Both these examples are crap
You shouldn't have opened you're trap
In a limerick battle
There's no room for prattle
You'll see that my rhymes are on tap
Sorry but i don't agree
It's important that all speech is free
Though some posts on here are mince
Including those about that guy called Prince
The only person who's right is me
In reply to Offwidth: It's funny you talk about muscle
And with lyrics you're trying to hustle
I don't like to brag
You're a doe, I am a stag!
No point keeping it under my bushel
The style should of course rhyme and scan
And we'd all like to see some elan
But it's simple in form
And so still quite the norm
For some slips in style not to ban.
Prince said its a sign o the times
When he talked of his social declines
And of course you are wrong
When you bang on your gong
But ne'er mind if it has wit and it rhymes
Oh dear why this frontage so ghoul.
With lines that make one look a tool.
Not a man, more a sow,
Or a mule or a cow,
With a mind so disturbing and cruel.
You're retort, for the job is not fit
You make yourself look like a twit
As this claptrap you spout
The crowd will all shout
What's he ever done on Grit?
There once was young man named honnold
Who's trouble always was three fold
He never used a rope
A fall meant no hope
Of finding a third rhyme with honnold
Oh ouch I say, ouch and then some
The insults continue to come
Though try as I might
With my less manly fight
will sticks and stones soon seen more welcome?
It's a rule with our site breed of pedant
With their superior noise oh so splendent
Though they poke with their rules
they look such picky fools
When they end up both hoist and defendant
Its true that this man who's called Honnold
enjoys climbing the reverse of coddled
But I'd like to see
If his climbings so free
With a gut full of Ronald McDonald's
My next meeting starts at ten thirty
And despite my posts being quite shirty
I had some fun too
Even though it was you
So don't feel your rhymes have much hurt 'e
In reply to Offwidth: There once was a man from sprocket
Who went to the moon in a rocket
The rocket went bang
His bol***ck went twang
And found his Pr**k in his pocket
There once was a man named Joe Brown
Who's climbing was of high renown
A first ascent, he did grab
Of three pebble slab
Twas always the jewel in his crown
Climbing three pebble slab, what a hero!
Stands Joe Brown like emporer Nero
When it comes to the grade
Concencus will fade
I think we'll agree it's E zero
In reply to George Fisher: Have you heard of a man named Dawes?
On hard grit he rewrote the laws
And on Indian face
He did win the race
Despite some hairstyle flaws
I don't want to second guess ya
But you know about Reinhold Messner?
He was king of the hill
And it gave him a thrill
To fly up mount-ains like a Cessna
There was a young man called Honnold
Who, compared with us, was of different mould.
He floated up rock
like a bit of a cock,
But surely he's worth Olympic Gold!
There was a young fellow named Ghandi
Who went in a bar for a shandy
And with his loin cloth
He wiped the froth off
And the barman said
"Blimey, that's handy!"
My reply is all about Coxsey
Who's climbing is pretty damn foxy
Her dynos are drastic
Her footwork fantastic
Perhaps her fingers, she coats with epoxy?
