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hello all,
I've just been to hospital for something and they've had to attach something to me to earth me. This has never happened to me before.
and no, all you wags, it wasn't electroconvulsive therapy.
let's compile a list of strange medical procedures.
I've just been to hospital for something and they've had to attach something to me to earth me. This has never happened to me before.
and no, all you wags, it wasn't electroconvulsive therapy.
let's compile a list of strange medical procedures.
In reply to CJD:
Colonic Irrigation, now that is just plain weird ( as opposed to wired like your experience ).
Colonic Irrigation, now that is just plain weird ( as opposed to wired like your experience ).
In reply to John Rushby:
Womb With A View.
(Thangyew, thangyew... I'm here all week.)
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> It is in order to retune your coil to get Freeview.
>
> It is in order to retune your coil to get Freeview.
Womb With A View.
(Thangyew, thangyew... I'm here all week.)
In reply to CJD: I once had an EEG, which was fun. On a sunny Friday afternoon I went to a pleasant room in Oxford, where a nice young nurse attached electrodes to my head and body and then spent about 30 minutes stimulating bits of me.
Some people would pay for this, but the NHS did it for free...
T.
Some people would pay for this, but the NHS did it for free...
T.
In reply to KeithW: pmsl!
In reply to CJD:
A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
Being of the fairer sex you may not appreciate the implications, but it made my eyes water just thinking about it.
A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
Being of the fairer sex you may not appreciate the implications, but it made my eyes water just thinking about it.
In reply to El Cap:
no no, this happened to my big bro years and years ago when he was being a tart, and he told me when I was working on the switchboard of a large cathedral. I had to keep a straight face as the Dean shuffled by with lots of Canons... :-S lol
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
>
> Being of the fairer sex you may not appreciate the implications, but it made my eyes water just thinking about it.
>
> A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
>
> Being of the fairer sex you may not appreciate the implications, but it made my eyes water just thinking about it.
no no, this happened to my big bro years and years ago when he was being a tart, and he told me when I was working on the switchboard of a large cathedral. I had to keep a straight face as the Dean shuffled by with lots of Canons... :-S lol
In reply to CJD:
You’re a robot aren’t you? I always wondered how you managed to post so much! Is this CJD v2.0 sp2 that we’re speaking to now?
You’re a robot aren’t you? I always wondered how you managed to post so much! Is this CJD v2.0 sp2 that we’re speaking to now?
In reply to CJD:
I like cholecystoduodenostomy. Sounds clever. As does neoureterocystotomy. However, its the plastic surgeons that get all the fun. Tubed pedicle grafting involves making a 'bucket-handle' of skin on the shoulder and walking it over 12 to 24 weeks along the arm or body to replace a skin deficit. Just weird!
I like cholecystoduodenostomy. Sounds clever. As does neoureterocystotomy. However, its the plastic surgeons that get all the fun. Tubed pedicle grafting involves making a 'bucket-handle' of skin on the shoulder and walking it over 12 to 24 weeks along the arm or body to replace a skin deficit. Just weird!
In reply to CJD:
Smear tests. Lovely little procedure, not.
Smear tests. Lovely little procedure, not.
In reply to Flying Monkey:
what about having coils fitted? or ones that have fused to you, removed without anaesthetic? mmmmm.
oh and dental syringes into the neck of your womb. mmmmm again.
bring it on!
what about having coils fitted? or ones that have fused to you, removed without anaesthetic? mmmmm.
oh and dental syringes into the neck of your womb. mmmmm again.
bring it on!
In reply to CJD:
I'm going to exercise a bit of 'foresight' and predict that someone will mention umbrellas at some point on this thread.
I'm going to exercise a bit of 'foresight' and predict that someone will mention umbrellas at some point on this thread.
In reply to John Rushby:
Love springs internal!
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> It is in order to retune your coil to get Freeview.
>
> It is in order to retune your coil to get Freeview.
Love springs internal!
In reply to DougG:
Sorry, you're a bit late - see my earlier post
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> I'm going to exercise a bit of 'foresight' and predict that someone will mention umbrellas at some point on this thread.
>
> I'm going to exercise a bit of 'foresight' and predict that someone will mention umbrellas at some point on this thread.
Sorry, you're a bit late - see my earlier post
In reply to CJD:
> oh and dental syringes into the neck of your womb. mmmmm again.
>
Funny place to keep your teeth.
>
In reply to CJD:
Are you positive?
> I've just been to hospital for something and they've had to attach something to me to earth me. This has never happened to me before.
Are you positive?
In reply to CJD:
They're actually aliens in disguise and they're analysing you to see whether you're worth abducting. Since you're still here, the answer would appear to be no.
They're actually aliens in disguise and they're analysing you to see whether you're worth abducting. Since you're still here, the answer would appear to be no.
In reply to DougG:
LOL !
Actually, was there any oxygen involved ( I mean pure oxygen, not the 21 ish % in the atmosphere ) ? If so, it was probably a precaution. Pure oxygen and static sparks are not good bed-fellows.
LOL !
Actually, was there any oxygen involved ( I mean pure oxygen, not the 21 ish % in the atmosphere ) ? If so, it was probably a precaution. Pure oxygen and static sparks are not good bed-fellows.
In reply to CJD:
What's the current diagnosis?
Did you just let them do it or did you put up any resistance?
What's the current diagnosis?
Did you just let them do it or did you put up any resistance?
In reply to the pulsing motorik of Neu!:
you can follow DougG.
close the door on your way out, there's a love!
you can follow DougG.
close the door on your way out, there's a love!
In reply to CJD:
Thats probably for the best. You've never been the brightest spark.
> (In reply to Flying Monkey)
>
> why not? they're great once they're in. nothing to have to remember!
>
> why not? they're great once they're in. nothing to have to remember!
Thats probably for the best. You've never been the brightest spark.
In reply to Flying Monkey:
or an ignition coil in CJDs case...
> (In reply to CJD)
> :S
>
> I'm never going near a coil
> :S
>
> I'm never going near a coil
or an ignition coil in CJDs case...
In reply to CJD:
So have I been discharged? Can I go ohm?
>
> you can follow DougG.
>
> close the door on your way out, there's a love!
> you can follow DougG.
>
> close the door on your way out, there's a love!
So have I been discharged? Can I go ohm?
In reply to CJD: i was always convinced some DIY guy spent 2 hrs in my right arm with a drill and some standard tools.
i saw the x-rays and the screws they've used to bolt the metal plates to my bone look like summat you'd put up a shelf with,,
but then it did work,,,
i saw the x-rays and the screws they've used to bolt the metal plates to my bone look like summat you'd put up a shelf with,,
but then it did work,,,
In reply to CJD:
aye, positive would have been a shock for you
> (In reply to JimR)
> [...]
>
> negative!
> [...]
>
> negative!
aye, positive would have been a shock for you
In reply to CJD:
Portable EEG - skull connected to a myriad of multi-coloured wires, hanging down like flouro dreads and connected to a walkman.
All very sci-fi.
Portable EEG - skull connected to a myriad of multi-coloured wires, hanging down like flouro dreads and connected to a walkman.
All very sci-fi.
In reply to martin riddell:
um...
or should that be ohm...?
what can I say, Martin, but that you bring out the positive in me.
<cough>
um...
or should that be ohm...?
what can I say, Martin, but that you bring out the positive in me.
<cough>
In reply to JimR:
Well, what man or woman could resistor...
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> You've gone AC/DC?
>
> You've gone AC/DC?
Well, what man or woman could resistor...
In reply to El Cap:
Unfortunately this is a bit of an urban myth! The swabs they use in STD clinics are more like cotton buds...
Unless things have changed since my training!
Ade
> (In reply to CJD)
>
> A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
>
>
> A mate of mine ( yes honestly, it wasn't me ) caught a dose of clap many years back. Apparently the treatment involved inserting what is best described as a miniature umbrella up his jap's eye, opening it up and pulling it out again.
>
Unfortunately this is a bit of an urban myth! The swabs they use in STD clinics are more like cotton buds...
Unless things have changed since my training!
Ade
In reply to soveda@work:
They just feel like an umbrella..
..or so I'm told.
> (In reply to El Cap)
> [...]
>
>
> Unfortunately this is a bit of an urban myth! The swabs they use in STD clinics are more like cotton buds...
> [...]
>
>
> Unfortunately this is a bit of an urban myth! The swabs they use in STD clinics are more like cotton buds...
They just feel like an umbrella..
..or so I'm told.
In reply to Ridge:
Probably because if you do have an STI the urethra is likely to be very inflamed and painful anyway. Mind you I'm not sure that a cotton bud is terribly soft anyway!
Ade
> (In reply to soveda@work)
> [...]
>
> They just feel like an umbrella..
> [...]
>
> They just feel like an umbrella..
Probably because if you do have an STI the urethra is likely to be very inflamed and painful anyway. Mind you I'm not sure that a cotton bud is terribly soft anyway!
Ade
In reply to CJD:
I thought you didn't like talking about camera gear, just go out and shoot was more your thing :-D
> (In reply to El Cap)
> [...]
>
>
> no no, this happened to my big bro years and years ago when he was being a tart, and he told me when I was working on the switchboard of a large cathedral. I had to keep a straight face as the Dean shuffled by with lots of Canons... :-S lol
> [...]
>
>
> no no, this happened to my big bro years and years ago when he was being a tart, and he told me when I was working on the switchboard of a large cathedral. I had to keep a straight face as the Dean shuffled by with lots of Canons... :-S lol
I thought you didn't like talking about camera gear, just go out and shoot was more your thing :-D
In reply to CJD:
Did the earth move for you?
> what can I say, Martin, but that you bring out the positive in me.
> <cough>
> <cough>
Did the earth move for you?
In reply to soveda@work:
My understanding from my nursing training in the early sixties was that the 'umbrella' was used many many moons ago before more modern methods were brought in to take pity on the poor suffering male members of society.
My understanding from my nursing training in the early sixties was that the 'umbrella' was used many many moons ago before more modern methods were brought in to take pity on the poor suffering male members of society.
In reply to CJD:
I had a tympanoplasty a few years back (No, really). But i don't like beating ny own drum....
I had a tympanoplasty a few years back (No, really). But i don't like beating ny own drum....
In reply to CJD: if you have had a procedure that requires electrocautery (this electrically heat seals the vessels that have been cut when making the incision, and stops you from bleeding)then for safety you have to have a 'return plate' and lead attached to you, so as to return the electricity back to the machine. these are the machines i use at my hospital. www.valleylab.com/product/es/index.html
In reply to CJD: Endoscopic Retrograde Choledochopancreatography
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