UKC

Who would it be and doing what? Let's assume you can pay them...!!

In reply to Heike:

I'd like to employ Bear Grylls, and instruct him to stay well away from me and all forms of media.

In reply to Clauso:
That's rubbish , you won't get very far...even with that!! He can't climb hard, but he might get the media onto you??
I was thinking more along the lines of having a worker to do all the cleaning, prepare nice meals, swipe out the bouldering garage and carry my rucksacks to the crag.

Full living wage though (if I could afford it myself!!)

Someone to carry my skis to the top of the climb and carry the climbing gear back down...
When can you start?

In reply to Heike:

I would have a butler. Specifically Willikins from the Pratchet books.

In reply to Heike:

I would have a cleaner and tidier. Who didn't mind 3 dogs helping them do it.

In reply to Heike:

I have some 175 staff and employees and there are still things that I'm only happy doing myself. I'm obviously a hopeless delegator.

In reply to Heike:

I'd have a gimp that would lead all those nasty, gnarly, death on a stick winter pitches for me. Oh, wait, I've already got one of those...

In reply to Heike:

I'd quite like a waker-upper. Preferably with a cup of tea and a nice foot massage.

Anything would be better than 3 different ring tones going off at 10 minute intervals.

In reply to Dax H:

I am with you on the butler!! That would be lovely.

In reply to Heike:
Someone to do all the crap jobs which take up potential climbing/training/reading/thinking time and which I therefore badly neglect ie car stuff, house stuff, computer stuff, money stuff. I don't care who they would be as long as they did the jobs efficiently and unobtrusively.

In reply to Heike:

The list is endless, but I'd settle for my own personal Masseuse.

In reply to Heike:

I don't need anyone, but I'd like [1] a chef [2] a driver.

In reply to Heike:
I would like some bearers when I go climbing. i would want them to meet me at the start of a climb having carried ropes, rack, water. prepare a cup of tea, dry shirt and towel, make sure no one else on route so no waiting. They could then meet me at the top with my boots and collect all equipment.
If they could paint a line up the Route in the correct colour, that would be useful


I did try and recruit some in a pub in Wales but they didn't seem keen....

In reply to Heike:

So many possibilities, but what would really make a difference at the moment is a chauffeur to take me to and from work every day.

He or she would pick me up in some sort of luxury vehicle with blacked out windows and I would get back 2+ hours a day to read, think, edit, make calls, drink coffee or sleep.

In reply to Heike:

David Cameroon, my whipping boy.

In reply to L'Eeyore:


There's a story with a happy ending.

In reply to Dax H:


Alfred Pennyworth.

In reply to Dax H:


The gentleman's gentleman

In reply to Heike:

Pfft. Even my butler has a butler.

In reply to Heike:

a driver, so I could have a pint or three after a days cragging (especially in Scotland)

In reply to Heike:

A cleaner, which I'm quite likely to get fairly soon.

In reply to Heike:
I'd be happy enough if I could afford a few tradespeople to fix up my house for me while I'm off at work.
Once the house is finished I'd sack them all and employ a general butler/servant person to generally keep the place tidy but more importantly to come and rescue me when I have mechanical issues out on the bike or when I've cycled to work and the weather turns crap as I'm about to leave, or even just when I get carried away in the mid ride pub/cake stop and am too pissed/full of cake to get home.

Edit to add who it would be; I think I'd have to get Lance Armstrong, he must be getting short of cash now that everyone knows that he's a massive cheating arsehole and having to pick up after and help out a rubbish amateur cyclist like myself would be a nice role reversal.