UKC

So then, you have to pitch an idea in the Dragons Den which is not the normal bunch but some famous climbers/mountaineers.

First of all I need you to come up with the 5 "Dragons" and then a half baked, or even a good, idea for something for climbing/mountaineering related.

I'm still thinking so I need someone to start me off :0)

In reply to Denni:

You haven't thought this through at all have you? I can't even tell what your proposal is never mind the lack of business plan or IP protection.

For that reason ... I'm out.

In reply to john arran:

Good point! (starts mumbling about strategies, forecasts and some ice axe that turns into a distress beacon!)

In reply to Denni:

You need Stevie Haston as a dragon I think.

In reply to Southern Man: And Norrie Muir

In reply to Denni:

An ice axe, where you can fold the pick down when not in use, so that it is a less awkward shape for packing or carrying.

In reply to Denni:

Some trousers with built in bouldering mat protection in the bottom.

In reply to Denni:

cups filled with warm oil and rotating balls that will massage all those golfers elbows if you stick them in them... (ooo errrr missus)

In reply to Denni:

An add on to a Tom Tom that automatically tells you the way to the nearest dry crag.

In reply to Denni:

A snow shovel like a fan, so it folds up or folds out.

In reply to Removed User:

Ha! Yes, definitely.

Do we need a good cop to the bad cops? Messner?

For the dragons, can we have:

- Stevie Haston
- Andy Kirkpatrick
- Dave Graham
- Timmy O'Neil
- Will Gadd

I would pay good money to watch that!

In reply to tlm:

It's been done!
http://www.climbers-shop.com/9931862/products/climbing_technology_alpico_em...
Seems like CT don't make it any more though...

In reply to Monkey_Alan:

cheek! They stole my idea!

In reply to Denni:

How about a rucksac with little wheels on the bottom, so you can pull it along in the airport on your way to Spain, yet lug it about once you are off piste?

In reply to Denni:

and what about customised waterproofs? It wouldn't be that expensive if people put in all their measurements, chose from a range of options like pockets, colours etc, put it all online and it was fed straight to a computer operated coat making machine.

In reply to Denni:

how about a partner matching service? You put in what grades you climb at, where you live, when you are free, what you are looking for (an easy day out, multi pitching, hard, technical moves or whatever) and it pairs you up like a dating site.

In reply to Styx:


Good, but we need a real old-timer in there. I like the suggestion of Norrie Muir, or Bonners maybe to replace Will Gadd.

Or what about Mark Twight...?

Think I might be taking this a bit too seriously!

In reply to tlm:

<In best baffled and grumpy Yorkshire voice>

''Has tha not got tools woman? Buy an axe tha can tek appart.''

()........()

In reply to Southern Man:

What about throwing in Ken Wilson and one or the other of the Edwards? That would get things going...

In reply to Timmd:


It's the putting it back together that is the issue....

In reply to tlm:

Pat Little John and one of the Edwards could be an interesting mixture?

In reply to tlm:

Indeed, or the specific kind of axe you're after, I just wanted to pretend to be a baffled and grumpy Yorkshire person.()

It'd be easier to explain it in person I think, i'll stop diverting the thread...

In reply to Denni:

Similar to the bouldering mat trousers idea i guess, but how about a rucksack you wear that has some sort of motion and proximity detectors, and when rapid descent is detected, a giant air bag envelopes you, softening a ground fall.

Could make lowering your mate of a route quite entertaining!

In reply to The Norris:Heated gloves for digging your way out of an avalance could be handy.

In reply to The Norris:Your idea might help give space in an avalance so if you deflate the air bag there's some air and room to work out which way is up, before digging a way out with the heated gloves. Sorted!

In reply to Denni:

Ideal for those tricky corniced exits? No need to dodge round the side, just tunnel up.
http://www.oakleafmilitaria.com/images/104h3-1.jpg

In reply to Mike_Watson_99:

If you're working hard and you get a bit of a dab on, that looks like it should whistle as the steam comes out.

In reply to Denni:

Some kind of one-way system for a piss bottle that you can use in your sleeping bag without worrying about it tipping back out again when you 'withdraw' from it post-urination. And a furry cover for said piss bottle so it feels more like a hot water bottle against your feet afterwards.

In reply to Denni:

Something a bit like one of those oxyggen tents Pro cyclists sleep in but instead of giving me a ridiculous V02 I just want it to give me super strong forearms.

In reply to tlm:

Been done

Pilko pump pants.

In reply to Timmd:

Already been done...
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=KKqdgvsbfFQ&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DK...

In reply to Denni:
An ice screw that had some sort of spring arrangement betwix the end of the screw and the crab hanging plate so when you screwed in your 22 cm screw and it bottoms out after 18cm, the spring would push the plate against the ice rather that it being 4cm proud. This would illiminate the need for tying off screws.
Remember you read this here first and I'd prefer it if a British company ripped of my idea...

In reply to Denni:

If you think I am going to invest my children's inheritance in a half baked idea like this...

In reply to Denni:
A few ideas...

What about a lunchbox that is tough enough to keep out the Dewerstone squirrel or perhaps has a few claymore mines built into it to keep the little bugger at bay?

A climbing rope with built in tazer for hurrying up your second.

Water soluble bolt cement for "leave no trace" sport climbers and people who want to narrow down off-widths.

In reply to Denni:

A deflated balloon connected to a cylinder of compressed helium and clipped to your harness by a short length of rope.

If you get out your depth you just have to scream in terror and the balloon inflates automatically. You then float about gently until your belayer pulls you down with the rope.

In reply to tom_in_edinburgh:
A deflated balloon connected to a cylinder of compressed helium and clipped to your harness by a short length of rope.
If you get out your depth you just have to scream in terror and the balloon inflates automatically. You then float about gently until your belayer pulls you down with the rope.

I think you'll need a rather large balloon and helium tank.

http://www.ukclimbing.com/forums/t.php?t=522791&v=1#x7047455

In reply to Denni: I'd like the investment to go on a badly planned and poorly thought out expedition which is guaranteed to end badly. I then plan to make a fortune out of writing a book.

In reply to TryfAndy:

You might get trapped, like a lobster in a lobster pot!

In reply to Denni:

Airlie Anderson
Johnny Dawes
Andy K
Chris Tan (of www.kakibusok.plus.com/Equipment/index.htm)
Libby Peter (to be the Voice of Reason)

In reply to tlm:

It then matches you up with someone who climbs three grades lower than they wrote on their profile, wants you to lead everything and dropped their last three climbing partners, thus fully reproducing the online dating experience

In reply to Denni:

You'd have to have Cesari Maestri - he'd go for anything with an engine and not care what anyone else thought...

In reply to blanchie14c:


The hanger could just be on a screw thread too?

In reply to Denni:

How about

A thingy that gets the rope up first

A co2 powered bolt pistol

The self deploying arse parachute

An IPhone app that automatically updates eveything you do on grit

Sat nav upgrade called Crag Finder, with a specific upgrade for the Skoda Octavia

In reply to CurlyStevo:

Possibly, there would need to be a locking ring so the hanger locked up to enable it to be used as a handle when screwing in/out. Not a bad idea when you think of the advantages is it?

In reply to Reach>Talent:

I like this idea alot,This method could also be used for free climbing or self belaying. ie no need for a belayer or rope.

Coming down could be a problem though as well as being a hazard to low flying aircraft?
you,re on the right lines I think ,the idea just needs fine tuning..

In reply to Reach>Talent:

I like this idea alot,This method could also be used for free climbing or self belaying. ie no need for a belayer or rope.

Coming down could be a problem though as well as being a hazard to low flying aircraft?
you,re on the right lines I think ,the idea just needs fine tuning..

In reply to Reach>Talent:

I like this idea alot,This method could also be used for free climbing or self belaying. ie no need for a belayer or rope.

Coming down could be a problem though as well as being a hazard to low flying aircraft?
you,re on the right lines I think ,the idea just needs fine tuning..

In reply to colina:
Helium will give you about 1kg of lift per m3 of gas...
Average person weighs about 70kg, so needs 70m3 of helium to offset that. Unfortunately you've got to carry the gas in cylinders. A 9m3 cylinder weighs about 85kg so you get 0.5kg of net lift per cylinder. 140 cylinders would be required to make you bouyant and you'd need at least another couple to make any noticable lift...

In reply to colina:

First fine tuning. The balloon has a radius of 2.67m and is pre inflated with helium to give sufficient lift to balance an 80kg load. It is clipped to an anchor (or bag full of rocks) on the ground. The main climbing rope is hooked up to the balloon via a mechanism that allows it to pay out as the climber ascends and a second lighter tether rope also tied between the climber and ground anchor.

When the climber thinks they are about to fall they simply scream in terror and the electronics at the anchor releases the balloon which shoots up. When the line to the balloon comes tight the climber's weight is cancelled and they can drift slowly to the ground pulling themselves down to the anchor using the thether rope.

In reply to Denni:

A midge repellant that really works.

In reply to Reach>Talent:

So the first fine tuning where the balloon and cylinders stay on the ground and the balloon is tied to the climber avoid the cylinder weight issue. To get 80kg of lift only 9 cylinders are needed.

Second fine tuning. Rather than try and cancel all the climbers weight and have them float down the system just aims to reduce the fall force enough so they can land safely. The air resistance as the climber drags the large balloon down will also have a parachute effect. So maybe it only needs 30 or 40kg of lift instead of 80, which would be 4 or 5 cylinders.

Still not quite there though....

In reply to gribble:

There's always someone who ruins a thread like this by coming up with something *way* too far fetched.

In reply to Reach>Talent:

I'm gonna invest in something else.
Tom youre idea is crap.