UKC

Evening all,
The thread "Guidebook descriptions that freak you out" got me thinking about the err 'unique' language guidebooks use. I thought the UKC hive mind could come up with some translations for example...

"High in the grade" -Take the adjective grade and add two full grades. E1 becomes E3 ect. Also translates as "So you reckon you can climb this grade do you? We'll see about that."

Over to you UKC...

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

"In a fine position"........be afraid, be very afraid!

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

Make an awkward move onto the ledge and then to the top. .............becomes scrabble onto the ledge and then find there is no way on and no retreat.

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:
"Take a firm stance at the belay" = 'make sure the silly sod only kills himself'
"Followed with interest" = 'gibber along promising yourself that it's about time you took up golf'

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

"move up feature x (bold)" = "shit your pants and wonder how the first ascentionist managed to do the moves with balls that big"
"scramble off" = shit your pants crossing 15 metres of vertical choss
"poor belay/runner" = no belay/runner
"gain the <insert feature of choice>" = crux
HVS 3b = you're gonna die

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

'interesting' - always a warning!

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

A good tick for the well rounded VS leader
-
Not one to break into VS on.


Never desperate- expect total climb time to be around 6hours through confusion rather than difficulty.

Protection is sparse in places- 2 bits of gear in 70m

Absorbing climbing- confusing and difficult to read.

Adequate protection- groundfall potential

Requires big cams and hexes- sandbag offwidth

Has only a couple of hard sections- since we took the time to mention the difficulties, take heed, they are difficult!

Take the rather eliminate line- climb the lowest ascented route on the crag

A real mountaneering adventure - very loose

Start from the boulder- have difficulty mounting the boulder

A striking route- requires powerful moves

An intricate line- can feel MUCH harder if you aren't careful with your route-finding.

Not the hardest route at the grade- but still very hard.

Good value- desperate and sandbagged

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

VS 4c, climb the ... (5a?) ... = Top-end 5a

awkward jamming = you're going to get more scraped up then if you got dragged along the road.

pad delicately up the friction slab = what are you doing here - you're gonna die if you slip

In reply to Laramadness:


Likewise 'entertaining', 'amusing' or 'a perplexing finish' (desperately rounded top-out)

In reply to Greasy Prusiks:

"...somehow reach a good hold..." = The author couldn't do this bit