supermarket was asking for trouble when it challenged tweeters to finish the sentence 'I shop at Waitrose because...'


some examples -

"I also shop at Waitrose because I was once in the Holloway Road branch and heard a dad say 'Put the papaya down, Orlando!'

"I shop at Waitrose because it makes me feel important and I absolutely detest being surrounded by poor people"

"I shop at Waitrose because the toilet paper is made from 24ct gold thread. (Unless it's the Essentials range)"


owlart - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I shop at Waitrose because it's on my way home from work and I'm too idle to walk the extra mile to the next supermarket (Morrisons).
Neil Williams - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to owlart:

I shop at Waitrose because it's convenient to MK centre. When it moves away to Oakgrove, I won't shop at Waitrose any more.

Neil
Chris the Tall - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
I shop at Waitrose because I might bump into Jess Ennis there
birdie num num - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
I shoplift in Waitrose because the fillet steak is so fresh and tender.
gribble - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at Waitrose as it is the most child unfriendly supermarket and I like to let my exuberant 5 year old run free thereby creating lemon sucking faces on cutomers and staff.
nickyrannoch on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

WTF is a waitrose?

Am i poor?
Cú Chullain - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to nickyrannoch:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
>
> WTF is a waitrose?
>
> Am i poor?

Yes.

Now feck off back to Morrisons will ya.

Clarence - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at waitrose to get a good few carrier bags so that I can shop at Morrisons next time and not have to hide my groceries from the neighbours.
Wonko The Sane - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
>>

>
> "I shop at Waitrose because it makes me feel important and I absolutely detest being surrounded by poor people"
>


<Like>
Horse on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
>
>
> "I shop at Waitrose because it makes me feel important and I absolutely detest being surrounded by poor people"
>
That was Sloper wasn't it.
Liam M - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: They stock Cartmel Sticky Toffee Apple Crumble. What more reason is needed!
pebbles - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: my favourite is "I shop at Waitrose because I got a lifetime ban from M&S after doing something obscene to a Percy Pig. #waitrosereasons"
Mike Stretford - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
>
> Supermarket was asking for trouble when it challenged tweeters to finish the sentence 'I shop at Waitrose because...'
>
>


I dunno... this is what they mean by going 'viral'.
Carolyn - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I don't shop at Waitrose because there isn't one for miles.
subalpine - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: i don't shop at waitrose because even their reduced items are a rip off..
dunc56 - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: "'I shop at Waitrose because..."
Their inclusive employment policy means all the cashier staff are fit young middle class girls.
Bjartur i Sumarhus on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to dunc56: The one near me has an amazing wine section, with a cellar, and a wine bar...it's brilliant. I spend quite a lot of lunchtimes there.

Jim Lancs - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Carolyn: "I don't shop at Waitrose because there isn't one for miles."

Don't you have a Booths near you ? - they share purchasing and distribution. Rumour has it that Edwin Booth will sell Booths to them when he retires.
digby - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at Waitrose because their own brand coffee beans are remarkably good, and not expensive.

But that's absolutely the only thing I buy there.
subalpine - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Jim Lancs: I shop at Booths for their cheap quality beers
LastBoyScout on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

...they have staff that are actually helpful and polite
...I can annoy my friend, that works there
...it's handy for odd things I forgot to get at Sainsbury's

Funniest thing I ever saw in Waitrose was a guy, who had been to Robert Dyas over the road, drop a tin of eggshell blue gloss paint on the floor of the produce section - he looked pretty red and the staff hadn't a clue what to do about it :-D
owlart - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I did once point out a large mistake in a glass sign at a brand new Waitrose. The manager's response was "Waitrose don't make mistakes"!
deepsoup - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to owlart:
> The manager's response was "Waitrose don't make mistakes"!

Indeed: http://i.imgur.com/LH70J.jpg
FrankBooth - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
I once asked a staff member if she could pont me to her chicken breasts
incog - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: The best one I heard (on the radio I think) was ...because they say ten items or fewer, not less!
Indy - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to subalpine:

Know what you mean.... I've bought reduced bread in there at the end of the day it wasn't that much cheaper than the fresh stuff at the local Tesco and it was so stale that you could you could have cracked your teeth on it. Thats happened a couple of times.... I've learnt my lesson now!
Carolyn - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Jim Lancs:

> Don't you have a Booths near you ? - they share purchasing and distribution. Rumour has it that Edwin Booth will sell Booths to them when he retires.

Close-ish, and yes, I'd heard they now shared distribution chain. Be interesting to see if they change the name if Waitrose buy, or if Booths is seen as a better front (Tesco's bought a number of high street newsagents locally, but kept the original local branding rather than switch to Tesco Extra as expected)

Bulls Crack - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at Waitrose because it tends to be better than other supermarkets....simple really.
krikoman - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

"I shop at Waitrose because it I'm a pretentious tw@"


andyathome - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
The late Alan Coren came out with a classic on 'News Quiz' once;

'The function of Sainsbury's is to keep the riff-raff out of Waitrose'.
Philip on 20 Sep 2012
I can't see why you'd shop at Waitrose when Ocado will deliver Waitrose own brand goods for less and price match the others for brands.
Pursued by a bear - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I shop at Waitrose because they sell better Java coffee than anywhere else.

I very rarely get anything else there.

T.
Bulls Crack - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to krikoman:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
>
> "I shop at Waitrose because it I'm a pretentious tw@"

I'm mystified - why is Waitrose pretentious? Do they pretend to sell good food? And where does one do ones non-pretentious shop then? LIDL/ALDI? Too self-consciously ironic surely?
steve taylor - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to deepsoup:
> (In reply to owlart)
> [...]
>
> Indeed: http://i.imgur.com/LH70J.jpg

PMSL - thanks.
alooker - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Philip: minimum price for online shopping and they charge to deliver. Whilst they do deliver to my house they don't to quite a few addresses
bouldery bits - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at Waitrose because I know when they sell stuff off cheap (fruit and veg and that)
JJL - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Horse:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
> [...]
> That was Sloper wasn't it.

Nah. He'd have said "hoi poloi" or "proles"
Timmd on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Bulls Crack:
> (In reply to krikoman)
> [...]
>
> I'm mystified - why is Waitrose pretentious? Do they pretend to sell good food? And where does one do ones non-pretentious shop then? LIDL/ALDI? Too self-consciously ironic surely?

Waitrose are ment to be the most ethical supermarket chain which is why i've shopped there, might have to switch to local shops and a whosaler called Lembas in Sheffield though.
woolsack - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I shop at Waitrose and Lidl, a sort of grocery ying-yang

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John_Hat - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

Lady Blue shops at Waitrose because its one of the few supermarkets to stock fresh gluten-free sandwiches...

Actually I think it might be the only one.
Dauphin - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I shop at Waitrose because the isles are filled with top drawer clout.

D
Robert Durran - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Dauphin:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
>
> I shop at Waitrose because the isles are filled with top drawer clout.

What, the whole archipelago?



Dauphin - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Robert Durran:

mainly the meat section

d
I like climbing - on 20 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
They screwed up big time on that but for me Waitrose and Booths are the best supermarkets.
Neil Williams - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to John_Hat:

M and S now do. I just had one, yummy...

Neil
Glyno - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Dauphin:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
>
> I shop at Waitrose because the isles are filled with top drawer clout.
>
> D

milftastic!
Mike Stretford - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Bulls Crack:
> (In reply to krikoman)
> [...]
>
> I'm mystified - why is Waitrose pretentious?

I think the missuse of the word 'pretentious' might have started up here. People used to refer to Tony Wilson as 'pretentious' usually with the t word on the end.

In reply to Cú Chullain: Did hear a woman shouting at her child in Waitrose once. The kid was called India.

Inspired me so now I have two children called Mogadishu and Kyrgyzstan
mattrm - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

While shell didn't actually do it, this is quite funny in a similar vein:

http://arcticready.com/social/gallery

Waitrose do have a good booze selection and I do make the trip there occasionally. Otherwise I'm basically too poor. I suppose it's any publicity is good publicity?
hokkyokusei - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

"One shops at Waitrose because there is no Booths locally".
Turdus torquatus on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

They sell Montezuma's chocolate.
Blue Straggler - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to grumpybearpantsclimbinggoat:

India is not an uncommon name for a girl.
Turdus torquatus on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Blue Straggler:
> (In reply to grumpybearpantsclimbinggoat)
>
> India is not an uncommon name for a girl.

Whereas it has only been used once as the name for a country.

dissonance - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Blue Straggler:

> India is not an uncommon name for a girl.

if you shop in waitrose.

Padraig on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
Aldi: Because going to Waitrose requires a bath and a shave.
abseil on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

I'm a very superior human being and I refuse to mix with peasants.
Only a hill - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
There's a lot of class snobbery in this thread. Surely in 2012 we're above such things--or at least we should aspire to be?
Sir Chasm - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Only a hill: I am above it, I'm just waiting for the plebs to catch up.
mkean - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Only a hill:
Can't start aspiring to things, you posh sod. ;-)

I shop at Waitrose because it happens to be round the corner.
fire_munki on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
I shop at Waitrose because the yummy mummys are the yummiest!
tlm - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

Waitrose are the only shop to still sell glycerine based soaps in yummy fruit flavours at a reasonable price. The choice of soaps has become woefully inadequate since people started using those liquid soaps in squeezy pots. I always stock up whenever I see a Waitrose, which isn't often enough as they don't have them up here in the far north...
Wainers44 - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I shop at Waitrose because they never thought to add that name to the list on the ASBO....
Dave Garnett - on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Bulls Crack:
> (In reply to krikoman)
> [...]
>
> I'm mystified - why is Waitrose pretentious? Do they pretend to sell good food? And where does one do ones non-pretentious shop then? LIDL/ALDI? Too self-consciously ironic surely?

How can Waitrose be pretentious? They have one in Buxton.
gethin_allen on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:
I think the nearest waitrose to me is 45 miles away in cardiff. Well you know, it's not like I live in a city of over 200,000 people is it. Oh no, I do.
Tbh, Tesco is getting expensive enough so even if they built one on my local highstreet I wouldn't use it.
edunn on 21 Sep 2012
In reply to grumpybearpantsclimbinggoat:

Surely that should be Mogadishu and Bishkek, OR Somalia and Kyrgyzstan. You're kids are so going to get bullied for that mistake.
Jim Lancs - on 25 Sep 2012
Jus - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain:

My local mini Waitrose always have tonnes of discounted food near the sell by date. On Sunday they had a load of £5.50 pizzas for £2!!
In reply to Jus: Seconded, and they do sell Vogel Soya & Linseed bread which is my fave. I go whenever I am in Chester and once got four meals for two for £12 !!!! incl Heston's sausages and one of their 'finest' Pizza's for £2.00. Granted though it is a bit expensive for some items but not always - like anything really if u can shop around you'll get some bargains :-)
owlart - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: Friends of mine once were paid to take sandwiches out of Waitrose! The sandwiches were on offer at £2.25 each or 2 for £3 or somthing similar. The sandwiches, however, were reduced to 50p each, so they bought two. The till saw that they had bought two and duly subtracted £1.50 from their bill, leaving the store owing them 50p! The checkout girl was puzzled and called the manager, who said that in order for the till to balance, she should pay them the 50p! They left with 2 sandwiches and 50p richer!
lummox - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: I'm scared to go to the Mozzers at Five Lanes End.
Jus - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Allan McDonald (Gwydyr MC):
> (In reply to Jus) Seconded, and they do sell Vogel Soya & Linseed bread which is my fave.

ha! me too.

Jus - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to owlart:

Brilliant. I bought a £10 worth of sandwiches for £3 the other today and they tasted perfectly fresh to me.
ripper - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Jus: Vogel's bread is ACE Iagree but it's the Wholemeal & Oat for me - heavy as a brick and takes ages to toast but one slice and you know you've eaten something! Original Mixed Grain is nice too...
blurty - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to FrankBooth:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
> I once asked a staff member if she could pont me to her chicken breasts

I was in our bakers for some bread rolls when an impressively pneumatic girl asked me what I wanted. 'two white paps' I replied. So embarrassing.
Queenie - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Jim Lancs:

Hehe! Thanks for the chuckle.
subalpine - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Cú Chullain: i would shop at waitrose because they are neutral wrt the badger cull

i will actively avoid sainsburys, tescos and morrisons though:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2012/sep/25/supermarkets-protests-badger-cull
birdie num num - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to subalpine:
Do Waitrose do organic badger steaks though? Num Num is finally learning the error of his ways and is trying to shoplift ethically.
mkean - on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to subalpine:
i will actively avoid sainsburys, tescos and morrisons though: http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2012/sep/25/supermarkets-protests-badger-cull

I'd give radio4 a miss, they were advocating eating badgers earlier.
Steph-in-the-West on 25 Sep 2012
In reply to Only a hill:
> (In reply to Cú Chullain)
> There's a lot of class snobbery in this thread. Surely in 2012 we're above such things--or at least we should aspire to be?

For goodness sake - lighten up.... This is all tongue in cheek and very funny!!!!

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