UKC

PMT- is it acceptable to be spoken to/at like a piece of dirt, and to also be the brunt of totally mental logic and reasoning. At the same time the said PMT'r can have a lovely, friendly and reasonable conversation with with a fellow sufferer of this affliction, not so when dealing with a penis carrier.

In reply to count: Popcorn at the ready...

In reply to count: Don't be fearful of the wrath, its ok to comment she'll never know . On the other hand maybe you are a fellow sufferer that can sympathise with having to put up with an un thoughtful penis wielder.

In reply to Submit to Gravity:

I too have popcorn at the ready.

However I can sympathise after suffering an 18 month relationship with a real mod cow who once a month went mental. Her mother was worse and became violent.

Stop being sexits and ether suck it up or ditch her.

In reply to count:

She's using the pmt as an excuse to be abusive towards you. Probably learnt it from her mother. Tell her she needs to control how she treats you, or the relationship is over. Feeling like shit is no reason to treat you like shit.

In reply to count: Am trying not to be sexist, just pointing out an observation. I do have sympathy for said PMT'rs, just struggle to understand it as im sure many men do

In reply to count: A lot of women struggle to understand it too. And it's quite probable that she has no idea how bad she is with you. So from a girly point of view I think your first step is a very calm conversation (at a rational time) about what happens. Followed by, I would guess, some time for her to accept / come to terms with / realise how bad it is for you. Then I guess it's up to her to try and temper her temper, or look for some help... whatever that might be.
Co:

In reply to count: keep calm and carry on is often the safest option in my relationship but I will snap back if she does her usual thing of answering a question with a question e.g. "babe, have you seen my running shoes?"
"why would I know where YOUR running shoes are?" or "where did you last have them?".

Annoys the crap out of me!

In reply to count:

Start slipping some agnus castus into her coco pops.

In reply to count:

I've suffered the wrath of a mad bint or two in the past , for me there is not much more freaky than this . Personally I'd rather have a face off with a big ugly bloke at least you have a rough idea of what to expect if it turns violent .

It pains me to say it but the worst offender was my Mum , don't get me wrong I love her but she was a proper scarey un predictable person when I was younger . Extremely violent towards my Dad & sometimes me , wine bottle to my head , briefcase in back of head etc etc and yes she got locked up for it eventually . It broke my heart at the time but in retrospect it was probably the safest thing for us all .

I can empathise and whenever I've seen even a glimmer of this behavour in past partners I've had to leave call me a lightweight but life is too short for that sh1t in my opinion & I think some people need to take more responsibilty for their behaviour , we can make excuses for it til the end of time but essentially I think a lot of people need to grow up .

Think I better make some more popcorn . . ..

In reply to count: Women want to try having to shave every single day, that'd put a bit of belly ache into perspective

In reply to blanchie14c:

<hiding behind settee now>

So when is it you're getting hitched Blanchie ? congratulations by the way ( no seriously now ) , well done . 80)

In reply to LaMentalist:
March 21st (if I make it!!)

Thanks from both of us! :-D

In reply to count:

Magnesium X (or "Bitch be gone" as I prefer to call it), recommended by a female friend, available at Boots etc, and now taken by my partner with a significant improvement at that special time of month!

In reply to blanchie14c:

Not long then , excellent good man hang in there ;0).

In reply to LaMentalist:
Nope, just the small matter of finding a suit and getting my arse to the venue, everything else now all done and in place.

The wife-to-be takes Feminax tablets when she is struggling, PMT husbands could strategicly place the odd box around the house and hope the womenfolk find them <putting them in the crisp/chocolate cupboard would be a good bet>

In reply to count:

All joking aside, when I was a kid my stepfather would go to the pub every Fri/Sat night then come home and beat the living daylights out of my mother, as soon as you heard the key in the door your heart would sink because you knew what was coming, I am filled with the same sense of dread when my wife walks in the door at that certain time of the month, she is never violent (I would never put up with that) but she is relentless in grinding myself and the children down, its the children I feel for, I can tell her to go f**k herself and walk out but the children have no escape and they don't understand.
I know my wife loves us all and we love her back, she's also the first to admit her problem and has tried everything and I do mean EVERYTHING but to no avail, she's 35 now god only knows what she's going to be like when she starts going through the change!!

In reply to blanchie14c:

Good you're on top of it all Blanchie .

I'll bear the Feminax & bitch be gone things in mind for the future , it could be very useful .

In reply to count: Ace, might try to suggest some of these potions at an appropriate time, wording will need to be spot on or the wrath could be extreme

In reply to count: Me: hey babe i was doing some reading an thought you might want to try one of these potions.

Her: WHAT, are you saying that im moody and unreasonable,

Me: not my words, but yes sometimes (try not to smile).

Her: so you also think im fat and ugly too,, slam door stomp feet

Me. thats not what i said babe, you know i think your gorgeous

Her: BUT THATS WHAT YOU MEANT THOUGH. (death stare that could kill)

Me. Ok ill leave you too it, am off to chop some fire wood.

Her. (thinking) thats it your going to suffer for days if not weeks hell hath no fury.

Me. Hey babe am going hill walking this weekend (2 weeks later)

Her. ARE YOU F*!k im going shopping an your going to do all those jobs youve been putting off for years.

Me, Damn, guess their are a few jobs,

Her, ha ha ha (evil voice) pay back is always sweeter when left for a while

Me, well lost that one, ill shut up next time and strategically stay out the house at certain times

In reply to count:

ill shut up next time and strategically stay out the house at certain times

What you need is a 'Red Alert Week Wall Planner'.

In reply to MJ:

You don't need a wall planner, there are apps that warn a man nowadays! (seriously)

In reply to count:

Couldn't you ask her to prove that's what you ment?

The best form of communication is no communicstion.

I always try to "placate the beast" by coming home from work with wee gifts. It is sometimes enough. After 10 years though you learn to not take it personally and know the madness will pass

In reply to Timmd: ye right

In reply to count:

Is this the first post that is not a troll but about a troll?

In reply to count:

Seems a bit unfair, but think Milesy might have a point actually. ()

In reply to blanchie14c:

You think they don't? That their armpits, legs and muffs are naturally that smooth?

In reply to blanchie14c:

Those are for stomach cramps, when menstruating, not pmt (the clue is in the name, pre-menstrual tension, before you actually bleed.)

In reply to tlm:

I'd be slightly concerned if she had to shave everyday though!

In reply to tlm:



In terms of things that help with PMT, there's a (scientifically unproven!) theory that Evening Primrose Oil/Starflower Oil/anything with gamma-linoleic acid in it can help. As can chocolate

To echo Caroline's post, I'd say that whilst it's horrible for everyone on the receiving end, it's also pretty horrible when it's happening to you. For me, it feels like a strap slowly tightening round my head, and all I want to do is hide under the duvet. If I'm doing more exercise, getting more sleep, I'm not stressed etc then it doesn't seem to affect me nearly so much.

In reply to leeangell:

I'd be slightly concerned if she had to shave everyday though!

If you shave your downstairs area, it's best to do it as often as is practical.

In reply to count:

Code Red from your nearest App Store!

In reply to leeangell:


they might keep it secret from you. My mate used to shave her belly every day, but I don't think she told many blokes that she did.

In reply to count: Reading this has made me realise (again) how lucky I am. Mrs S was always fantastic with her PMT, as soon as she clicked on that the reason for her mood wasn't logical she would become very aware of it and reign it in, often with a gentle warning to be nice as she might not be her usual angelic self.

She had to have a hysterectomy 4 years or so ago and whilst that has meant the end of PMT it has bought its own complications with the change and all that but through it all she has maintained the same way of dealing with things. In general she is very good at biting her tongue and defusing a situation and as soon as she realises that the issue is her hormones and not that the whole world is out to p*** her off she just bites a little harder.

We do occasionally bicker and very very rarely have full blown arguments but these are more likely to be my fault than hers (I'd say about 60/40 not sure if she'd agree).

In reply to spearing05:

Meanwhile back in the real world - joke by the way you lucky sod

E

In reply to count: Me and the misses have a bit of a bust up about once a month on average, and always at THAT time of the month..
M.

In reply to blanchie14c:

What mAkes you think we don't have to shave everyday!

In reply to waterbaby:You don't have to, do you? A friend lets her armpit hair grow.

(Not to underestimate the pressure women can feel to comform to percieved gender norms though.)

In reply to Timmd:

and neither do men - they can let their beards grow.

In reply to count: Not at all, we all know the cycle that a woman goes through, and this is no excuse to be horrible.

Best solution known to man.....the shed or garage.......go tinker with something mechanical, or make an excuse you have to go out to get a part for the car.....

If she blows up when you return, just be straight with her an tell her why you went out....she'll soon get the message..

In reply to tlm:I didn't know there was similar pressure on men not to have beards?

In reply to count:

Only 30% of women get PMT that leads to mood swings. I've never experienced it myself. I know this is true, because I checked with my husband and he said "No, dear" as he cowered behind the sofa.

In reply to Timmd:

It was pointed out earlier in the thread that women were lucky because they didn't have to shave every day. I said that many women did shave every day. Someone else said they didn't have to. So I replied that then men didn't have to either.

In reply to count:

So according to the majority of posts by men on this thread, most arguments between couples are caused by an unreasonable woman with PMT. I find this hard to believe. These men can't all be angels who never get stroppy. I've had to cope with stroppy/angry boyfriend all week (football related)

In reply to Enty: On the other hand she has absolutely no interest in climbing and absolutely refuses to learn to ski - something I'd love to do but adding another hobby that takes me away from her mostly on holidays is not a good idea.

She is good about me spending time away from her on my hobies but this only lasts as long as I don't take it too far. It would be very easy to get carried away with climbing and stuff and that is when a bad hormone day is most likely to show. In general so long as I remain considerate of her feelings and adjust my goals to take those into account things are fine. On the few occasions when they are not it is best not to argue as it won't get me anywhere other than wind her up more.

Every relationship has it's compromises and if that's putting up with a foul mood once a month then so long as the rest of it outweighs this then I guess whats the problem? No doubt there are bits about us blokes that our ladies would like to change so I guess fair is fair though perhaps never really having suffered the effects of full on monster PMT I'm being a little naive?

In reply to AgentStarling:

I must admit that I used to get really wound up by my dad. If I had a gruelling day, got a puncture on the way home, tore my trousers and got covered in oil and was a bit out of sorts, he used to say in a really understanding way "Is it that time of the month?"

"NO!!! I'VE JUST HAD A REALLY SHIT DAY!!!!"

In reply to spearing05:Somebody at my computer classes mentioned having things thrown at him along with words of abuse. It can't be fun for the woman involved either I don't suppose, though, i've never felt very cheery when i've given somebody abuse or (approx 2 or 3 times in my life) thrown anything at them.

In reply to tlm:

I wasn't being argumentative or unfriendly, it was a genuine post.

In reply to Timmd:

Neither was I? I just thought maybe you didn't realise why I had posted it?

In reply to AgentStarling:


How did you come to that conclusion? From the arguing/unreasonableness perspective, this thread has only been about PMT.

I'm trying to be accurate rather than pedantic. ()

In reply to count:
Q. How to find out which UKC women are suffering PMT this weekend??

A. Post something naughty and see which ones shout at you :-D

In reply to Timmd:

I came to that conclusion from reading about all the men above moaning about their other half, whilst not mentioning their own behaviour. I'm sure they have their grumpy moments too! I'm also not being very serious

In reply to count:
When Mrs Num Num begins to boil beetroots I normally hide. Mrs. Num Num gets her cudgel out and roams around the house looking for me saying 'cooey! Birdie dear' through gritted teeth.

In reply to AgentStarling:

That's cool. Wasn't sure which direction this thread would go. Sometimes one can feel found guilty just for being a man. ''But i'm a nice man'' ()

In reply to count: I don't think it's acceptable. I am pretty lucky - have few aches and pains during... Prone to crying at starving children in adverts...but apart from that all hunky dory. When I lived with a bunch of girls I would just shout back at the PMT bitches. Or take the piss... That will start fireworks. They know what it is and get over it. If they lord the fact that you are male and don't understand -tell them to do one! I have had some mates act atrociously in the past and have always told them off about it.

In reply to count: i take it you've tried offering red wine and chocolate on these occasions?

I think most women who suffer PMT know they can get a bit tetchy and snappy and are acutely aware of how horrible it can be to those around them and feel rotten about it, additionally, most blokes know that its not something that their other half chooses to go through and a bit of consideration and understanding go a long way in helping things. That said I don’t think personal insults, violence or acting like an utter bitch is really on at all and probably more to do with other personality failings that are using PMT as a Trojan horse to mask this fact.

In reply to count: There is a rote of mine at
Eagle Tor called PMT.Best tape up if you want to do it;
or there could be a lot of blood....
Problem is,access is now prohibited.

Mitch

In reply to count: On the less amusing side,I have been chased by a carving knife- wielding woman during her pmt.The gentler sex....

Mitch

In reply to blanchie14c:


Spring Equinox - good balance of yin and yang!

The best of luck to you - I MEAN IT - the best of luck :-/

BW

In reply to count:

This is an out of date joke - but its tenet still applies...
< What's the difference between Sadam Hussein and a woman with PMT?
< You can negotiate with Sadam Hussein!!!!!!!!!

In reply to count: Before widespread use of synthetic hormones daily, more often than not PMT used to arise with the full moon - hence the term lunatic.

Wiki has this to say: "Lunatic" is an informal term referring to people who are considered mentally ill, dangerous, foolish or unpredictable; conditions once called lunacy. The term may be considered insulting in serious contexts, though is sometimes used in friendly jest. The word derives from lunaticus meaning "of the moon" or "moonstruck".

BW

In reply to Baron Weasel:

Are you sure of this? Womens' cycles might be similar to that of the moon ie 28 days, but the timings don't coincide. Aren't you thinking of the tides which are influenced by the moon's gravitational pull? My experience of being on the receiving end of PMT induced rants bore no relation to the moon's cycle. However running aground unexpectedly once when with a gf was very much the fault of the moon (I'll never admit to poor navigation)!

In reply to count:

Is there any correlation between you calling her 'babe' and her trying to rip your head off? There would be in our house (daughter or wife).


I had a Canadian friend who had a special T shirt for that time of the month. It said "I've got PMT and a handgun, so BACK OFF!"

In reply to Steph-in-the-West:

I quite like,

How many women with PMT does it take to change a lightbulb?
Four.
Why does it?
It just does okay!!

I'm very thankfull not to get PMT.

In reply to count:

What's the difference between PMT and BSE?

One is "mad cow disease" and the other is some sort of agricultural problem..

I'll be off now, nearly finished working on the sound proof walls in the cellar.

In reply to Trangia:
I think you may be just measuring a womans cycle with the full moon but in reality a womans cycle should occur to coincide with the same moon state be that full, cresent on no moon. Rather like a broken watch still shows the right time twice a day. Good god man, imagine a womans cycle coinciding with the tides? thats twice a fricking day!!

I got chatting to a girl in a club and asked her if she wanted to come back to my place, she said "sorry but I'm on my menstral cycle" so I said "Thats ok, I'm on my Honda 90, you can follow me"

Old ones are the best...

In reply to blanchie14c:

heh - should? I know in biology they teach you all this 28 day stuff, but I don't know many women who are 28 days, regular as clock work. It's a little bit more random than that at times! In my life, I've had gaps of 3 months, I've had continuous spotting every day and just about everything in-between.

In reply to tlm: Yes I appreciate the cycles can be irratic at times. The mrs has no need for any contraception anymore <I had the snip> and her body is still settling down after years of having a coil

In reply to blanchie14c: Ahh you've bought it upon yourself:

"it [PMS] prompts females to reject infertile males (who cause PMS due to not impregnating the female). "... an infertile male/potentially fertile female partnership would tend to break down, thus allowing a new pair-bond to be formed. The greater the degree of premenstrual hostility of the female, the sooner a fertile mating could ensue."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Premenstrual_syndrome

FWIW my other half doesn't get PMT, rather she experiences "power surges" during which she is apparently able to see the world as it really is, and say it like it really is.

In reply to iksander:

That's quite funny! At times when I've been accused of being hormonal I have been known to respond with "No, you're ALWAYS annoying I just usually put up with it"

Fortunately I don't get bad PMT compared to a lot of people, and I usually recongnise it and say 'sorry, I'm due on so I'm feeling a bit short tempered'. If anyone thinks it's hard to live with as a man, you should try living with it as a woman. I spend about 3 days out of each month feeling like a teenager - angry, put-upon, unattractive and misunderstood. Those lowest times of the awful hormonal rampage which is puberty? Those are the feelings I have to re-experience once a month. It isn't pleasant.

In reply to Trangia:

No, not totally sure, but my wife said she coincided perfectly when she lived in the himalaya (5 years) and did not take the pill. I mention where she lived because her diet was a very simple vegatarian one and so can be sure that she was not affected by any hormones from meat...

BW

In reply to Baron Weasel: I always understood that if removed from outside influences, like agricultural hormones, synthetic hormones etc., we would all gradually fall into rhythm with the cycle of the moon - and therefore all experience PMT at the same time. Imagine the rampage!

In reply to Alyson:

It's what we used to call in our household a 'humma mumma' as in a teenager-mumbled 'hormone moment' to decsribe hormone-induced departure from acceptable behaviour

In reply to Alyson:

Have you heard the one about when the USAF was considering training women to be front line fast jet fighter pilots? There was a lot of concern amongst the top Brass that women couldn't be relied on to operate at full efficiency at that time of the month, so they decided to put it to the test and sent a handful of potential female fighter pilots to a Top Gun school were they were put through intensive tests monitoring their concentration, reactions and peformance.

At the end of the intensive 6 month testing period the results were presented to the Top Brass.

And, yes, the test results confirmed that at that time of the month the women's concentration, reaction times and performance was found to drop significantly to about the same level as those of male pilots....