Hi Phil
> I use a retraced figure of 8 with about 4 or 5 locking knots, I was taught to do this knot with 2 locking knots but feel like 5 is better!
As others have said, tying your not in a consistent and neat manner will give you faith in the knot (concentrate on that rather than excessive stopper knots, and partner checking will help further. If you're still struggling, then weighting the rope a few metres off the ground might give you that little bit extra confidence.
> Its strange because I'm not affair of the height I just don't feel safe, its like I'm climbing with no gear.
Falling practice is the best thing to get your head sorted, and positive reinforcement is the key (don't do anything you're not happy with, or it will do more harm then good). Start small, i.e. on top rope and just let go. Begin with no slack, and then (from the same hold) get your belayer to pay out increasing amounts of slack. (I tend to build up in ~10-20cm amounts of slack. That way the climber/faller can practice falling safely (there's a good technique video on here
http://www.ukclimbing.com/videos/play.php?i=52). Good communication between climber and belayer here are key (both clear on the ammount of slack/size of fall). Knowing your belayer can and has caught you on an xcm or xm fall will give you more confidence when climbing.
If you do get around to leading, then clip drop is definately the way to go. I'd start as above, i.e. fall off below the clip, then build up to what you're comfortable with on lead. Again the key is positive reinforcement, you need to overcome your (very healthy and natural) fear of falling. Personally, my bottle only extends to deliberatley falling with the clip at knee height, but have taken falls of 5-6 metres on lead, a which have felt fine (been positive falling experiences).
Whether on top rope or lead, once you're comfortable with 'planned falls' then move on to "climbing till you fall."
The easiest way I've found is to get a safe distance off the ground, and then switch to a route at or above your limit (preferably on an overhang) and climb until you fall off. Or manage to accidentally push your grade
The trick thing is stopping yourself grabbin holds on easier route.... climbing quickly can help with this