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Topic - Please help improve my pgce personal statement!

climbercool - on 05 Dec 2012
Im currently living in France and don't have anybody to proof read my statement for me. my writing skills leave a lot to be desired and i need to hand it in over the next couple of days so any help would be great.
If anybody would take the time to have a read and highlight some of the statements more major problems i would be extremely grateful. Don't hold back, if you feel a whole section is useless it probably is and i would like to know. If anybody has anything they think i should add that would be great to.

During my time in education, both as a student and teacher, I have developed a great awareness of the positive impact a good teacher can have upon a student. I have seen how a good teacher can have a fundamental role in shaping a student’s character. It would be my aim as a teacher to do more than just teach a syllabus, I would aspire to encourage confidence, critical thinking and a genuine passion to learn in my students.

Geography is a subject that interests me both academically and personally. As a school subject Geography is in a unique position in that it tackles both the human and physical sciences. For me to teach the importance of the blending of these two disciplines would be immensely rewarding and is something that would inspire me to teach. Geography will hold the answer to many global issues of paramount importance in the 21st century, such as climate change and a continually growing population. Teaching a subject dealing with issues of such global significance will ensure I remain just as passionate about the subject as I am now.
In the two years since finishing my degree I have gained a great deal of experience working with young people. Whilst living in Bristol I took part in a three week “schools associate scheme “program at Sefton Park primary school. During this placement I frequently worked with small groups of students, this allowed me to develop a good understanding of the organisational and behavioural management skills needed to teach a class. During this placement I worked with both year 2 and year 5 pupils, I was able to develop a good rapport with both age groups but found I gained more fulfilment working with the older students.
Following this temporary role I took a more permanent position as a learning support assistant at Petroc College. In this role I had great opportunity to observe the efficacy of different teaching approaches upon/with the same class of students. There were many challenging students in this class and being able to observe how differently a class behaved in the presence of different teachers was an enlightening revelation into the importance of good teaching.
I finished this job to go and work as a qualified kitesurfing instructor in Western Australia. This role necessitated that I work as the sole instructor in charge of students. This taught me a great deal about the responsibilities involved in teaching and gave me considerable insight into how to deal with situations when they do become difficult. Throughout this role I taught both adults and children. Again it was working with children that I found most rewarding and this has reinforced my desire to train as a school teacher.
During my time at school some of my best experiences came from the various extra curricular activities I attended. I am still a keen sports person and would be to share my enthusiasm for the sports I enjoy by coaching sports teams and running outdoor pursuit activities in any school i was to work.
As a result of my work experience I have come to understand what a challenging, committing and sometimes stressful career teaching can be. However having experienced the rewarding nature of truly inspiring a young person this has assured me that teaching is the right career for me. I believe that the knowledge, skills and experience I have already acquired together with my enthusiasm and aptitude for teaching would allow me to make a positive influence in the school environment.
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