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Who do you think is more intelligent, you or your partner?

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 Denni 22 Jan 2013
Bit of a random question I grant you but I suppose it depends on what your definition of intelligence is. My definition of intelligence is someone who is able to process complex information easily and finds subjects like math, physics etc quite simple. (this is not me!) Someone who can retain information, thinks outside the box and is good at learning from experience. Other attributes make up intelligence of course but if someone asked me, that's what I'd say.

Our neighbours were over having a brew and were talking about education, degrees, university etc and the question piped up. I immediately said my wife who was quite surprised I said that but it is true. It is not something we really care about or is relevant to us. I asked our neighbours and was surprised that they kept trying to justify their intelligence to each other settling on "we are both intelligent but in different ways".

So do you care and what is you definition of intelligence?
 LaMentalist 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

Depends on subject matter for me really and the fact that I'm currently single . But my last few partners have been far more intelligent than I academically but practically quite clueless in some aspects .

I'm okay with practical & theoretical electronics ( design & build circuits , amps , speakers etc ) for example but poor at maths .

I'm very dopey & naive in many ways but consider myself fairly streetwise after growing up around certain types & less affluent parts of cities you can't help but be influenced by them .

I have a close friend who has very few qualifications but after starting a business with £67.00 over 20 years ago is now a very wealthy man . His wife is a highly qualified accountant but would struggle to wire a plug or tell you where to pour the oil in her shiney new audi .
 Dauphin 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

Not sure the name of the phenomena but couples tend to loose knowledge /skills after years of living together - 'his' & 'her' knowledge becomes very specific. When one partner dies or leaves the other is often left unable to manage because they have forgotten how to do certain things. So your neighbors are partially correct.

D
 Skyfall 22 Jan 2013
In reply to LaMentalist:

> my last few partners have been far more intelligent than I academically but practically quite clueless in some aspects .

> I have a close friend who has very few qualifications but after starting a business with £67.00 over 20 years ago is now a very wealthy man . His wife is a highly qualified accountant but would struggle to wire a plug or tell you where to pour the oil in her shiney new audi .

Funny the number of times you hear this said as some sort of generalisation or even justificaton(?) isn't it, but actually I don't really buy it. I'm mean, yes, someone can clearly by academically bright and useless at DIY (for example) but that may be down to personal choice or not having the time or someone to enthuse them. There are "some" people who are very bright intelectually but also seem to live on another world where the little things don't matter - but in my experience these are pretty rare.

If you've spent most of your childhood and young adult life doing exam after exam you may just not be arsed to learn a load of practical things that seem pointless at the time. You may not have had a father who showed you how to wire a plug, solder a joint etc (I did but I imagine it's becoming increasingly rare). If you are bright and get on the corporate ladder you probably won't see the point or have the time to learn how to build your own home or whatever. It doesn't mean they couldn't do those things if they wanted to.

Yes, I have met entrepreneurs who are actually illiterate and have sold businesses worth several millions. But most of them do seem bright and, given the opportunity and inclination, may well have done quite well academically. Maybe they were brought up on the wrong side of the track but made good anyway, or maybe they just couldn't be bothered with school and it was too late to recover that aspect. But I've also met entrepreneurs who are far, far brighter tham I am and have the acedemic record to prove it.

People come in all different packages and I just don't believe these two stereotypes is what I am saying. There's always a wide spectrum.

 Skyfall 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Dauphin:

> When one partner dies or leaves the other is often left unable to manage because they have forgotten how to do certain things.

Yes, I get that and you do see it. It's partly what I was trying to say - a large part is down to environment, not innate intelligence.
 Trangia 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

I read the OP twice and didn't understand it, so showed it to my partner who explained it to me and asked if I understood it now?

I then said "Yes, dear"
 Yanis Nayu 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni: The dog.
 KellyKettle 22 Jan 2013
I don't really care, I've had several partners in the past who were spectacularly gifted at certain academic subjects, but outside of those fields really struggled; and some who were rather more rounded...

I've never really been involved with anyone who's sufficiently less intelligent than myself to notice, and at least one who has an almost frightening abilty to retain and recall information, but absolutely no spatial reasoning or mechanical aptitude.

It's hard for me to appraise my own intelligence, I feel that I have a knack for getting a facile understanding of subjects and finding information, without retaining deep knowledge on anything in particular; My partners and friends have always insisted that I'm much brighter than them, but I always feel that it's just them getting a misleading impression from how quickly I can pick things up.

It's nice to have someone who can challenge you, it makes for a much more equal partnership!
 LaMentalist 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Skyfall:

People come in all different packages and I just don't believe these two stereotypes is what I am saying. There's always a wide spectrum.

Yes of course I wouldn't dispute that for a second .Just an example & not a particularily good one . My main point being that I'm a bit thick but I get by ( mostly as I'm quite a good listener & read heaps I think ).

Just curious now Skyfall how would you describe a person who didn't put any oil in an older vehicle that was used everyday for two years & they were the only one to use it ?

Denni sorry to go off thread here .
 Tall Clare 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

Intelligence is one of the main things I look for in a partner, and I think Mr TC and I are about equal, perhaps in different areas. I'm more 'intellectual', he's more 'people', we're both pretty practical.

I've known quite a few people, some of whom are relatives, who are brilliant at maths and physics but who are very unintelligent in other areas. I don't believe that mathematical/logical reasoning is a great 'single' measure of intelligence though.

Initiative and an aptitude for objectivity are some of the traits I consider to be part of what makes up an intelligent person.
 Steve John B 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni: I think I'm more intelligent, she thinks she is. We're probably both right as our definitions will be based on what we're better at!
What Goes Up 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni: I'm the more intelligent as I chose her for my wife. She must be thick as pig-shit because she chose me for a husband.
 Timmd 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Skyfall:
> (In reply to LaMentalist)
>
> People come in all different packages and I just don't believe these two stereotypes is what I am saying. There's always a wide spectrum.

I agree, though I think they were probably just examples of different kinds of intelligence to be honest.

I do know of somebody who is very intelligent, and his university teacher had to tell him before he sat an important exam that the idea was to answer as many questions as possible, rather than to focus on the most challenging one(s).

The extremes at either end do definately exist, but I agree there are poeple at different points along the spectrum.
 another_alex 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:
I think there's different types of intelligence. I find maths and physics type stuff relatively difficult, but can pick up a new language really easily. I have friends who are the opposite.
 Skyfall 22 Jan 2013
In reply to LaMentalist:

> Just curious now Skyfall how would you describe a person who didn't put any oil in an older vehicle that was used everyday for two years & they were the only one to use it ?

A fairly typical woman who is uninterested in cars ....

Isn't that what blokes are for?
In reply to another_alex: There are definitely different types of intelligence and i think some of the academic forms are more down to having a good memory than anything else. For me, true intelligence is having an ability to take an idea (either new or pre existing) and then develop it into something better or even entirely different, i'm thinking of inventors or people discovering new scientific ideas etc. My missus speaks about five languages but is useless at anything practical and i'm the opposite so it's pretty impossible to define who is most intelligent.
ice.solo 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

Women who seek equal intelligence with men are unambitious.
- timothy leary
 Conf#2 22 Jan 2013
In reply to What Goes Up:

Ahhhhwwwwwwww


She's pretty clever, the partner to me. I am not sure of our relative intelligence.
Bingers 22 Jan 2013
In reply to Denni:

Well, my wife is French, so that will be me then.

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