In reply to Emily_pipes:
Update:
I finally got around to taking the trousers back to Go Outdoors yesterday. I had a Monty Python-esque conversation with the manager, wherein he pointed out the damage to the fabric and Gore-Tex patches on the bum, from glissading and some technical bump sliding on rock, and said, "How do I know that the damage to the seams on the side didn't occur at the same time as this." I said, "It didn't." He said, "I don't know that." I said, "I'm telling you." He repeated, "But I don't know that. The damage could have occurred at the same time." I said, "It didn't. And the seams shouldn't rip like that." He said, "It's already damaged." I said, "That's the problem." He said, "It's not eligible for refund because it's damaged. The best I can do is send them to the manufacturer." I said, "Fine." He added, "They might sew the seams along the side but it's damaged on the rear and they may not fix that." I pointed out, "The seams are stretching in a few areas on the sides and they will break sooner or later" He said, "But I don't know when that damage occurred." I said, "Every time I use them." He said, "I don't know that."
This discussion continued for some time. Then he grumbled, "As a goodwill gesture, I'll send them to Paramo."
He looked up partner's discount card on the computer and said, "There's no record of this on the discount card." I replied that I would not have bought them without the card, because they are not cheap. He said, "There's no record of this." Then OH, who bought some Nepals from Go Outdoors at roughly the same time, asked if there were any records of that purchase. None. OH pointed out that he had priced-matched the Nepals and you need a discount card to do that. And also, why the hell would you not get as much off expensive boots as you can? Of course he used the card. Manager said, "There are no Nepals on this card." He found purchases going as far back as 2013, but all for more trivial, less expensive stuff, and a gap in the record for the Nepals and Paramos. He added, "This is why you should keep receipts." OH responded, "One of the reasons I have the discount card is so I don't have to."
Somewhere there was a cock-up with their computer system.
At least the manager still sent the Paramos in because OH and I made it clear we were going to stand there and argue about it.
The verdict: the Paramos are on their way back, I bought some ME G2s from Joe Brown's in Wales when we were down there a few weeks ago (having the view that even if they fixed the Paramos, the things were just going to get more holes in five minutes), Go Outdoors suck at customer service but have their own version of the Dead Parrot sketch, and their computer system is useless. The jury is still out on what the ultimate fate of the Paramos will be.
Post edited at 12:15