In reply to guestuser1987:
You suggest you are suffering from depression (apologies if I’ve got that wrong, in which case what I say below may not be applicable). Like you, I went into depression in my teens. Here’s what I learned.
If you don’t do something about this, have a good think about what position you will be in a year from now?
How about in 5 years, or 10 years?
Like you I went into depression in my teens, and I lived (existed) with it for 10 years until I asked for help. It feels like a massive risk to make that step, but you need to hold in your mind that you are also taking a massive risk by not asking for help – you are taking the very great risk that 10 years from now you will be in exactly the same hole (like I did). So when you feel the fear of stepping out to ask for help, remember the risk you are taking is nothing compared to the risk of doing nothing.
Also bear in mind that you are in a place you don’t want to be right now, you know that because you are asking for help. What is stopping you seeking help is the depression, the same processes which are keeping you depressed are also stopping you asking for help. Depression can become your identity, and you start to defend it, but please remember, you are not the depression, you are the one who is asking for help.
You can do something about this, you can ask for help, it is very easy to pseudo-rationalise why you don’t need to do anything about it, why you can wait and see how things are next month (ie. Let your depression talk for you). By going to your GP you have very little to loss, and a lot to gain, so it’s well worth the risk. If you don’t want to take medication then say so, there are counselling (talking) options through the NHS. If you have the money (around £40 a week) then you can go to a private counsellor. None of these options is a guarantee, but they offer an opportunity. I went to 4 different counsellors before I found one who understood what I was going through and could help me, so don’t just stick with something that isn’t working month in month out. You don’t have to stay depressed, you are only young, please don’t label yourself as ‘here for life’.
Best of luck