In reply to luke obrien:
To Thundercat and Clarence, you had me laughing for 10 mins
Pulled an inter-costal muscle halfway through a snowboarding holiday putting on my sock in the morning. Took about 6 weeks to heal.
Few years ago now, in my excitement at receiving a delivery of new kites at my work place I managed to stab myself in the calf muscle with a sharp pair of scissors. Hurt like hell when climbing and I missed out on kite surfing for a month. They still tell me to be careful when handling scissors or parcels, bastards.
Riding my new racing bike no handed as a child. Looked behind me to see if my brother was watching only to ride into the back of a car. Nut's collided with the handlebar stem. This happened outside of the old Weston-S-Mare general hospital I got up all shocked and a nurse leaned out to ask if I was ok. I chose that point in time to crumple with a high pitched whimper. No major damage but very bruised tender plums for what seemed like a long time.
Again at a young age, our pet cat got revenge for some teasing. I used to get dressed on cold morning in front of an electric convection heater that was in the dining room at my parents house. I had just taken of my pyjama bottoms and the cat ran out of the kitchen and bit the end of my knob. I clutched my bitten bleeding knob with both hands and bent forward with a fair amount of force which caused my head to smash into the back of a chair whilst also causing my arse to come into contact with the extremely hot protective grill on the convection heater. The result was a six year old boy trying to clutch knob, arse and head while leaking tears, snot and blood. My brothers, sister, mum and dad who had witnessed all this were laughing so hard they were crying. My mum sent me to school that day with black eyes, a burnt arse, a savaged knob and also telling me that it was my own stupid fault for teasing the cat. I never teased that cat again.