In reply to French Erick:
you owe it to yourself and you owe it to them. i have a family and the best you can do is not be a watered-down has-been who gave it all away. broken fathers are a terrible thing. its a similar bravery that has you being head of a family that has you climbing - where anything but your best is not acceptable. dont be sacred of just having fun.
i climb with people from all over the world, and being a foreigner (not a brit tho) in japan is a huge part of what has me here. climbing with locals keeps the perspective big, minimizes me imposing my own culture on what is essentially intrinsic to all humans.
that said 70% of my climbing i do alone.
you too are a stanger in a strange land: we have alternatives others dont, both in place and mind.
choose another enemy to make your worst, theres plenty out there. mediocrity is a good choice if i may offer one.
'frozen pickle'! gold. sums it up perfectly, may have to borrow the term.