UKC

I went to my local gym yesterday. Normally I make sure that I have no valuables with me and I don't bother putting my things in a locker as I usually go there in rough working clothes which are hardly worth nicking. However, yesterday, I had about three pounds worth of loose change in my trouser pockets and didn't really think about it. When I went back after my session I noticed that all but about 50p of the loose change had "disappeared". OK, my own fault for not using a locker but, if there is a thief around I'd like him to get his come uppance.

Any suggestions? I thought about a loaded mouse trap in my pocket!

In reply to FesteringSore:

make a fake coin out of pollonium and keep it in your pocket - anybody that nicks it will suffer!

In reply to Dr.S at work:

In reply to FesteringSore:

Snooze u loose. I wud ave nicked ur trouzers aswell innit.

In reply to FesteringSore:

Can/did you lock your locker?

In reply to Indy:

In reply to FesteringSore:

Next time put an old non UK coin - frank, peso, deutshmark or similar - in with the change. After stealing it he'll be stuck with it but still feel unable to throw a coin away so he'll put it in the back of a drawer somewhere and for the rest of his life will be racked with guilt over the reminder of his despicable act.

In reply to FesteringSore:

Fenn trap in the bottom of your gym bag, then wait for the screams

In reply to FesteringSore:

a special pair of trap trousers, in a special locker and put all your real clothes in another locked one. With a fair dusting of chilli powder and hope he rubs his face(or better places!) soon after? or some dye that won't wash of skin quickly, just wet the pocket with it just as you head off. You might even get to see who it was. Probably some electric shock gadgets available in jokes shops too.

In reply to FesteringSore:

Hole in your pocket?

Why leave any coins??

In reply to FesteringSore:

Put a bag of red ink in the pocket so that if gently disturbed it will spill everywhere. Then wait outside in a casual place. Eventually you will spot the thief and can then deliver the classic line "Aha! I've caught you red-handed"

In reply to SenzuBean:

Hmmm, got me thinking. An uninflated balloon with a small quantity of ink and a small length of tubing(about 2-3mm diameter) inserted and secured in the neck of the balloon(and an OLD pair of trousers).

Might actually be feasible

In reply to FesteringSore:

Do it!

In reply to SenzuBean:


How do you know Morten Harket stole the money?

In reply to Steve-J-E:


He's always doing a take on me!

In reply to FesteringSore:

You didn't put it in a locker therefore it was clearly abandoned so it's 'Gym Swag'

In reply to FesteringSore:

It's really piss poor that someone had the cheek to rifle through your stuff, probably some scroat who's sneaked in on the off chance. I think the best thing you can do is inform management and move on, if you do find out who it was though, get him in a headlock and write c##t on his head.

In reply to Wsdconst:

with a drawing compass

In reply to rallymania:


Or a Stanley knife, either will do.

In reply to Dr.S at work:

I always thought that a nice medical cesium source, lead coated on the sides but open on top, and fitted into a honeypot bike seatpost would be nice surprise for the guys who keep nicking bike parts at our institute cycle shed....

CB

In reply to cb294:

Or one of these?

youtube.com/watch?v=ZYlBT1d_GWo&

In reply to purplemonkeyelephant:

Nice. Maybe that would be a good use for the tannerite mentioned in the lawnmower deth thread...

CB