UKC

/ Lanyard fetish

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Greenbanks - on 08 Jun 2018

I'm left wondering why many at my work-place wear lanyards (name/rank/serial number etc etc). The organisation does not require it. Some people revel in it, wearing them down the pub for the Friday lunchtime pint etc. An odd, almost fetishistic attachment.

I can see the potential ID/security advantages, but it seems just too nerdy a behaviour. What's your view? And do you wear such a thing?

3
john arran - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

Pretty useful for clipping in on multi-pitch belays, but other than that I don't see much point.

2
Rob Parsons on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

I need to wear one at work constantly since it literally functions as a key for maglocked doors. I then just forget I'm wearing the thing so I sometimes find that I still have it on when not strictly necessary. Nothing 'nerdy' about it.

1
Ramblin dave - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

There are situations where it's practical, but it does sometimes start to remind me of the backstage passes in Wayne's World:
https://giphy.com/gifs/fail-fun-entertainment-hKYigb3Djp8pa/fullscreen

Greenbanks - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Rob Parsons:

Come on, you love it really

Phil79 - on 08 Jun 2018
Lemony - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

The really cool kids* have those extendy lift pass holder thingies. The ones that periodically flick you in the testicles when you let go of your pass.

 

*Like me...

Rob Parsons on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

It's just work, man; just work.

1
Rigid Raider - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

It's not just lanyards; flouro or "jobsworth" jackets are the other modern juju; wear one of those and you can step out in front of a speeding truck or a moving forklift and it will bounce off you.

Fozzy on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

All of our classroom & storeroom doors are on electronic locks activated by our badge tags, and wearing our ID badges at all times is mandatory.

I’ve gone for a zinger thing clipped into a belt loop, which means no bending down, but also means it snags occasionally & sings back into my nads. 

yorkshireman - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

Security - we need them to be allowed into the building.

Doors - to physically use the lift or open doors to sections of the building.

Printing - print anything, anywhere and walk to any printer, swipe your card and it comes out.

Canteen - load of cash on the card and use it to pay

> (name/rank/serial number etc etc)

Does yours have loads of in on it? Seems odd. Ours just have name and photo. We don't have any other identifying info - we recently had to swap all our branded lanyards for plain black ones in case you lose it somewhere then there's no identifying features for anyone to try and use it nefariously.

The alternative is to get chipped and do away with them completely?

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/07/25/technology/microchips-wisconsin-company-employees.html

idiotproof (Buxton MC) - on 08 Jun 2018

Friday lunchtime pint.... not likely for anyone ive worked for in the last 10 years.

Anyway..., like others mine has door fob opener on so should wear ir more than i do. We have a lot of clients/members of public in our building so mine just has photo and name as ID to identify staff.

In the same way i often find myself getting in the car still with chalkbag on or in a pub with a sling still over my shoulder... i do sometimes find i still have lanyard on some hours after leaving work. But my job and company hold no kudos (quite the opposite in some ways) so any suggestion that it is a conscious or subconscious 'choice' is frankly laughable

 

cb294 - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

You have to put the keycard in the pocket and let the lanyard dangle towards you knees. Proves you are from East Germany or Eastern Europe.

Probably some kind of secret handshake, but no, me neither....

CB

malky_c - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

When I'm working in a client office, you need it to get through all of the doors, and I tend to find I've even cycled home with it on.

When I'm in my company's office, it comes out of the drawer once a year when the auditor is on the prowl.

 

Phil Anderson on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

I don't quite get this thing of needing a lanyard because you use the card for things.

Like many, I need mine to enter the building, open internal doors, unlock my computer, buy stuff from the canteen / vending machines etc and I simply keep it in my pocket. 

Do people wear their credit cards on a lanyard when they go shopping?

Plus lanyard users have to bend over to pay for something in the canteen as the card won't reach the pay terminal. Weird.

Hardonicus - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

A got a friend to copy the RFID from the card onto a keyfob so I don't have to be a tw*t in a lanyard. It's now on a bunch of work keys in my pocket.

subtle on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

Hmm, I have a fetish.

It doesn't involve lanyards.

JoshOvki on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

We get escorted to a room by security until they can verify who we are and what we are doing there, if they are not clearly visible (or a clearly visible visitors pass being escorted by someone wearing a staff pass), with no exceptions. Made an interesting few moments when the CEO of the company was accosted by security.

yorkshireman - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Phil Anderson:

> I don't quite get this thing of needing a lanyard because you use the card for things.

> Like many, I need mine to enter the building, open internal doors, unlock my computer, buy stuff from the canteen / vending machines etc and I simply keep it in my pocket. 

Ever since the Paris attacks (my office is in Paris) we've had to have our badge (with photo) on display at all times in the building. A lanyard is the simplest way to do this.

> Plus lanyard users have to bend over to pay for something in the canteen as the card won't reach the pay terminal. Weird.

Mine's got one of those retractable bits on it, so you can pull it to extend to the card reader, so no issue at all.

Greenbanks - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to subtle:

Take it no further on this thread though....

steveriley - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

As ever, Half Man Half Biscuit holds the answers.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kbdr-fh76v8

plyometrics - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

I worked somewhere a few years ago that introduced lanyards with an associated ID card and mugshot. 

I decided to test mine out by replacing the picture of me for a head and shoulders shot of the Honey Monster.

Unsurprisingly, I was never stopped. 

(Edit: For clarity, and before anyone has a go; no, I don’t look like the honey monster!)

Post edited at 19:17
Hooo - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

Total social disgrace in my book. My younger years were spent in the live entertainment business, and if you were seen outside the gig with your lanyard visible you'd be ripped to shreds - by your colleagues, and possibly by punters trying to steal it. Unless you were using it to blag entrance to a club of course

In my current job some clients insist on having one visible at all times, but it comes off as I walk through the exit, without fail. I see people on the train wearing their ID, and think to myself how lucky my life has turned out.

2
teh_mark on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Hooo:

I currently work in the life events industry, and lanyards are a menace. Mine gets tied to a belt loop and shoved in my pocket without exception, even when it leads to being accosted by the venue or security, because you only close a flightcase lid on your lanyard once before realising it's a really stupid idea to wear it around your neck.

LastBoyScout on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Greenbanks:

Can't stand wearing them. I have a fob for opening the office door and it's on a lanyard, as it's easier to find in my bag, but it's mainly found dumped on my desk or in my pocket. Also has the keys for the bike locks I keep in the bike shed. There's no name or photo on it - you won't get past reception without a fob if you're not known. Interesting one this week where a guy that's worked in another office for years came to ours and wasn't recognised by new receptionist.

I also don't have a company branded lanyard, as I don't want anyone to know where I work and, if I lose it, they can't gain access to the building/steal my bike.

A mate of mine works for a company where you have to wear a lanyard, as it's colour coded to your rank/status.

marsbar - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to LastBoyScout:

We have different colours for people who are DBS checked and not.  Those with the wrong colour are not permitted to be unattended with children.  

I don't like wearing it around my neck so I tend to have it on my desk mostly.  

Hooo - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to teh_mark:

While actually working I always used to wear mine inside my T shirt. Far too many hazards around to be wearing a loop dangling off your neck. I knew a guy who nearly strangled himself climbing off a truss onto the ladder and hooking his lanyard on a bolt.

wintertree - on 08 Jun 2018
In reply to Rob Parsons:

> a key for maglocked doors

A juvenile approach to such things often keeps me amused.

The magnetic door lock for our bike store at work used to use our cards - now it’s a code.  I used to find a foot braced on the frame and a good strong tug was less faff than digging a card out...  Perfectly harmless on that kind of lock - a very energy inefficient electromagnet holding a ferous plate on the door.

When visiting colleagues in a couple of swipe card controlled buildings I just tend to follow someone else in whilst looking suitably purposeful and/or dim.  Amazing how many places have controlled access but no security staff present and no security culture.  

I will wear a visitors pass when asked to at the more seriously minded places I sometimes visit, especially on the rare occasion there’s armed security.  It comes off the instant I leave mind you.

A conference in the San Diego Convention Centre a few years ago kept me endlessly amused as access to the escalators and from the funiculars was controlled by security staff checking badges - so there was a point to be scored each time an escalator was used...

 

Post edited at 23:14
John W - on 09 Jun 2018
In reply to plyometrics:

I used to amuse myself by playing the same game - having worked in the same place for thirty years, the introduction of photo id badges gave me lots of scope for substituting my ugly mug with George Clooney, Cary Grant, Roger Moore, Matt Damon etc. When this paled, I took a more exotic approach, including Oprah Winfrey, Martin Luther King and Chewbacca. Nobody (apart from my mates who were in on the game) ever noticed.

wintertree - on 09 Jun 2018
In reply to plyometrics:

> (Edit: For clarity, and before anyone has a go; no, I don’t look like the honey monster!)

But do you look like a Wookie?

mal_meech on 09 Jun 2018
In reply to Hooo:

Which is why any sensible company with an ID policy has safety lanyards as standard for the last 10+ years.

Safety lanyards are also really useful for pulling up a micro traction when rope soloing, firm enough to keep upward progress but the snap link breaks in a fall so no risk of loading your neck.

Hooo - on 09 Jun 2018
In reply to mal_meech:

I was referring to the rock and roll industry 25 years ago not even remotely sensible or with the slightest regard for safety. I dare say the situation has changed a lot now, the number of workplace fatalities would not be accepted today.

mal_meech on 09 Jun 2018
In reply to Hooo:

Aye, different time/ different attitude.

I’ve had discussions with a few subcontractors in other countries when they’ve tried to insist on a non-safety lanyard “for safety” during workshop visits...   

eroica64 - on 10 Jun 2018
In reply to teh_mark:

"life events industry" - what's that? Marriages, deaths, birthdays?


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