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New dnf acronyms for amusing purposes

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 Furry Goose 12 Sep 2020

There are lots of acronyms for success on routes (OS, GU,  RP, F, FA etc) but few that represent the manner in which you failed at a route. So here's some I've come up with with the aim of making logbook comments more entertaining;

POFO: Pulled On, Fell Off

ALGOT: Accidently Let Go of Top,

BART: Bmc Accident Report Time,

LARA: Looked At, Ran Away.

Any more would be welcome.

 Cake 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

DAD: Did a Desmond (Dekker)

In reply to Furry Goose:

CNS - could not start! 

 Jon Stewart 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

TMTAFOH

Threw monumental trantrum and f*cked off home.

 outdoors.nick 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Fubar - F*cked Up; Broke Ankle.... Really

In reply to Furry Goose:

NALC

Never actually left café

 alan moore 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

PMP.

Wet my pants.

 Jim Nevill 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

THROTH - Too hard, ran off to Harrisons

 Andy Hardy 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

IWSIWSBIDWTF

I wouldn't say I was scared, but I didn't want to fart.

 Darron 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Andy Hardy:

> IWSIWSBIDWTF

> I wouldn't say I was scared, but I didn't want to fart.

Or oops!! For short.

Perhaps we need climbing emojis😊

 bouldery bits 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

FVK - Forgot Vital Kit

FFA - Faff Forced Abandonment 

 bouldery bits 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Somerset swede basher:

> CNS - could not start! 

CNFS

The F is for 'find'.

 Niall_H 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

SFoFP

Second Failed on First Pitch

 Hooo 12 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

WTHFGMHGOR

Way too hard for grade, must have gone off route.

 Michael Gordon 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

CAR - Cragfast, Awaiting Rescue

NAFSTFTGU - Not a Fail, Still Trying for the Ground-Up

 DaveHK 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Andy Hardy:

> IWSIWSBIDWTF

> I wouldn't say I was scared, but I didn't want to fart.

FTFO

Followed Through, Fell Off.

In reply to Furry Goose:

SM 

Shat myself

followed by

SFAT

Screamed for a toprope.

Just realised. That of course is followed by

SPLAT!

Post edited at 12:21
In reply to Niall_H:

> SFoFP

> Second Failed on First Pitch

What about:

FTGBFOTG

Failed to get both feet off the ground.

 john arran 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

WIMP: Would If More Pads

OP Furry Goose 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Good Work so far,

How about; HUBL: Hauled Up By Leader

In reply to Furry Goose:

An obscure one:

IIGOTCAITMBITB

If I ever get off this climb alive I'll throw my boots into the bin.

 djwilse 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

TROGS

Too Run Out, Got Scared.

NWTVS

No Way That’s VS

 Hooo 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

I've said that one a few times while on the route, but to be pedantic it's not used for a failed ascent. In those situations, failure would result in being unable to log the route at all.

 Raeanne 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

IHYWTFDYMMDT

"I HATE YOU, WHY THE F*** DO YOU MAKE ME DO THIS?". 

 Mike-W-99 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

POWP:Pulled on wrong pebble. Particularly apt on conglomerate routes.

In reply to Furry Goose:

Ok, a tease. I'm sure lots of people will get it immediately:

TPSIOE0

 climber34neil 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

Three pebble slab is only E0 ?

Or the peg snapped, I obviously ejected 

 d_b 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

SAH stayed at home

In reply to climber34neil:

> Three pebble slab is only E0 ?

Is 'correct'

In reply to d_b:

> SAH stayed at home

That's a variation on:

SIMPWAH

Stayed in my pit with a hangover.

 d_b 13 Sep 2020
In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

It's for those young whippersnappers who don't get proper hangovers yet.

 climber34neil 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

And another easy one

WHHEDOG ??

In reply to climber34neil:

Yup. But, being a southerner, true to my roots, I'd want to ask: WHHEDO south-east sandstone?

 McHeath 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

AARGH - Abseil anchor ripped, got hurt

 john arran 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Gordon Stainforth:

> An obscure one:

> IIGOTCAITMBITB

> If I ever get off this climb alive I'll throw my boots into the bin.

I can't help thinking that some of these "acronyms" don't roll off the tongue terribly easily!

 Andy Peak 1 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

D N S Did not start. 

 jdh90 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Tried Without Adequate Talent

 jdh90 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

I suppose that could also be:

Took Whipper At Top

But my first suggestion is more likely in my logbook.  Think I've written something to that effect on a few of my dnfs, adopting the acronym might save me some time in future.

 tlouth7 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

RATBAGS!

Repeatedly Attempted To Become Above Gear, Surrendered

BLIND

Bailed Lamely In Near Darkness

 McHeath 14 Sep 2020
In reply to john arran:

> I can't help thinking that some of these "acronyms" don't roll off the tongue terribly easily!

OK, two which should be easier:

FROGGATT: Fell, ripped out gear, grounded and trashed tibia

CURBAR: Chalked up, read beta, aided route

 tlouth7 14 Sep 2020
In reply to McHeath:

STONEY: Slab Turned Overhang, Necessitating Emergency Yanking

GRIT: Got Really, Incredibly, Terrified

FELT: Fecking Elvis Leg Travesty

 Cobra_Head 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Worked Ascent Negative Karma (WANK)

For a route which was hard work but turned out to be a disappointment.

In reply to McHeath:

KILNSEY

Knew I Lacked (the) Necessary Strength, Ended (up) Yo-yo-ing.

In reply to Furry Goose:

FAFF

Ffing 'Ard, Finally Fell

 d_b 14 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

SAD - Slipped And Decked

OP Furry Goose 14 Sep 2020
In reply to McHeath:

> FROGGATT: Fell, ripped out gear, grounded and trashed tibia

Except it was my Talus

In reply to Furry Goose:

VVV, vini vidi vamos - we came we saw we ran away

 jdh90 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Backed Off, Leaving Lots of Climbing Kit Sacrificially

 jdh90 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

TITTIS - Tied in then thought I shouldn't

 C Witter 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

BS
Basically Sent (yeh right)

FFS
Foot slipped

NonRon
As much as I shouted at them to "come on", my arms gave up


 

 jdh90 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

POCKETS

Presence of choss killed enthusiasm to solo

 LastBoyScout 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

TUGI - Took up golf instead

 Snyggapa 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

COLLAPSE : Caught one little look and preferred something else

In reply to Furry Goose:

FMP Filled My Pants

SMP Shat My Pants

 Alkis 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

TWAT: Took Whole Afternoon... Tw*t...

 jdh90 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

Terrific Until Random Downpour Started

 jdh90 15 Sep 2020
In reply to Furry Goose:

I thought of one which combined Total Sandbag with Climbed Until Nightfall, but thought it might be crossing the line from puerile into objectionable...

 Offwidth 15 Sep 2020
In reply to jdh90:

No CBA or JCBA?

No FSA or FSYA?

No BIRCHEN (bloody idiotic reach cheated, henceforth exceptionally normal)?

No BAMFORD (beautiful aimless meandering, failed on reaching destination)?


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