This topic has been archived, and won't accept reply postings.
Well, here's a difficult one, and where else to get a wide range of opinions than UKC.
After several years of no real climbing, I find I am missing it too much, and have an overwhelming need to get back out there on a regular basis - I miss it so much!!!
However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
I am in somewhat of a turmoil, as however much I love my wife, I feel that there is a huge part of me missing, which can only be made whole, by starting climbing seriously again.
I don't want to be a selfish sod, or loose the woman I love, but I miss serious climbing so much, and don't think I can spend the rest of my life without climbing being an important part of it - I still have dreams and ambitions in the mountains.
Am I being a selfish bastard, or am I at risk of compromising who I really am?
Or should I just be thankful for the adventures I have enjoyed in the mountains so far, and get over myself?
After several years of no real climbing, I find I am missing it too much, and have an overwhelming need to get back out there on a regular basis - I miss it so much!!!
However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
I am in somewhat of a turmoil, as however much I love my wife, I feel that there is a huge part of me missing, which can only be made whole, by starting climbing seriously again.
I don't want to be a selfish sod, or loose the woman I love, but I miss serious climbing so much, and don't think I can spend the rest of my life without climbing being an important part of it - I still have dreams and ambitions in the mountains.
Am I being a selfish bastard, or am I at risk of compromising who I really am?
Or should I just be thankful for the adventures I have enjoyed in the mountains so far, and get over myself?
In reply to Bobling: She doesn't want to be parted from me for any length of time, and doesn't want to go to my funeral!
In reply to Goucho: she's the one being selfish.
Are her objections from a safety point of view or does she not want you doing something that doesn't involve her?
I must admit I find it hard to juggle the two sometimes, especially when the waether is like this.
it takes compromise and understanding from both points of view .
Are her objections from a safety point of view or does she not want you doing something that doesn't involve her?
I must admit I find it hard to juggle the two sometimes, especially when the waether is like this.
it takes compromise and understanding from both points of view .
In reply to higherclimbingwales: Trouble is, she married a man who used to climb, not one who still does - so am I being the selfish one?
In reply to Goucho: not at all. would she have the same objection if it was another lifestyle (climbing is a lifestyle after all!)?
In reply to Goucho:
She sounds nuts, you know the ropes (see what I did there?!) Move on... Do you get loyalty points with the solicitor?
She sounds nuts, you know the ropes (see what I did there?!) Move on... Do you get loyalty points with the solicitor?
In reply to higherclimbingwales: I think it's the risk element - buried too many friends to disagree with that one.
I just feel, that I haven't been open and honest, though in my defence, it's only recently that I've realised How much I miss climbing.
I just feel, that I haven't been open and honest, though in my defence, it's only recently that I've realised How much I miss climbing.
In reply to Goucho:
Could you not scratch your itch with less serious family friendly climbing? Cragging and easy mountain days?
Could you not scratch your itch with less serious family friendly climbing? Cragging and easy mountain days?
In reply to Goucho: ask her if she'd have objections to you going to horse riding lessons instead.
I suspect you already know how safe climbing actually is if you know what you're doing, which I believe you do.
you need to reach some middle ground on this as unless you have plans to climb Indian Face or similar she really has nothing to fear!
I suspect you already know how safe climbing actually is if you know what you're doing, which I believe you do.
you need to reach some middle ground on this as unless you have plans to climb Indian Face or similar she really has nothing to fear!
In reply to Bobling: Unfortunately, I've done too much of the big stuff to be able to settle for 'easy days' out.
As I said as I get older, I've started to realise how many ambitions I still have - especially in the greater ranges.
I think I may have got myself in a bit of a difficult unprotected crux - again...lol
As I said as I get older, I've started to realise how many ambitions I still have - especially in the greater ranges.
I think I may have got myself in a bit of a difficult unprotected crux - again...lol
In reply to higherclimbingwales: Unfortunately, I have an itch for things never taken advantage of when I was a regular climber - the greater ranges....yes possibly the Himalayas!!!!!
In reply to Goucho:
climbing v wife: no contest. No woman is that good.............looks like you just made your 4th mistake mate
climbing v wife: no contest. No woman is that good.............looks like you just made your 4th mistake mate
In reply to top cat: Unfortunately, Mrs Goucho is a seriously wonderful woman, not to mention being just a bit on the hot side
If only I'd married a climber first time around - putting up with the beard may have been a price worth paying..lol
If only I'd married a climber first time around - putting up with the beard may have been a price worth paying..lol
In reply to Goucho: Its far easier to ask for forgivness than permission. Go climbing!
In reply to Howardw1968: I stopped serious climbing several years ago, thought I'd moved on, unfortunately I obviously haven't.
In reply to Goucho:
Good luck then! My Mrs says that if I had a different family/upbringing I'd have been a hardcore outdoors person! Having discovered various outdoors things through encouraging our daughter!
Think yo need to show her how safe your being in your climbing no 65ft bouldering!
Good luck then! My Mrs says that if I had a different family/upbringing I'd have been a hardcore outdoors person! Having discovered various outdoors things through encouraging our daughter!
Think yo need to show her how safe your being in your climbing no 65ft bouldering!
In reply to Howardw1968: It's the 65' bouldering that gets me half hard and playful
In reply to Goucho:
You can't build a relationship on self-sacrifice. Just doesn't work.
Explain to her it really matters to you and you don't want to lose that part of your life.
How she reacts is up to her. I know nothing about her, obviously. But on the slender basis of what you've said, I can't see why she'd refuse to let you climb. Everyone needs to do their thing.
I hope this last remark isn't relevant to your situation, but it could be: I'm afraid there are people out there who like controlling other people.
You can't build a relationship on self-sacrifice. Just doesn't work.
Explain to her it really matters to you and you don't want to lose that part of your life.
How she reacts is up to her. I know nothing about her, obviously. But on the slender basis of what you've said, I can't see why she'd refuse to let you climb. Everyone needs to do their thing.
I hope this last remark isn't relevant to your situation, but it could be: I'm afraid there are people out there who like controlling other people.
In reply to Goucho:
Take her climbing to show her why you like it and how safe it is.
Then drop her (for legal reasons this is to be considered a joke)
Take her climbing to show her why you like it and how safe it is.
Then drop her (for legal reasons this is to be considered a joke)
In reply to Tim Chappell: Unfortunately, a rather drunken night when old climbing friends came to stay a few days ago, developed into the usual trip down 'epic' memory lane, followed by memories of absent friends, which is hardly comforting!!!!
I just think I'm being selfish, but I can't help but yearn for the mountains.
I just think I'm being selfish, but I can't help but yearn for the mountains.
In reply to Goucho: Most people don't have the courage of their convictions. Most people intuitively oppose change, even when the status quo is woefully lacking. Seems like you know what you want to do, you know you need change, but at the same time you fear it.
A change can make for an uncertain future but not to do so would consign you to mediocrity and an old age dogged by regret at the chances you did not take. Seize the day with both hands, cash off your shackles and become climber you are meant to be.
More succinctly: Get back into climbing of you will regret it.
NB. I could be wrong... but it's a pretty rare occurence
A change can make for an uncertain future but not to do so would consign you to mediocrity and an old age dogged by regret at the chances you did not take. Seize the day with both hands, cash off your shackles and become climber you are meant to be.
More succinctly: Get back into climbing of you will regret it.
NB. I could be wrong... but it's a pretty rare occurence
In reply to Goucho:
What does your profile say? Retired from climbing but like to get out now and again. That pretty much answers your question.
In my eyes, you're being totally selfish. Is climbing more important than your wife if so, then you need to sort your life out. To me it says you don't think a massive amount about your wife and your relationship if you're not willing to let go such a transient part of your life and all the muppets above who say otherwise, need to get a life. It's only climbing for gods sake.
Probably harsh but the only important thing in life is people.
What does your profile say? Retired from climbing but like to get out now and again. That pretty much answers your question.
In my eyes, you're being totally selfish. Is climbing more important than your wife if so, then you need to sort your life out. To me it says you don't think a massive amount about your wife and your relationship if you're not willing to let go such a transient part of your life and all the muppets above who say otherwise, need to get a life. It's only climbing for gods sake.
Probably harsh but the only important thing in life is people.
In reply to Goucho:
wife number 4 sounds a bit possesive to me ,the "crux" of the matter is shes probably more worried youll bugger off with some hot female climber .your track record isnt good.
she doesnt own you anymore than you own her .try and hit some middle ground ,and keep the peace.the love of a good woman is very important.
wife number 4 sounds a bit possesive to me ,the "crux" of the matter is shes probably more worried youll bugger off with some hot female climber .your track record isnt good.
she doesnt own you anymore than you own her .try and hit some middle ground ,and keep the peace.the love of a good woman is very important.
In reply to Goucho:
It's quite simple really. Would you drive 12 hours, to MAYBE spend a day or two with a woman, knowing that it would be hard work the entire time you were with her, and there's a real possibility that she would kill you at any moment? Of course not, no woman is worth that.
Now if that were a route...
It's quite simple really. Would you drive 12 hours, to MAYBE spend a day or two with a woman, knowing that it would be hard work the entire time you were with her, and there's a real possibility that she would kill you at any moment? Of course not, no woman is worth that.
Now if that were a route...
In reply to Goucho: talk to her, take her to a crag with climb buddy and explain all the safety stuff and if that fails look for No 5.
In reply to Goucho:
And if you defy her wishes, what then? Or if you are not true to your own needs, what then?
Sounds to me that you've made mistake no 4.
Why did you get married again?
> >
> However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
>
> However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
>
And if you defy her wishes, what then? Or if you are not true to your own needs, what then?
Sounds to me that you've made mistake no 4.
Why did you get married again?
In reply to Goucho: Ditch the climbing and perhaps do more scarmbling and take her along/get her involved. Seems a bit unreasonable though if its what you want to do. What's a marriage all about if it isn't about compromise on both sides?
In reply to Goucho: As others have said, take her on some easy days out, avoid high/'dangerous' crags, just go for fun. (Hopefully the weather will oblige.
If after 6 months you still cannot agree, well there's always wife 5.
If after 6 months you still cannot agree, well there's always wife 5.
In reply to Goucho: climbing is not good enough to loose a wife you obviously like.
climbing is only a hobby,cant do with this lifestyle bollocks.
id find something else that gives you the same buzz,plus rocks cant give you a b.j
climbing is only a hobby,cant do with this lifestyle bollocks.
id find something else that gives you the same buzz,plus rocks cant give you a b.j
In reply to mark s:
Don't really know what to say about this.
E
> (In reply to Goucho) climbing is not good enough to loose a wife you obviously like.
> climbing is only a hobby,cant do with this lifestyle bollocks.
> id find something else that gives you the same buzz,plus rocks cant give you a b.j
> climbing is only a hobby,cant do with this lifestyle bollocks.
> id find something else that gives you the same buzz,plus rocks cant give you a b.j
Don't really know what to say about this.
E
In reply to Enty:
I suppose it could be said that there is more to marriage than bj's?
> (In reply to mark s)
> [...]
>
> Don't really know what to say about this.
>
> E
> [...]
>
> Don't really know what to say about this.
>
> E
I suppose it could be said that there is more to marriage than bj's?
In reply to Goucho: just get over yourself...just one's opinion..and good luck..
In reply to Goucho: climbing vs wife? there is nothing in my life that i would choose over my wife. I miss many things, but I will always have the memories
Could you take her to an indoor wall? Even if it is just for bouldering, she may begin to understand what it is about
Could you take her to an indoor wall? Even if it is just for bouldering, she may begin to understand what it is about
In reply to Goucho:
I was going to dive into this thread and say get rid!! There's no woman on earth who I would put before my climbing ambitions. This should always be sorted in the early stages of a relationship. To the guy above who doesn't get the lifestyle stuff - it's you who needs another hobby
Then I looked at your profile and you've already been about a bit. Quite impressive, E6, Salathe, Walker Spur etc etc.
And you're 54. (If you were 24 without that ticklist it would definitely be get shut.)
So with a woman you love and who is hot! (can't be many of those available to men in their mid 50's)
So compromise is the answer. Don't know how but try to work round it.
Makes me feel good knowing that I have Mrs. Ent who helped and encouraged me to go to Yosemite on my own for 3 weeks last year to acheive one of my ambitions.
I also agrre with Tim - you can't build a relationship on self sacrifice.
Good luck.
E
I was going to dive into this thread and say get rid!! There's no woman on earth who I would put before my climbing ambitions. This should always be sorted in the early stages of a relationship. To the guy above who doesn't get the lifestyle stuff - it's you who needs another hobby
Then I looked at your profile and you've already been about a bit. Quite impressive, E6, Salathe, Walker Spur etc etc.
And you're 54. (If you were 24 without that ticklist it would definitely be get shut.)
So with a woman you love and who is hot! (can't be many of those available to men in their mid 50's)
So compromise is the answer. Don't know how but try to work round it.
Makes me feel good knowing that I have Mrs. Ent who helped and encouraged me to go to Yosemite on my own for 3 weeks last year to acheive one of my ambitions.
I also agrre with Tim - you can't build a relationship on self sacrifice.
Good luck.
E
In reply to Goucho:
From what you say, the thing you miss is not the movement over rock, because this can be done in an afternoon or evening, and can be made about as safe as any other human activity can be made safe.
What it sounds like is that you are missing multi-day trips into big mountainous places.
Am I right?
If so, that is quite a different situation.
Ask yourself if you want to do multi-day rock/ice climbs, or do you just like being in hte wild places far from the nearest road? If it is the latter, you can do this without having stupid risks. There are places in the Himalayas and Andes which are accessible by walking, remote, and get few (if any) visitors. You could invite your wife on a trip like this, if she is not into the technicalities of climbing.
From what you say, the thing you miss is not the movement over rock, because this can be done in an afternoon or evening, and can be made about as safe as any other human activity can be made safe.
What it sounds like is that you are missing multi-day trips into big mountainous places.
Am I right?
If so, that is quite a different situation.
Ask yourself if you want to do multi-day rock/ice climbs, or do you just like being in hte wild places far from the nearest road? If it is the latter, you can do this without having stupid risks. There are places in the Himalayas and Andes which are accessible by walking, remote, and get few (if any) visitors. You could invite your wife on a trip like this, if she is not into the technicalities of climbing.
In reply to Goucho:
Have you talked to here about it? What is it that she is afraid of?
Have you talked to here about it? What is it that she is afraid of?
In reply to Duncan Bourne: Your partner should be the person that helps you become, or at least supports you in becoming, all you can be, so that you can achieve your dreams. find a balance - after all the above works both ways - get some bloody good life insurance, consider where you would compromise (would she be happier if you tackled some big mountain with a guide for example). relationships are about compromise not sacrifice.
In reply to Goucho:
If you can't persuade her to change her mind and want to return to climbing you've got to start lying
Tell her you're playing golf/fishing/base jumping instead. Keep your gear at a mates house. Wash the chalk off before getting home. Cover your tracks
Or:
Ditch her and look for no.5
Or:
Don't ever go climbing again (you pussy whipped little biatch)
If you can't persuade her to change her mind and want to return to climbing you've got to start lying
Tell her you're playing golf/fishing/base jumping instead. Keep your gear at a mates house. Wash the chalk off before getting home. Cover your tracks
Or:
Ditch her and look for no.5
Or:
Don't ever go climbing again (you pussy whipped little biatch)
In reply to Goucho:
kill her, cremate her then use her ashes as a chalk substitute and she will always be a part of your climbing.
Untill your chalk/ashes run out obviously then you will have to find a new wife and do the same again.
Problem solved.
kill her, cremate her then use her ashes as a chalk substitute and she will always be a part of your climbing.
Untill your chalk/ashes run out obviously then you will have to find a new wife and do the same again.
Problem solved.
In reply to Goucho: she is the one being selfish, she can not make you not do something that you've obviously got a lot of passion for. Obviously it would be hard for her while you're out climbing but that's just something she has to deal with. If you don't get back into the serious stuff because of her you're just going to end up resenting her.
For me its a no-brainer, do the stuff you want to do, its up to her how she reacts to that.
For me its a no-brainer, do the stuff you want to do, its up to her how she reacts to that.
In reply to Goucho: Climb!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In reply to Goucho: In the possibly vain hope of supplying something a little bit original to this thread this is what I have to say -
If you started this thread, asking a very large community of committed climbers whether you should go climbing or not, I think you already knew what the answer would be.
Knowing that, I think you were not looking so much for an answer to the question, so much as validation for doing what you were already going to do. I will also take it for granted that this lady is the love of your life and not just someone you want to 'get rid of' or it wouldn't be a problem in the first place.
You were obviously a very good (and bold) climber before you threw it in, and just seeing a couple of the routes on your logbook I can make a pretty reasonable assumption that you have had a damned good taste of many of the wide and varied pleasures climbing has to offer.
Those experiences will always be with you, providing intense, profound and enjoyable memories for the rest of your life. You can also make new ones, and there is every chance they will be just as good or maybe even better. We all know that climbing is not like most other sports, it involves you in a way that others can not.
The craving for that will not go away. It may subside for a time but it will not go away. And if you do not go climbing, you will be resenting her for not letting you go climbing. And if you do go you will feel guilty for going against her will.
I say you need to go climbing, and it needs to be with her blessing. Whether that means making a few compromises on which routes you do, or doing something for her in return, or granting her some other liberty is all for you to work out. All of these options are better than the two obvious ones.
If you really love each other, you can work it out. Good luck!
If you started this thread, asking a very large community of committed climbers whether you should go climbing or not, I think you already knew what the answer would be.
Knowing that, I think you were not looking so much for an answer to the question, so much as validation for doing what you were already going to do. I will also take it for granted that this lady is the love of your life and not just someone you want to 'get rid of' or it wouldn't be a problem in the first place.
You were obviously a very good (and bold) climber before you threw it in, and just seeing a couple of the routes on your logbook I can make a pretty reasonable assumption that you have had a damned good taste of many of the wide and varied pleasures climbing has to offer.
Those experiences will always be with you, providing intense, profound and enjoyable memories for the rest of your life. You can also make new ones, and there is every chance they will be just as good or maybe even better. We all know that climbing is not like most other sports, it involves you in a way that others can not.
The craving for that will not go away. It may subside for a time but it will not go away. And if you do not go climbing, you will be resenting her for not letting you go climbing. And if you do go you will feel guilty for going against her will.
I say you need to go climbing, and it needs to be with her blessing. Whether that means making a few compromises on which routes you do, or doing something for her in return, or granting her some other liberty is all for you to work out. All of these options are better than the two obvious ones.
If you really love each other, you can work it out. Good luck!
In reply to rock gobbler:I Agree With the post above. Also you need to do crafty training so that when you do get opportunity you can maximize. I get up and train before work 5 days a week.and Im married with kids!
In reply to Goucho:
Have been thinking about this thread a bit and For me I dont think my wife minds what I do but she does mind about how much it costs!
Have been thinking about this thread a bit and For me I dont think my wife minds what I do but she does mind about how much it costs!
In reply to Enty: Enty, I love ya man!
Thanks for pointing out the blindingly obvious, to a middle-aged man who should know better, and putting everything into perspective.
You're right, I have had a good run for my money climbing, and the chances of me getting anywhere near that level again is somewhat unrealistic - and probably even greedy.
So as I really don't want to loose the woman I love, a compromise has been found.
I'm going to get into this sport climbing lark, and also more challenges on the bike (lets be honest I've got enough brilliant venues for both on my doorstep)
So, I'm going to start hitting those big rides (done 4 etape's, so should manage it) and go and get a new rack of quick draws.
As for the big mountain stuff, well I'm going to get into ski-mountaineering, which should provide the right mix of adventure, adrenalin, and an acceptable level of risk - at my age, it will probably just be glorified off-piste
Hopefully, mid life wobble averted.
Thanks.
Gouch
Thanks for pointing out the blindingly obvious, to a middle-aged man who should know better, and putting everything into perspective.
You're right, I have had a good run for my money climbing, and the chances of me getting anywhere near that level again is somewhat unrealistic - and probably even greedy.
So as I really don't want to loose the woman I love, a compromise has been found.
I'm going to get into this sport climbing lark, and also more challenges on the bike (lets be honest I've got enough brilliant venues for both on my doorstep)
So, I'm going to start hitting those big rides (done 4 etape's, so should manage it) and go and get a new rack of quick draws.
As for the big mountain stuff, well I'm going to get into ski-mountaineering, which should provide the right mix of adventure, adrenalin, and an acceptable level of risk - at my age, it will probably just be glorified off-piste
Hopefully, mid life wobble averted.
Thanks.
Gouch
In reply to rock gobbler: See post to Enty, as you also made very good and similar comments.
Thanks.
Gouch.
Thanks.
Gouch.
In reply to Goucho: bolt clipping really aint so bad you know!
good luck with everything I hope it works out
good luck with everything I hope it works out
In reply to Goucho:
did you mean Glorified Apres ski she can join in with
> (In reply to Enty)
>>
it will probably just be glorified off-piste >
>
>
did you mean Glorified Apres ski she can join in with
In reply to Goucho: Mountain biking and off-piste skiing. I would suggest that both of these are more hazardous than climbing especially sport climbing. I have had more knocks and bumps with mountain biking than I've ever had climbing (I even managed to demolish a helmet) and some of them could have put me out of action. And as for off-piste skiing, have you never heard of avalanches?
Best of luck. I married the right one first time, she is very understanding, despite on a couple of occasions thinking that I had been killed climbing.
Al
Best of luck. I married the right one first time, she is very understanding, despite on a couple of occasions thinking that I had been killed climbing.
Al
In reply to Gaston Rubberpants: Road Biking Al - did mountain biking for a bit, but broke my collar bone and cracked 4 ribs in a spectacular crash when ambition was sorely let down by lack of talent
As for off-piste skiing, I've been doing it for many years, so have a good base on which to combine it with my mountaineering experience.
Gouch.
As for off-piste skiing, I've been doing it for many years, so have a good base on which to combine it with my mountaineering experience.
Gouch.
In reply to Howardw1968: She calls it Apres ski, I call it shopping
In reply to rock gobbler: Thanks
In reply to Goucho:
The bitter truth is that you've married the wrong wife. A hint for the next marriage: you need to replace "climbing versus wife" with "climbing with wife". It won't be the ideal marriage (none of my previous two similar marriages were close to ideal...) but at least you get a reliable climbing partner
The bitter truth is that you've married the wrong wife. A hint for the next marriage: you need to replace "climbing versus wife" with "climbing with wife". It won't be the ideal marriage (none of my previous two similar marriages were close to ideal...) but at least you get a reliable climbing partner
In reply to Šljiva:
Exactly and to find that balance you need to have a dialogue and thrash out what the issues are rather than just guessing at them.
>relationships are about compromise not sacrifice.
Not always sometimes they are about having fun together
> (In reply to Duncan Bourne) find a balance - after all the above works both ways
Exactly and to find that balance you need to have a dialogue and thrash out what the issues are rather than just guessing at them.
>relationships are about compromise not sacrifice.
Not always sometimes they are about having fun together
In reply to Goucho:
Difficult one. I feel some sympathy. My wife (of 22 years), I courted mostly in hospital. She actually met my parent in intensive care with me in a coma. Her and my mom actually threw all my climbing gear away while I was in hospital.
I didn't climb for many years, but always missed it. Started again with no.1 son a few years ago. Wife wasn't too happy. Was it selfish? Yes, of course it was, but I can live with that.
Only rule to no.1 son...don't tell grandma
Difficult one. I feel some sympathy. My wife (of 22 years), I courted mostly in hospital. She actually met my parent in intensive care with me in a coma. Her and my mom actually threw all my climbing gear away while I was in hospital.
I didn't climb for many years, but always missed it. Started again with no.1 son a few years ago. Wife wasn't too happy. Was it selfish? Yes, of course it was, but I can live with that.
Only rule to no.1 son...don't tell grandma
In reply to Goucho: Get out and get climbing again :not to be sound like a t%&t but had same sort of problem with ex so thats why she became ex life is to short only here once,no ifs and buts before you die and all the rest of the sayings.You already no the answer to question
In reply to Denni:
And this person is clearly a climber through and through.
> (In reply to Goucho)
> Probably harsh but the only important thing in life is people.
And this person is clearly a climber through and through.
In reply to Goucho:
You can always avert the mid-life problems by buying a Harley and putting your wife on the "bitch seat" !! (no offence to her, that's what Harley riders call the pillion)
You can always avert the mid-life problems by buying a Harley and putting your wife on the "bitch seat" !! (no offence to her, that's what Harley riders call the pillion)
In reply to Goucho:
P.S. - I am working on a thread which is quite connected to this one -watch this space !
P.S. - I am working on a thread which is quite connected to this one -watch this space !
In reply to Goucho:
You have to admit, she does have a point!
I found myself in a similar position a few decades ago, but in this case there were children involved so climbing was out really... but then I didn't feel such a strong urge to take up climbing again as you do... I'd "moved on" already, to use a ghastly expression which glosses over a awful lot of things. About 10 years ago I started climbing again in a very mild and limited fashion, but too late to do anything hard, and now I've had to stop for health reasons, which will probably be definitive.
So this is not much help because, as I'm sure you realise, there is no universal answer, in fact there is probably no answer at all. My example shows that if you leave it too long it may well be too late as luck and health are random things, but on the other hand life exists outside climbing... What about turning towards less extreme options which are still pretty good fun like skiing? With a bit of hiking and camping in the wilds with your wife... although seeing the mountains without being able to have a go can be even more frustrating.
You don't say if there are any children in the equation? My decision on this point was to put them first as they didn't ask to be born.
Good luck, be reassured that in different ways many go through what you are going through
> (In reply to Bobling) She doesn't want to be parted from me for any length of time, and doesn't want to go to my funeral!
You have to admit, she does have a point!
I found myself in a similar position a few decades ago, but in this case there were children involved so climbing was out really... but then I didn't feel such a strong urge to take up climbing again as you do... I'd "moved on" already, to use a ghastly expression which glosses over a awful lot of things. About 10 years ago I started climbing again in a very mild and limited fashion, but too late to do anything hard, and now I've had to stop for health reasons, which will probably be definitive.
So this is not much help because, as I'm sure you realise, there is no universal answer, in fact there is probably no answer at all. My example shows that if you leave it too long it may well be too late as luck and health are random things, but on the other hand life exists outside climbing... What about turning towards less extreme options which are still pretty good fun like skiing? With a bit of hiking and camping in the wilds with your wife... although seeing the mountains without being able to have a go can be even more frustrating.
You don't say if there are any children in the equation? My decision on this point was to put them first as they didn't ask to be born.
Good luck, be reassured that in different ways many go through what you are going through
In reply to higherclimbingwales:
It's not though if you do what he wants to do... I had one summer with 5 dead friends and the next watching someone fall past me to his death, missing us by a few feet... made me realise I wasn't immortal.
> I suspect you already know how safe climbing actually is if you know what you're doing,
It's not though if you do what he wants to do... I had one summer with 5 dead friends and the next watching someone fall past me to his death, missing us by a few feet... made me realise I wasn't immortal.
In reply to Goucho:
Reading down the thread I see you've sobered up and made a decision
In case you haven't, I didn't realise your age - at 54 how many years hard climbing can you realistically expect? Is it really worth splitting up for? Good wives are hard to find... and get harder with age.
Sorry to be so boring... Listen to "El Condor Pasa" on a loop and sob.
Reading down the thread I see you've sobered up and made a decision
In case you haven't, I didn't realise your age - at 54 how many years hard climbing can you realistically expect? Is it really worth splitting up for? Good wives are hard to find... and get harder with age.
Sorry to be so boring... Listen to "El Condor Pasa" on a loop and sob.
In reply to Goucho:
the fact that you put climbing first in the title "CLIMBING versus wife"
shows us all what you really want to do mate, you were obviously a serious climber at one point, so dont down tools just because your wife says "no" get her involved! and who knows maybe she will be with you when you go to the Himalayas
the fact that you put climbing first in the title "CLIMBING versus wife"
shows us all what you really want to do mate, you were obviously a serious climber at one point, so dont down tools just because your wife says "no" get her involved! and who knows maybe she will be with you when you go to the Himalayas
In reply to Bruce Hooker:
i agree with you 100% on this one Bruce
given the OPs age, the passage of time is going to force his hand at some point anyway. if he can find a compromise now, then he will hopefully not have to be an old, lonely ex-climber
cheers
gregor
i agree with you 100% on this one Bruce
given the OPs age, the passage of time is going to force his hand at some point anyway. if he can find a compromise now, then he will hopefully not have to be an old, lonely ex-climber
cheers
gregor
In reply to Goucho:
Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?
You been out ridin' fences for so long now
Oh, you're a hard one
I know that you got your reasons
These things that are pleasin' you
Can hurt you somehow
Don't you draw the queen of diamonds, boy
She'll beat you if she's able
You know the queen of hearts is always your best bet
Now it seems to me, some fine things
Have been laid upon your table
But you only want the ones that you can't get
Desperado, oh, you ain't gettin' no younger
Your pain and your hunger, they're drivin' you home
And freedom, oh freedom well, that's just some people talkin'
Your prison is walking through this world all alone
Don't your feet get cold in the winter time?
The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine
It's hard to tell the night time from the day
You're losin' all your highs and lows
Ain't it funny how the feeling goes away?
Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?
Come down from your fences, open the gate
It may be rainin', but there's a rainbow above you
You better let somebody love you, before it's too late
Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?
You been out ridin' fences for so long now
Oh, you're a hard one
I know that you got your reasons
These things that are pleasin' you
Can hurt you somehow
Don't you draw the queen of diamonds, boy
She'll beat you if she's able
You know the queen of hearts is always your best bet
Now it seems to me, some fine things
Have been laid upon your table
But you only want the ones that you can't get
Desperado, oh, you ain't gettin' no younger
Your pain and your hunger, they're drivin' you home
And freedom, oh freedom well, that's just some people talkin'
Your prison is walking through this world all alone
Don't your feet get cold in the winter time?
The sky won't snow and the sun won't shine
It's hard to tell the night time from the day
You're losin' all your highs and lows
Ain't it funny how the feeling goes away?
Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?
Come down from your fences, open the gate
It may be rainin', but there's a rainbow above you
You better let somebody love you, before it's too late
In reply to Goucho:
In reply to Goucho: You're 54, so as a married man who will be 53 in two months, I have an awareness of where you are, though my own achievements in the mountains were never close to E6 and the Salathe: more E2 and some corking TDs.
The thing is, in your mid 50s, you will simply never recapture the levels of performance you could reach in your 20s and 30s, no matter how much effort you put in. If you threw in your relationship, within a year or two you would realise that you were still looking backwards to those glory days, even if you did get up some worthwhile routes, as you probably would. And if you went on big greater ranges trips, the younger members of your team would be stronger. There is no way round this.
It sounds as if you have begun to reach a compromise, and that your "wobble" is over, which is great. Because the level of regret you will feel if you lose your wife, and as a result, inevitably, your lifestyle and home, all for the sake of chasing your own youth, would be intense. Imagine being alone, in your early 60s, heading irrevocably for old age, with no more ability to attract a hot partner. Not so much fun.
I assume there must be a basic compatibility between you that should enable some shared outdoor passion. How about a fabulous trek in the Himalaya?
Failing that, take up caving. I have found that if one keeps a good level of fitness by running and going to the gym, it is possible to do a fairly hardcore trip just occasionally: being less technical, it doesn't need the same degree of regular immersion that climbing does.
In reply to Goucho: You're 54, so as a married man who will be 53 in two months, I have an awareness of where you are, though my own achievements in the mountains were never close to E6 and the Salathe: more E2 and some corking TDs.
The thing is, in your mid 50s, you will simply never recapture the levels of performance you could reach in your 20s and 30s, no matter how much effort you put in. If you threw in your relationship, within a year or two you would realise that you were still looking backwards to those glory days, even if you did get up some worthwhile routes, as you probably would. And if you went on big greater ranges trips, the younger members of your team would be stronger. There is no way round this.
It sounds as if you have begun to reach a compromise, and that your "wobble" is over, which is great. Because the level of regret you will feel if you lose your wife, and as a result, inevitably, your lifestyle and home, all for the sake of chasing your own youth, would be intense. Imagine being alone, in your early 60s, heading irrevocably for old age, with no more ability to attract a hot partner. Not so much fun.
I assume there must be a basic compatibility between you that should enable some shared outdoor passion. How about a fabulous trek in the Himalaya?
Failing that, take up caving. I have found that if one keeps a good level of fitness by running and going to the gym, it is possible to do a fairly hardcore trip just occasionally: being less technical, it doesn't need the same degree of regular immersion that climbing does.
In reply to Goucho: Just got back from a three day trip to Wales, my wife of thirty eight years goes in for a hip replacement on thursday but my mates are going to the Roaches. Mrs J.S. said she will phone her sister to come and stay and my daughters said they will come home ! Am I a smug lucky bastard or what? I will stay home though as I am decent and compassionate. Oh, and my knees are stuffed. Good luck with Mrs Goucho.
In reply to Goucho: All this talk of being past it is a bit premature. I climbed my hardest climbs, in absolute terms, when I was 55. It has been downhill ever since mind you but I can still manage 6b+ and E3 at 64 years old so there's life in the old dog yet. I'm also certain that if I could get out more regularly I could improve on that and I seriously think that I could achieve 7a if I was willing to put in the effort.
Al
Al
In reply to Removed Userboje:
Who said he was having a mid life crisis? The guy obviously just loves climbing. Nothing necessarily to do with age. Nothing, presumably, to do with motorbikles. Surely everyone on here can relate to that.
> (In reply to Removed UserGoucho)
> You can always avert the mid-life problems by buying a Harley......
> You can always avert the mid-life problems by buying a Harley......
Who said he was having a mid life crisis? The guy obviously just loves climbing. Nothing necessarily to do with age. Nothing, presumably, to do with motorbikles. Surely everyone on here can relate to that.
In reply to davidoldfart: It's a shame it has to be a choice between someone you love and something you love in the first place.
From the point of view of an almost ex-climber, I can see what a self-centred bunch climbers are. There's a lot in this thread that's doing nothing to dissuade me from that view.
Climbing can be an incredibly time-consuming and intensive activity, making for a difficult bedfellow with family life and young children. I do nothing more than dabble these days and took up fell running to fill the gap, on the grounds that running was the quickest way of getting tired whilst seeing a bit of the outdoors. Ironically, I now realise I'll have to throw quite a bit of time at it to make decent improvements. And so the treadmill starts again. Good luck finding your balance.
Climbing can be an incredibly time-consuming and intensive activity, making for a difficult bedfellow with family life and young children. I do nothing more than dabble these days and took up fell running to fill the gap, on the grounds that running was the quickest way of getting tired whilst seeing a bit of the outdoors. Ironically, I now realise I'll have to throw quite a bit of time at it to make decent improvements. And so the treadmill starts again. Good luck finding your balance.
In reply to no_more_scotch_eggs: Yes! Just yes. just sang the whole thing to myself with a little tear. Hope you get it all sorted gouch. Gouranga!
In reply to Goucho: We are going though exactly the same sort of problems. One the one hand, if your marriage is healthy, you should both be allows free time to do your own thing and come back with a smile on your face. But at the same time, this does not mean going away all weekend every weekend and 4 nights a week mid-week. I believe the word you are looking for is "compromise".
Good luck!
Good luck!
In reply to steveri:
Why does choosing to sacrifice some other things in life in order to climb make us self-centred? Some people choose to sacrifice other things for work, some to have a family, some to support a football team etc. etc. Why single out climbing? It is no different from being committed to anything else. The only situation I can see in which it could be considered selfish is if you chose to have a family, but then significantly neglected them in order to go climbing. But that goes for anything else too.
> From the point of view of an almost ex-climber, I can see what a self-centred bunch climbers are.
Why does choosing to sacrifice some other things in life in order to climb make us self-centred? Some people choose to sacrifice other things for work, some to have a family, some to support a football team etc. etc. Why single out climbing? It is no different from being committed to anything else. The only situation I can see in which it could be considered selfish is if you chose to have a family, but then significantly neglected them in order to go climbing. But that goes for anything else too.
In reply to Goucho:
Being selfish is doing what you want to do instead of what someone else wants you to do, so bin her and get back out on the crags !!
Being selfish is doing what you want to do instead of what someone else wants you to do, so bin her and get back out on the crags !!
In reply to Goucho: See i think your 5th wife is better and prettier and she is an awesome climber........ what was your fourth wife called again????
In reply to Goucho:
Surprised no one's said it, but to be able to make an objective descision about the hotness of your wife, we do need pics. :P
However it sounds like you've made a choice. Good luck and I hope you don't get squashed under a HGV! Personally I think roadying is more necky than climbing, but there we go...
Surprised no one's said it, but to be able to make an objective descision about the hotness of your wife, we do need pics. :P
However it sounds like you've made a choice. Good luck and I hope you don't get squashed under a HGV! Personally I think roadying is more necky than climbing, but there we go...
In reply to davidoldfart:
Stevie Haston might disagree with that!
> The thing is, in your mid 50s, you will simply never recapture the levels of performance you could reach in your 20s and 30s, no matter how much effort you put in.
Stevie Haston might disagree with that!
In reply to Goucho: Well, thanks for all the advice folks, much appreciated, and some very wise words from many people.
As per my previous post, a compromise has been reached, and perspective regained.
Maybe I've been spending to much time reflecting recently, and looking back on halcyon days gone by, and maybe trying to reach for something with slight tunnel vision.
Although I've had some great experiences over the many years, there's a bit of a hole regarding the greater ranges - especially the Himalayas - which for a number of reasons both circumstantial and bad decisions, I never achieved.
Broke my leg 2 weeks before I was due to depart for Nanda Devi, bottled chances to go to both K2 and Broad Peak (a combination of career and women) and then settling for Denali and Huntingdon, being thwarted by the weather on both before a foot was even put on either mountain.
I suppose part of me has been thinking that even at my age, the goal of an 8000'er is not wholly unrealistic.
However, instead of moaning, I've decided to be thankful for what I have done, and am still here to tell the tale - a lot of very dear friends and climbing partners have not been so lucky.
And at the end of the day, Mrs Goucho is rather special lady (still haven't figured out what the hell she's doing with me!!!) and I shall still enjoy the climbing and the mountains, with her blessing, butat a less risky level.
Once again thanks for all the comments.
Gouch.
As per my previous post, a compromise has been reached, and perspective regained.
Maybe I've been spending to much time reflecting recently, and looking back on halcyon days gone by, and maybe trying to reach for something with slight tunnel vision.
Although I've had some great experiences over the many years, there's a bit of a hole regarding the greater ranges - especially the Himalayas - which for a number of reasons both circumstantial and bad decisions, I never achieved.
Broke my leg 2 weeks before I was due to depart for Nanda Devi, bottled chances to go to both K2 and Broad Peak (a combination of career and women) and then settling for Denali and Huntingdon, being thwarted by the weather on both before a foot was even put on either mountain.
I suppose part of me has been thinking that even at my age, the goal of an 8000'er is not wholly unrealistic.
However, instead of moaning, I've decided to be thankful for what I have done, and am still here to tell the tale - a lot of very dear friends and climbing partners have not been so lucky.
And at the end of the day, Mrs Goucho is rather special lady (still haven't figured out what the hell she's doing with me!!!) and I shall still enjoy the climbing and the mountains, with her blessing, butat a less risky level.
Once again thanks for all the comments.
Gouch.
In reply to Goucho:
Maybe those expensive watches really do work! (Sorry.....)
> Mrs Goucho is rather special lady (still haven't figured out what the hell she's doing with me!!!)
Maybe those expensive watches really do work! (Sorry.....)
In reply to Robert Durran: Ha Ha Ha - excellent Robert
In reply to Goucho:
A slight aside but my neighbours have just got back from a weekend of sailing and carousing round Coniston somewhere. They bumped into a couple who were in their mid seventies and who were off to do some routes on Dow on Saturday, and then off for some more fun on Pavey on Sunday - apparently this couple didn't start climbing until they were in their mid fifties!
Is Mrs Goucho a climber, or does she fancy trying it?
A slight aside but my neighbours have just got back from a weekend of sailing and carousing round Coniston somewhere. They bumped into a couple who were in their mid seventies and who were off to do some routes on Dow on Saturday, and then off for some more fun on Pavey on Sunday - apparently this couple didn't start climbing until they were in their mid fifties!
Is Mrs Goucho a climber, or does she fancy trying it?
In reply to Tall Clare: Unfortunately Mrs Goucho isn't a climber - the kind of rocks she's into tend to be set in gold...lol
She is a damn fine skier though.
She is a damn fine skier though.
In reply to Goucho:
Hurrah for that - I think that being into different sports is one thing, but if one of you is active and the other prefers, say, shopping, or golf (yes, I know it's technically a sport, but...) then it must be hard to strike a balance as you'll both struggle with the other's point of view.
Hurrah for that - I think that being into different sports is one thing, but if one of you is active and the other prefers, say, shopping, or golf (yes, I know it's technically a sport, but...) then it must be hard to strike a balance as you'll both struggle with the other's point of view.
In reply to Tall Clare: I consider myself to be quite a good skier, and have done some reasonably big off piste stuff, but Mrs Goucho makes me look like a novice - she did it competitively as a teenager.
Therefore, as she is also a pretty keen runner, I'm hoping I can get her into the whole ski-mountaineering thing at some point.
Therefore, as she is also a pretty keen runner, I'm hoping I can get her into the whole ski-mountaineering thing at some point.
In reply to Goucho:
Result! *
*I know it's not climbing, but ski mountaineering seems to get people to some awesome places nonetheless, and it seems to have its fair share of adrenalin moments.
Result! *
*I know it's not climbing, but ski mountaineering seems to get people to some awesome places nonetheless, and it seems to have its fair share of adrenalin moments.
In reply to Tall Clare: Ironically, it's much more dangerous than climbing...
In reply to Fultonius: Possibly, but the perception as far as Mrs Goucho is concerned (and she is a very experienced off-piste skier) is that it isn't
In reply to Goucho: I had the same problem, I gave up serious climbing and the two of us then did serious hill walking. Yes I miss the climbing but as you get older you would have to realise that you could no longer do the routes you used to do, thats almost as bad as your wife telling you to stop. At least she gives you a good excuse. I have the llanberis and Ogwen guides in the loo but they cant give you a cuddle in bed
In reply to Goucho:
Dude, this is a NO BRAINER!!
She is scared, she loves you, that is great so... Why not show her what calculated risk is and take her on some romantic rock trips in wales n good weather let her learn to accept the beauty of rock experiences.
On the other hand do her hobbies too and share what marriage should be about, loving and sharing each others lives. This will then Plow you to play with bigger stuff with the lads
done x x
Dude, this is a NO BRAINER!!
She is scared, she loves you, that is great so... Why not show her what calculated risk is and take her on some romantic rock trips in wales n good weather let her learn to accept the beauty of rock experiences.
On the other hand do her hobbies too and share what marriage should be about, loving and sharing each others lives. This will then Plow you to play with bigger stuff with the lads
done x x
Climbing.
In reply to Goucho: No, I don't think you are being selfish, probably she is scared of you getting injured, but you should go out and climb, no one should stop you from doing anything you want to do at whatever cost.
If she threatens to leave you then you have to cross that bridge if your feeling to want to get back into climbing are that strong, if you called her bluff be prepared for her to do anything I guess. Its all a bit un-predictable really, if she loves you then she'll let you go and do what you want to do, when you come back after each climb un-injured then she'll become more confidant with you and climbing, if you take a fall though, whether it was protected by the rope or not, don't tell her about it, it'll send her head into a spin.
Jase
If she threatens to leave you then you have to cross that bridge if your feeling to want to get back into climbing are that strong, if you called her bluff be prepared for her to do anything I guess. Its all a bit un-predictable really, if she loves you then she'll let you go and do what you want to do, when you come back after each climb un-injured then she'll become more confidant with you and climbing, if you take a fall though, whether it was protected by the rope or not, don't tell her about it, it'll send her head into a spin.
Jase
In reply to lone: Is it a question of time spent together? I think time for each other combined with time for yourself are a given in a relationship.Injury could be an anxiety but that can be talked about.I got used to a high risk male! but when we got our daughter, he won't now take risks- the nuturing instinct kicked in...
In reply to MargieB: Not the NUTURING instinct surley, or have you had him done!!
In reply to Dave 88:
Brilliant!! I've just spat coffee over my keyboard!!!
> (In reply to Goucho)
>
> It's quite simple really. Would you drive 12 hours, to MAYBE spend a day or two with a woman, knowing that it would be hard work the entire time you were with her, and there's a real possibility that she would kill you at any moment? Of course not, no woman is worth that.
>
> Now if that were a route...
>
> It's quite simple really. Would you drive 12 hours, to MAYBE spend a day or two with a woman, knowing that it would be hard work the entire time you were with her, and there's a real possibility that she would kill you at any moment? Of course not, no woman is worth that.
>
> Now if that were a route...
Brilliant!! I've just spat coffee over my keyboard!!!
In reply to Goucho: i;ve just become a dad so definitely locked in now.
I missed out on greater ranges in my 20's and I reckon I'll be waiting a long time to get back, will the desire still be there in 10-15 years? At the moment I can't afford the time and I;d struggle to justify the risk.
As some have pointed out (and the Mrs grasps) greater ranges climbing in very dangerous and time consuming and given your history you ain't going to be guided up mera peak are you?
U can improve and get very intense about sport climbing, look at RAb and AL austin.... watch the cycling though you don't need thunder thighs.
I would be very cautious in relying on her ignorance of the risk to persuade her that ski touring is the answer. There is a lot of uncontrolled variables. The good news is modern skis are amazing so you should be able to keep up.
Also there is a 7000m plus peak that you can ski! Basically a long red run.
allthe best
Al
I missed out on greater ranges in my 20's and I reckon I'll be waiting a long time to get back, will the desire still be there in 10-15 years? At the moment I can't afford the time and I;d struggle to justify the risk.
As some have pointed out (and the Mrs grasps) greater ranges climbing in very dangerous and time consuming and given your history you ain't going to be guided up mera peak are you?
U can improve and get very intense about sport climbing, look at RAb and AL austin.... watch the cycling though you don't need thunder thighs.
I would be very cautious in relying on her ignorance of the risk to persuade her that ski touring is the answer. There is a lot of uncontrolled variables. The good news is modern skis are amazing so you should be able to keep up.
Also there is a 7000m plus peak that you can ski! Basically a long red run.
allthe best
Al
In reply to Robert Durran:
OK, I was being facetious about the Harley but surely this post is all about age. I'm sure that if he was 24 Goucho would not be too concerned as there is plenty of time to sort out relationships and climbing ambitions. But he is 54 and on his fourth marriage and time is running out. If this one fails (and who knows how much baggage there is) he may well be pushing 60 before the smoke clears. After that climbing hard and setting up meaningful relationships will not be easy and health/fitness problems may well make the decisions for him.
To Goucho - you didn't ask for my advice but I would say to back off on the climbing a bit and go with the lady who obviously means a lot to you.
Best of luck,
Boje
OK, I was being facetious about the Harley but surely this post is all about age. I'm sure that if he was 24 Goucho would not be too concerned as there is plenty of time to sort out relationships and climbing ambitions. But he is 54 and on his fourth marriage and time is running out. If this one fails (and who knows how much baggage there is) he may well be pushing 60 before the smoke clears. After that climbing hard and setting up meaningful relationships will not be easy and health/fitness problems may well make the decisions for him.
To Goucho - you didn't ask for my advice but I would say to back off on the climbing a bit and go with the lady who obviously means a lot to you.
Best of luck,
Boje
The chips are down and she is testing their relationship. After three previous marriages she wants to find out hew determined he really is to make this one work. If he chooses climbing, she'll be off to find another source of cash, stability, social respect - and perhaps another nation's passport?
In reply to Removed Userboje:
To be honest Ian, I think Gouch is to some extent pulling the wool over our eyes... two days ago he climbed a 7a (11d) at Ceuse. How's that for a non-climber. Must admit, I quite fancy a Harley myself...
To be honest Ian, I think Gouch is to some extent pulling the wool over our eyes... two days ago he climbed a 7a (11d) at Ceuse. How's that for a non-climber. Must admit, I quite fancy a Harley myself...
In reply to jon: Just to clarify, she has no problem with me still getting out climbing. However, I started to want to think about maybe having a last gasp tilt at something in the greater ranges (Himalayas) which for one reason or another, I missed out on in earlier years.
It was a wobble, and as mentioned in previous posts, all has been reconciled, and I have decided that I already have a great balanced life, with a wonderful woman.
It was a wobble, and as mentioned in previous posts, all has been reconciled, and I have decided that I already have a great balanced life, with a wonderful woman.
In reply to Removed Userboje: See post to Jon, and thanks for the advice.
Gouch.
Gouch.
In reply to Bruce Hooker:
A random point perhaps, but that's the same number of smokers i've known who've died from different cancers.
Any smoking climbers reading this, take note. At least climbing can be a calculated risk.
> (In reply to highclimber)
>
> [...]
>
> It's not though if you do what he wants to do... I had one summer with 5 dead friends and the next watching someone fall past me to his death, missing us by a few feet... made me realise I wasn't immortal.
>
> [...]
>
> It's not though if you do what he wants to do... I had one summer with 5 dead friends and the next watching someone fall past me to his death, missing us by a few feet... made me realise I wasn't immortal.
A random point perhaps, but that's the same number of smokers i've known who've died from different cancers.
Any smoking climbers reading this, take note. At least climbing can be a calculated risk.
In reply to Rigid Raider:
Maybe she just loves her bloke and doesn't want him to die? I know, a radical thought given that the majority of us women are generally shallow money-grabbing insecure horrors...
FFS!
> The chips are down and she is testing their relationship. After three previous marriages she wants to find out hew determined he really is to make this one work. If he chooses climbing, she'll be off to find another source of cash, stability, social respect - and perhaps another nation's passport?
Maybe she just loves her bloke and doesn't want him to die? I know, a radical thought given that the majority of us women are generally shallow money-grabbing insecure horrors...
FFS!
In reply to andyb211:
Did you? did you really? wow!
> (In reply to Dave 88)
> [...]
>
> Brilliant!! I've just spat coffee over my keyboard!!!
> [...]
>
> Brilliant!! I've just spat coffee over my keyboard!!!
Did you? did you really? wow!
In reply to Goucho:
Fourth marriages are about to banned so you'll now be able to climb again!
May the Fourth be with you.
> After several years of no real climbing, I find I am missing it too much, and have an overwhelming need to get back out there on a regular basis - I miss it so much!!!
> However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
> However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!) has made it perfectly clear that she will not accept me starting to climb seriously again.
Fourth marriages are about to banned so you'll now be able to climb again!
May the Fourth be with you.
However, my wife (number 4, so not the best track record!!!)
Are you addicted to wedding cake ?,forget the climbing
In reply to Goucho:
I'd thank god for your adventures, and tell your wife to f*ck off.
I've been married 12 years, it sucks. But I love my daughters so much, I dont have the balls to walk out.
I'd thank god for your adventures, and tell your wife to f*ck off.
I've been married 12 years, it sucks. But I love my daughters so much, I dont have the balls to walk out.
This topic has been archived, and won't accept reply postings.
Loading Notifications...