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Pick a pivotal moment in your life where you had two choices that would lead to widely divergent lives.
Mine is:
Got onto a photography diploma course at an art school. Had to give up the place as my family could not afford to send me to college and the course did not qualify for any grants at the time (1987).
I often wonder how that life would have been.
Mine is:
Got onto a photography diploma course at an art school. Had to give up the place as my family could not afford to send me to college and the course did not qualify for any grants at the time (1987).
I often wonder how that life would have been.
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In reply to Flinticus:
in the 70's, about to leave school and go to art college... then was offered an engineering apprenticeship
my art teacher was disappointed, my dad was happy.
in the 70's, about to leave school and go to art college... then was offered an engineering apprenticeship
my art teacher was disappointed, my dad was happy.
In reply to Glyno:
Was that your choice?I think engineering would be alright, something I would be interested in.
Was that your choice?I think engineering would be alright, something I would be interested in.
In reply to Flinticus:
Dropped out of uni having failed year one after one or two personal problems.
My parents dragged me back down and forced me to look through every course that would take me and get me talk to my supervisors round. I got onto a philosophy degree, took up climbing, met my girlfriend and have a successful career all off the back of things that happened over those couple of weeks. In retrospect given where I was I think there's a passable case that they saved my life but if not I'd likely have been in a very different place.
Dropped out of uni having failed year one after one or two personal problems.
My parents dragged me back down and forced me to look through every course that would take me and get me talk to my supervisors round. I got onto a philosophy degree, took up climbing, met my girlfriend and have a successful career all off the back of things that happened over those couple of weeks. In retrospect given where I was I think there's a passable case that they saved my life but if not I'd likely have been in a very different place.
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In reply to Flinticus:
2002, working as a software developer in Sheffield. Got asked if I could be free to quit and work 4 months in Kosovo with no guarantees of any job afterwards.
Jumped at the chance. Took a while to get a second one, but then never looked back.
Edit: Good thread, by the way.
2002, working as a software developer in Sheffield. Got asked if I could be free to quit and work 4 months in Kosovo with no guarantees of any job afterwards.
Jumped at the chance. Took a while to get a second one, but then never looked back.
Edit: Good thread, by the way.
Post edited at 21:55
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In reply to Flinticus:
drunk, vaulted the railing of a bridge over a motorway and landed on the narrow ledge on the other side safely. Got dragged back over and screamed at by friends.
drunk, vaulted the railing of a bridge over a motorway and landed on the narrow ledge on the other side safely. Got dragged back over and screamed at by friends.
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In reply to Flinticus:
Walked away from my ex and her kids and met a wonderful woman a few weeks later that I have been with 18 years today and 15 years married to.
Walked away from my ex and her kids and met a wonderful woman a few weeks later that I have been with 18 years today and 15 years married to.
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In reply to Flinticus:
The thing is, quite trivial events can have profound effects. You might buy a last pint of milk from a shop causing another customer to have to drive elsewhere for a pinta. Does he make it? And once you have affected one event, well, that cascades onwards and forever; its effect can only ever get bigger. We generate such cascades continually - so whilst it is easy (and fun) to reflect on the big decisions, it's only part of the alternatives out there.
With respect to the OP, I've thought about about this a lot over the decades because, after a days climbing a long time ago, i'd untied my chalkbag and was intent on packing up. My dad suggested we solo one more route...and i said "yes", never thinking that that answer would change my life profoundly and irrevocably. Weird in retrospect how little thought i put in to a response that would affect us both so much.
The thing is, quite trivial events can have profound effects. You might buy a last pint of milk from a shop causing another customer to have to drive elsewhere for a pinta. Does he make it? And once you have affected one event, well, that cascades onwards and forever; its effect can only ever get bigger. We generate such cascades continually - so whilst it is easy (and fun) to reflect on the big decisions, it's only part of the alternatives out there.
With respect to the OP, I've thought about about this a lot over the decades because, after a days climbing a long time ago, i'd untied my chalkbag and was intent on packing up. My dad suggested we solo one more route...and i said "yes", never thinking that that answer would change my life profoundly and irrevocably. Weird in retrospect how little thought i put in to a response that would affect us both so much.
Post edited at 22:51
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In reply to Flinticus:
Nice thread idea.
Bumped Into a geezer we called "Purdey" at school. I was just out of my apprenticeship, and drifting between engineering works as a journeyman, making good money, but getting laid off regularly, due to the economics of the day (1979-80.)
He told me I should go to Uni. I laughed, as I had no "O" levels, let alone "A" levels. He said I should take my engineering qualifications, the ones I'd got in night school during my apprenticeship, to the local education office and see if I could get in. I did that.
After looking at them, the bloke at the education office said; "Which college would you like to go to, you can take your pick?" Six months later I went to Plymouth Uni. It turns out I had the equivalent of three decent "A" levels, plus a host of other relevant skills/education.
Nice thread idea.
Bumped Into a geezer we called "Purdey" at school. I was just out of my apprenticeship, and drifting between engineering works as a journeyman, making good money, but getting laid off regularly, due to the economics of the day (1979-80.)
He told me I should go to Uni. I laughed, as I had no "O" levels, let alone "A" levels. He said I should take my engineering qualifications, the ones I'd got in night school during my apprenticeship, to the local education office and see if I could get in. I did that.
After looking at them, the bloke at the education office said; "Which college would you like to go to, you can take your pick?" Six months later I went to Plymouth Uni. It turns out I had the equivalent of three decent "A" levels, plus a host of other relevant skills/education.
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In reply to Big Ger:
Should add to that story: I hadn't seen that guy* since leaving school some six-eight years prior to bumping into him, and have never seen him again!
*I cannot even recall his real name.
Should add to that story: I hadn't seen that guy* since leaving school some six-eight years prior to bumping into him, and have never seen him again!
*I cannot even recall his real name.
Post edited at 03:31
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In reply to Flinticus:
it was a difficult decision, but the prospect of a regular wage packet swung it.
it was a difficult decision, but the prospect of a regular wage packet swung it.
In reply to Flinticus:
Having done well at Uni I was contemplating a possible future as an academic. At the last minute decided against, came home, got married and worked in a factory for a year. Then went into teaching. As the years went by, realised I had relatively little talent for original ideas, but did have some for explaining other people’s. Ended up spending twelve years as a secondary head, which I found immensely exciting, worthwhile and rewarding. Lucky.
Having done well at Uni I was contemplating a possible future as an academic. At the last minute decided against, came home, got married and worked in a factory for a year. Then went into teaching. As the years went by, realised I had relatively little talent for original ideas, but did have some for explaining other people’s. Ended up spending twelve years as a secondary head, which I found immensely exciting, worthwhile and rewarding. Lucky.
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In reply to Shani:
There is some saying that anyone could be just X number of decisions that go wrong, from sleeping on the streets.
> The thing is, quite trivial events can have profound effects.
There is some saying that anyone could be just X number of decisions that go wrong, from sleeping on the streets.
In reply to Flinticus:
Wandered in to my PhD supervisor's office to discuss referee's comments to a paper maybe a year after I'd graduated, when the fax machine in the corner started up. A short note from a lab in France asking Iain if he knew anyone interested in a postdoc job about to be created. At the time I was rarely in the university & had I not been in the room at the time I suspect the fax would have gone in the bin. I applied for the job & a couple of months later moved to France, something I'd thought of doing.
That short stay led to another longer stay & I've now been here for most of the past 25 years.
Wandered in to my PhD supervisor's office to discuss referee's comments to a paper maybe a year after I'd graduated, when the fax machine in the corner started up. A short note from a lab in France asking Iain if he knew anyone interested in a postdoc job about to be created. At the time I was rarely in the university & had I not been in the room at the time I suspect the fax would have gone in the bin. I applied for the job & a couple of months later moved to France, something I'd thought of doing.
That short stay led to another longer stay & I've now been here for most of the past 25 years.
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In reply to captain paranoia:
A serious accident. A consequence that was painfully disproportionate to the trivial decision to re-tie my chalk bag for 'one more climb'.
> So, what happened...?
A serious accident. A consequence that was painfully disproportionate to the trivial decision to re-tie my chalk bag for 'one more climb'.
In reply to Shani:
My wife, psychologist, sees such issues: large tragic consequences out of all proportion to the decisions taken to arrive there. Hard to get beyond the 'what if...' and see if wasn't your fault.
My wife, psychologist, sees such issues: large tragic consequences out of all proportion to the decisions taken to arrive there. Hard to get beyond the 'what if...' and see if wasn't your fault.
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In reply to Flinticus:
Going to medical school (where I had a guaranteed place) after my military service, rather than studying biology. Much less interesting, of course, but would have a more stable job now. In the worst case I could have turned into a Porsche driving arsehole, defining myself by money
Of course, I would have never met my wife.
CB
Going to medical school (where I had a guaranteed place) after my military service, rather than studying biology. Much less interesting, of course, but would have a more stable job now. In the worst case I could have turned into a Porsche driving arsehole, defining myself by money
Of course, I would have never met my wife.
CB
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In reply to Flinticus:
Got offered a job as canoe guide to a rafting company in France, at the same time managed to get myself accepted to a Uni course in Glasgow which would mean moving to Glasgow.
Chose the Uni course, met my now wife, still live in the West Coast - back canoeing again after a 15 year hiatus
Got offered a job as canoe guide to a rafting company in France, at the same time managed to get myself accepted to a Uni course in Glasgow which would mean moving to Glasgow.
Chose the Uni course, met my now wife, still live in the West Coast - back canoeing again after a 15 year hiatus
In reply to Flinticus:
I was 26, starting to accept I would never have a job I truly enjoyed and had started to drink too much and too often. One day (not drunk), I was coming down the stairs in my shared house, and my feet got tangled in a cardigan left on the stairs by my housemate. I fell from the second-to-top step and landed, arms-outstretched in the hallway. I woke up, in bed, with two broken arms and a fractured eye socket and had to take three months off work and had to move back in with my parents. In those three months I spent most days searching the internet for apprenticeships and found and applied for the training course which resulted in the job I've held and (at times) love for the last nine years.
Who knew such good could come from falling down the stairs.
I was 26, starting to accept I would never have a job I truly enjoyed and had started to drink too much and too often. One day (not drunk), I was coming down the stairs in my shared house, and my feet got tangled in a cardigan left on the stairs by my housemate. I fell from the second-to-top step and landed, arms-outstretched in the hallway. I woke up, in bed, with two broken arms and a fractured eye socket and had to take three months off work and had to move back in with my parents. In those three months I spent most days searching the internet for apprenticeships and found and applied for the training course which resulted in the job I've held and (at times) love for the last nine years.
Who knew such good could come from falling down the stairs.
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In reply to Flinticus:
I went to university intending to read computer science. At that time it was only a 2 year course, so I did natural sciences in year 1... and followed my nose into biology instead.
It was 1985 and computing was just about to get very very big.
I went to university intending to read computer science. At that time it was only a 2 year course, so I did natural sciences in year 1... and followed my nose into biology instead.
It was 1985 and computing was just about to get very very big.
In reply to Deadeye:
It already was in 1980 at Cambridge... all the Nat Sci Computer Scientists in my college were earning good money on the side writing software for the new computer boom and had a choice of excellent jobs, even if they didnt want to forge out on their own.
It already was in 1980 at Cambridge... all the Nat Sci Computer Scientists in my college were earning good money on the side writing software for the new computer boom and had a choice of excellent jobs, even if they didnt want to forge out on their own.
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In reply to Flinticus:
Went to a shopping centre in Glasgow one Saturday in 2000 with my parents. Saw a mobile climbing wall and asked to have a go. It was raining, Mum wasn't sure about it. Loved it!
We very nearly went to another shopping place instead before Mum changed her mind...
Went to a shopping centre in Glasgow one Saturday in 2000 with my parents. Saw a mobile climbing wall and asked to have a go. It was raining, Mum wasn't sure about it. Loved it!
We very nearly went to another shopping place instead before Mum changed her mind...
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In reply to Flinticus:
Aged 17, I was offered a place at Oxford university to study archaeology. At about the same time I was offered a job as an assistant pro at a golf club on £17 per week.
Of course I went to play golf. 2 months later I broke both of my wrists playing football, end of golf career such as it was.
Aged 17, I was offered a place at Oxford university to study archaeology. At about the same time I was offered a job as an assistant pro at a golf club on £17 per week.
Of course I went to play golf. 2 months later I broke both of my wrists playing football, end of golf career such as it was.
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In reply to Flinticus:
There are too many to just pick one:
On a whim decided to leave school at 16 instead of "staying on" as everyone expected me to do. This would have almost certainly led me to going to university ten years earlier than I otherwise did.
Getting my girlfriend (later wife) pregnant when I was 18. Ironically this made me change my mind about further education and, instead of being something that my employer required me to do, became something that I sought out, if not insisted upon, leading to a couple of job moves.
An opportunity to start my own business that I bottled out of.
A random meeting with an old school friend led me to becoming dissatisfied with my job and realising there was more to software engineering than controlling motors and relays, which led me to Digital TV.
An opportunity to start a business with some colleagues that I was very nervous about, but did anyway, and has been very successful.
The realisation that, after years of trying to help my wife with depression and alcoholism, that a large part of her depression and alcoholism was because she didn't like living with me, so I moved out.
There are too many to just pick one:
On a whim decided to leave school at 16 instead of "staying on" as everyone expected me to do. This would have almost certainly led me to going to university ten years earlier than I otherwise did.
Getting my girlfriend (later wife) pregnant when I was 18. Ironically this made me change my mind about further education and, instead of being something that my employer required me to do, became something that I sought out, if not insisted upon, leading to a couple of job moves.
An opportunity to start my own business that I bottled out of.
A random meeting with an old school friend led me to becoming dissatisfied with my job and realising there was more to software engineering than controlling motors and relays, which led me to Digital TV.
An opportunity to start a business with some colleagues that I was very nervous about, but did anyway, and has been very successful.
The realisation that, after years of trying to help my wife with depression and alcoholism, that a large part of her depression and alcoholism was because she didn't like living with me, so I moved out.
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In reply to Deadeye:
Ha. Another of mine
After having to pass up the photography course, I then went back to resit exams. Next year I had a choice and did not take the Computer Science offering. 1988. I missed that gravy train as it left the station.
The field I went into was in recession when I graduated...and was a closed shop effectively by the 'who you know, not what' situation. So unlike the new exciting expanding field of computer science.
Ha. Another of mine
After having to pass up the photography course, I then went back to resit exams. Next year I had a choice and did not take the Computer Science offering. 1988. I missed that gravy train as it left the station.
The field I went into was in recession when I graduated...and was a closed shop effectively by the 'who you know, not what' situation. So unlike the new exciting expanding field of computer science.
In reply to Flinticus:
Age 19, during my gap year (utterly unusual in France then and now, noone takes a gap year) I was supposed to work as a liftie in my local ski resort. It was a poor season and snow did not materialise early enough. The old timers got the jobs first, I did not get picked so went skiing almost everyday on rubbish snow. Then a dump happened and for 3 days it was awesome, no work, plenty powder until that fateful moment when I decided it'd be good to go jump that 6m rock (run of the mill jump in normal conditions). I went to the bottom on reception, a sapling caught a ski. speed and twist threw me off-line onto a barely covered tree stump. Multiple vertebrae fractures.
I was going to do a new-zealand winter straight after. I reckon, had I been, I would have stayed there, or come back and become a ski bum. Instead, a weakened back meant I could not work in construction (a flexible sector for cash strapped folks) to make skiing money. I went to Uni, learned English properly, met my wife.
Age 19, during my gap year (utterly unusual in France then and now, noone takes a gap year) I was supposed to work as a liftie in my local ski resort. It was a poor season and snow did not materialise early enough. The old timers got the jobs first, I did not get picked so went skiing almost everyday on rubbish snow. Then a dump happened and for 3 days it was awesome, no work, plenty powder until that fateful moment when I decided it'd be good to go jump that 6m rock (run of the mill jump in normal conditions). I went to the bottom on reception, a sapling caught a ski. speed and twist threw me off-line onto a barely covered tree stump. Multiple vertebrae fractures.
I was going to do a new-zealand winter straight after. I reckon, had I been, I would have stayed there, or come back and become a ski bum. Instead, a weakened back meant I could not work in construction (a flexible sector for cash strapped folks) to make skiing money. I went to Uni, learned English properly, met my wife.
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In reply to Flinticus:
My wife and I were up in Edinburgh a few weeks ago and, outside Edinburgh Castle, we saw a memorial to the Gordon Highlanders. "I nearly joined the Gordon Highlanders", I said. "If I had, I would not have met you and our lives would have been completely different". A simple decision made as a youngster (I joined the Royal Engineers instead) without consideration of much beyond the fairly immediate and straightforward, changed both of our lives in a way that was inconceivable at the time. That choice, I'd hesitate to call it a decision, was made 34 years ago. I wonder which way the other path led?
My wife and I were up in Edinburgh a few weeks ago and, outside Edinburgh Castle, we saw a memorial to the Gordon Highlanders. "I nearly joined the Gordon Highlanders", I said. "If I had, I would not have met you and our lives would have been completely different". A simple decision made as a youngster (I joined the Royal Engineers instead) without consideration of much beyond the fairly immediate and straightforward, changed both of our lives in a way that was inconceivable at the time. That choice, I'd hesitate to call it a decision, was made 34 years ago. I wonder which way the other path led?
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In reply to Flinticus:
Good thread. I'll try and give a short account...
Separated from my wife, who I'd been with since I was 18, last year. I was 32 years old, working an office job that I wasn't particularly happy in and dealing with the fall out of a divorce - all the emotional and practical baggage associated with that. Made a phone call to a friend who suggested I consider making the leap and doing my MSc in outdoor education at Edinburgh Uni. Going from full time secure work to student life, and much more uncertain future job prospects felt like a pivotal moment - and a decision which if I didn't make now, I would probably never make.
Fast forward five months and I feel like I'm living the dream - developing some amazing friendships, awesome opportunities to develop my climbing and leadership skills and loving city life in a way I never thought possible!
Maybe a note of encouragement for those going through difficult times - amazing things can come out of your darkest moments, in ways that you least expect.
Good thread. I'll try and give a short account...
Separated from my wife, who I'd been with since I was 18, last year. I was 32 years old, working an office job that I wasn't particularly happy in and dealing with the fall out of a divorce - all the emotional and practical baggage associated with that. Made a phone call to a friend who suggested I consider making the leap and doing my MSc in outdoor education at Edinburgh Uni. Going from full time secure work to student life, and much more uncertain future job prospects felt like a pivotal moment - and a decision which if I didn't make now, I would probably never make.
Fast forward five months and I feel like I'm living the dream - developing some amazing friendships, awesome opportunities to develop my climbing and leadership skills and loving city life in a way I never thought possible!
Maybe a note of encouragement for those going through difficult times - amazing things can come out of your darkest moments, in ways that you least expect.
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In reply to Flinticus:
Just finished university (1999) and applied to one of the YHA jobs in the back of the big issue at Keswick YHA, several months later got offered the job but turned it down to work in London at the job I had picked up since applying to the YHA. I wonder where the other path would have led?
Just finished university (1999) and applied to one of the YHA jobs in the back of the big issue at Keswick YHA, several months later got offered the job but turned it down to work in London at the job I had picked up since applying to the YHA. I wonder where the other path would have led?
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In reply to Flinticus:
Messing up my A-levels and ending up at Southampton Uni instead of Bristol.
Best thing that ever happened to me. Met my wife for a start!
If I ever meet the admissions person from Bristol I'll thank them for not letting me, unlike the lovely people at Southampton who gave me a chance I didn't deserve.
Messing up my A-levels and ending up at Southampton Uni instead of Bristol.
Best thing that ever happened to me. Met my wife for a start!
If I ever meet the admissions person from Bristol I'll thank them for not letting me, unlike the lovely people at Southampton who gave me a chance I didn't deserve.
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In reply to Shani:
Sorry to hear that; I don't remember you mentioning it before, but maybe I'd missed it. Hope you (or your father?) have recovered as well as possible.
Sorry to hear that; I don't remember you mentioning it before, but maybe I'd missed it. Hope you (or your father?) have recovered as well as possible.
Post edited at 23:05
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In reply to Flinticus:
Asking a girl to marry me, (and her accepting,) even though we'd only spent six weeks together.
Then marrying her, and giving up everything, house, job, and living in the one part of the world which I swore was the place I'd spend the rest of my life, etc, to move to the other side of the word to live with her.
Asking a girl to marry me, (and her accepting,) even though we'd only spent six weeks together.
Then marrying her, and giving up everything, house, job, and living in the one part of the world which I swore was the place I'd spend the rest of my life, etc, to move to the other side of the word to live with her.
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In reply to captain paranoia:
Appreciated. (I've not mentioned it before on UKC so you'd never have known.)
It was a fatal accident. Tragedy stalks the world, so my experience is not a special case. But in line with the OP, it certainly resulted in an 'alternative me'.
> Sorry to hear that; I don't remember you mentioning it before, but maybe I'd missed it. Hope you (or your father?) have recovered as well as possible.
Appreciated. (I've not mentioned it before on UKC so you'd never have known.)
It was a fatal accident. Tragedy stalks the world, so my experience is not a special case. But in line with the OP, it certainly resulted in an 'alternative me'.
Post edited at 07:55
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In reply to Shani:
Oh bugger. Yes, turning points don't come much bigger than that. My sincere, if belated condolences.
Oh bugger. Yes, turning points don't come much bigger than that. My sincere, if belated condolences.
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In reply to captain paranoia:
What is weird is that, putting aside the ongoing torment (!) of being unable to share life experiences with such an important family member, is that I have had an incredibly fortunate and good life since. I never expected to get married or have kids but I've done both - incredible as it may seem to some out there! I've got some fanstastic friends - lifelong, and have a lifestyle that allows me to satisfy my intellectual curiosity, and pursue creative (musical), and physical pursuits (I am in good health).
I feel awkward/guilty to be enjoying life when my dad can't. It's weird - I guess part of the trauma of it all - you never 'get over it' you just 'grow in to it'. The tragic thing about such a monumental events is that the day after, the world still turns. It's only in your head that things have stopped and been shaken to the core. Everything else around you carries on (as indeed it must). The only real control you can have is in how you respond to events - and even then, the control is not in ways you think. Then you look on the news and realise tragedy is ongoing and has a ceaseless appetite....my life could be worse.
Anyway - this isn't Mumsnet so I'll put all this shite back in my mental box called 'Do Not Disturb'.
> Oh bugger. Yes, turning points don't come much bigger than that. My sincere, if belated condolences.
What is weird is that, putting aside the ongoing torment (!) of being unable to share life experiences with such an important family member, is that I have had an incredibly fortunate and good life since. I never expected to get married or have kids but I've done both - incredible as it may seem to some out there! I've got some fanstastic friends - lifelong, and have a lifestyle that allows me to satisfy my intellectual curiosity, and pursue creative (musical), and physical pursuits (I am in good health).
I feel awkward/guilty to be enjoying life when my dad can't. It's weird - I guess part of the trauma of it all - you never 'get over it' you just 'grow in to it'. The tragic thing about such a monumental events is that the day after, the world still turns. It's only in your head that things have stopped and been shaken to the core. Everything else around you carries on (as indeed it must). The only real control you can have is in how you respond to events - and even then, the control is not in ways you think. Then you look on the news and realise tragedy is ongoing and has a ceaseless appetite....my life could be worse.
Anyway - this isn't Mumsnet so I'll put all this shite back in my mental box called 'Do Not Disturb'.
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In reply to Shani:
Please don't feel you need to do that, if it helps to express how you feel.
I lost my dad when I was pretty young (not in quite such dramatic circumstances as you but it was pretty traumatic) and it's only recently that I've realised how very much I haven't 'got over it'. And, like you, it's the fact that I can't share with him how my life has (very happily) developed that still hurts.
> Anyway - this isn't Mumsnet so I'll put all this shite back in my mental box called 'Do Not Disturb'.
Please don't feel you need to do that, if it helps to express how you feel.
I lost my dad when I was pretty young (not in quite such dramatic circumstances as you but it was pretty traumatic) and it's only recently that I've realised how very much I haven't 'got over it'. And, like you, it's the fact that I can't share with him how my life has (very happily) developed that still hurts.
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In reply to Flinticus:
1994 towards the end of my year abroad in Germany I decided to stay on for another year despite the opposition of my parents who thought I would never come back and finish my degree. The best thing I ever did and I grew up a lot in those 2 years .
Fast forward to late 1996 - had just finished my final year at university and was planning on going back to Germany but met someone and never made it. I do wonder what I would be doing now, whether I would have a success of moving back.
1994 towards the end of my year abroad in Germany I decided to stay on for another year despite the opposition of my parents who thought I would never come back and finish my degree. The best thing I ever did and I grew up a lot in those 2 years .
Fast forward to late 1996 - had just finished my final year at university and was planning on going back to Germany but met someone and never made it. I do wonder what I would be doing now, whether I would have a success of moving back.
In reply to Dave Garnett:
That genuinely choked my up. 'Appreciate your post. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Isn't it strange how, as we get older, the stories that bind us in blood become more important? I have a huge list of questions I want to ask my dad about who he was, his life, etc.... Without the fantasy of God to occupy my mind the big question of "Why am I here" is answered by looking only as far as my parents. Just wish I could run few questions by both them.
One positive is that a few UKC'ers knew him, and over the years I have made contact with them. It is amazing still find out 'new' stories about him 20 years after his death. It is like an ongoing book and there are always fresh chapters ahead.
And this is all thanks to Michael Faraday back in 1831, without whom this medium of communication would not be possible! I wonder what I'd be doing if Faraday had lived an alternative life....?
> I lost my dad when I was pretty young and it's only recently that I've realised how very much I haven't 'got over it'. And, like you, it's the fact that I can't share with him how my life has (very happily) developed that still hurts.
That genuinely choked my up. 'Appreciate your post. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Isn't it strange how, as we get older, the stories that bind us in blood become more important? I have a huge list of questions I want to ask my dad about who he was, his life, etc.... Without the fantasy of God to occupy my mind the big question of "Why am I here" is answered by looking only as far as my parents. Just wish I could run few questions by both them.
One positive is that a few UKC'ers knew him, and over the years I have made contact with them. It is amazing still find out 'new' stories about him 20 years after his death. It is like an ongoing book and there are always fresh chapters ahead.
And this is all thanks to Michael Faraday back in 1831, without whom this medium of communication would not be possible! I wonder what I'd be doing if Faraday had lived an alternative life....?
Post edited at 10:11
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In reply to Offwidth:
I meant 82. Braben was there.
> It already was in 1980 at Cambridge... all the Nat Sci Computer Scientists in my college were earning good money on the side writing software for the new computer boom and had a choice of excellent jobs, even if they didnt want to forge out on their own.
I meant 82. Braben was there.
In reply to Deadeye:
Funny how a few years made such a difference in computing back then
Funny how a few years made such a difference in computing back then
Post edited at 12:35
In reply to Shani:
It may sound a bit trite, but I'm sure your dad wouldn't want you to feel like that, just as I'm sure you wouldn't want that for your kids. I'm sure he would have been proud and happy of how your life has turned out.
> I feel awkward/guilty to be enjoying life when my dad can't.
It may sound a bit trite, but I'm sure your dad wouldn't want you to feel like that, just as I'm sure you wouldn't want that for your kids. I'm sure he would have been proud and happy of how your life has turned out.
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In reply to Flinticus:
When I moved up from Cubs to Scouts (aged about 10 and a bit) I really didn't enjoy it. My Dad (who was a Leader himself at the time albeit in a different Group) encouraged me to give it a bit longer and I did and it grew on me somewhat.
I'm still in Scouting and it's offered me all sorts of opportunities over the years. Given that my job is IT, I could well have turned out very differently without it - I might indeed not even be posting here, as the people with whom I first started climbing I know through Scouting.
When I moved up from Cubs to Scouts (aged about 10 and a bit) I really didn't enjoy it. My Dad (who was a Leader himself at the time albeit in a different Group) encouraged me to give it a bit longer and I did and it grew on me somewhat.
I'm still in Scouting and it's offered me all sorts of opportunities over the years. Given that my job is IT, I could well have turned out very differently without it - I might indeed not even be posting here, as the people with whom I first started climbing I know through Scouting.
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In reply to Offwidth:
It has kind-of stagnated for about the last 10 years or so pending the next paradigm shift, hasn't it?
I was at uni doing CS from 1997-2001, I think that was probably one of the most exciting periods for IT in recent years. (Though if I'd lived 10-15 years later I bet I'd have made a load of money on the side on mobile apps - I wrote software for fun back then but the distribution/publication channels were much harder to access if you didn't just want to give it away for free).
> Funny how a few years made such a difference in computing back then
It has kind-of stagnated for about the last 10 years or so pending the next paradigm shift, hasn't it?
I was at uni doing CS from 1997-2001, I think that was probably one of the most exciting periods for IT in recent years. (Though if I'd lived 10-15 years later I bet I'd have made a load of money on the side on mobile apps - I wrote software for fun back then but the distribution/publication channels were much harder to access if you didn't just want to give it away for free).
In reply to Flinticus:
I suppose I have had the usual turning points in my life, that have decided what I do for a job, who I am friends with, where I live, etc.
My dad said offered to pay for me to go to private secondary school (the local grammar school had just been abolished, and replaced with a comprehensive system in the area). I chose to stay with my primary school friends, and go to the comprehensive. Who knows what might have happened if I'd gone to the private school? Would my character have been significantly different, or was it already pretty determined by age 11? I left the comprehensive with the highest results in the school, having done not a lot of work, which backfired at sixth form; I'm not sure if a lack of work ethic towards study was in me before I went to school, or because I didn't need to work at school. Or maybe it was down to doing well if I thought I was doing well. I now have contact with only one person from primary school, and that's only at Christmas. I have no contact with anyone from secondary school (the primary school friend excepted).
My a-level choices at sixth form, and who I became friends with there was pretty formative; I am still friends with a small core I met there.
Then there's the choice of university, and subject. I had got into electronics as a hobby at school, and continued that at university, and now in my career. What else might I have done? Product design, perhaps, at the technical, rather than chunkily-contoured, pastel-coloured blob end. There are a few friends from university, based around the film society, that I am in infrequent contact with.
Job? I had an industrial year placement with an electronics company. I'm still there, having been employed by their research arm after graduating. My next turning point will be when I retire, I suspect. Which may not be many years away.
Then there is UKC. Yes, really; there is a sizeable bunch of people who I have met through UKC, and am still close friends with. Most of them have long since left UKC, but I still see them, or chat with them via email or facebook.
Then there are the 'what ifs' about girls I'd asked out, who weren't interested, or the relationships I ended because I wasn't besotted, which means that I've been on my own for most of my adult life. I'm not sure if I regret not having children; I love playing with other people's kids, but I'm not sure I could cope with the responsibility of my own...
I'm where I am now, and very rarely have any 'what if' thoughts. Then again, I very rarely have any 'what next' thoughts...
I suppose I have had the usual turning points in my life, that have decided what I do for a job, who I am friends with, where I live, etc.
My dad said offered to pay for me to go to private secondary school (the local grammar school had just been abolished, and replaced with a comprehensive system in the area). I chose to stay with my primary school friends, and go to the comprehensive. Who knows what might have happened if I'd gone to the private school? Would my character have been significantly different, or was it already pretty determined by age 11? I left the comprehensive with the highest results in the school, having done not a lot of work, which backfired at sixth form; I'm not sure if a lack of work ethic towards study was in me before I went to school, or because I didn't need to work at school. Or maybe it was down to doing well if I thought I was doing well. I now have contact with only one person from primary school, and that's only at Christmas. I have no contact with anyone from secondary school (the primary school friend excepted).
My a-level choices at sixth form, and who I became friends with there was pretty formative; I am still friends with a small core I met there.
Then there's the choice of university, and subject. I had got into electronics as a hobby at school, and continued that at university, and now in my career. What else might I have done? Product design, perhaps, at the technical, rather than chunkily-contoured, pastel-coloured blob end. There are a few friends from university, based around the film society, that I am in infrequent contact with.
Job? I had an industrial year placement with an electronics company. I'm still there, having been employed by their research arm after graduating. My next turning point will be when I retire, I suspect. Which may not be many years away.
Then there is UKC. Yes, really; there is a sizeable bunch of people who I have met through UKC, and am still close friends with. Most of them have long since left UKC, but I still see them, or chat with them via email or facebook.
Then there are the 'what ifs' about girls I'd asked out, who weren't interested, or the relationships I ended because I wasn't besotted, which means that I've been on my own for most of my adult life. I'm not sure if I regret not having children; I love playing with other people's kids, but I'm not sure I could cope with the responsibility of my own...
I'm where I am now, and very rarely have any 'what if' thoughts. Then again, I very rarely have any 'what next' thoughts...
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In reply to Flinticus:
As someone else said, we must all have many many such moments but when the outcome is not directly measureable/tangible, the impact or potential impact of a given decision is perhaps more difficult to claim/imagine.
I am afflicted with being able to remember a lot of the small moments, so, since you ask:
Deciding not to protest strongly when my Dad gave away, to the son of a family friend, my copy of Shakuntala Devi's book "Figuring: The Joy of Numbers" when I was about 12 and deep into it. I could have been an ace boffin mathematician by now.
Deciding against putting my hand up during a chemistry lesson when I was 13 or 14 and we were learning about carbon bonds (diamond and graphite). I wanted to ask "can it curl into spheres and tubes?". There is no way that I had heard of Buckminster Fullerene at that time. Maybe my teacher would have identified what a visionary I was, and I'd now be a top chemistry boffin.
Deciding to play shy and not ask out our French "assistante" when I was at sixth form college. We really clicked and I was subsequently told that she felt a bit lonely in her year here and that she was in fact quite keen on me. Damn it. I would then have cruised through an easy French degree and be living happily ever after in Perpignan with a beautiful and charming wife.
Making a very conscious decision at university to not hang out with the bland fake "nice people" who were on typical middle-class life and career paths (work diligently, get good degree and straight into good job, marry in mid-late 20s, 2.4 children etc) and to hang out with the "alternative" crowd and smoke a bit of weed and go out on the razz a bit too much. Resulted in low marks that meant that I was demoted from my M.Sci Physics with French (with a year in France) to a straight B.Sc, and even at that I "only" managed a 2:2. Would things have been much different now if I'd been more of a careerist, I wonder?
As someone else said, we must all have many many such moments but when the outcome is not directly measureable/tangible, the impact or potential impact of a given decision is perhaps more difficult to claim/imagine.
I am afflicted with being able to remember a lot of the small moments, so, since you ask:
Deciding not to protest strongly when my Dad gave away, to the son of a family friend, my copy of Shakuntala Devi's book "Figuring: The Joy of Numbers" when I was about 12 and deep into it. I could have been an ace boffin mathematician by now.
Deciding against putting my hand up during a chemistry lesson when I was 13 or 14 and we were learning about carbon bonds (diamond and graphite). I wanted to ask "can it curl into spheres and tubes?". There is no way that I had heard of Buckminster Fullerene at that time. Maybe my teacher would have identified what a visionary I was, and I'd now be a top chemistry boffin.
Deciding to play shy and not ask out our French "assistante" when I was at sixth form college. We really clicked and I was subsequently told that she felt a bit lonely in her year here and that she was in fact quite keen on me. Damn it. I would then have cruised through an easy French degree and be living happily ever after in Perpignan with a beautiful and charming wife.
Making a very conscious decision at university to not hang out with the bland fake "nice people" who were on typical middle-class life and career paths (work diligently, get good degree and straight into good job, marry in mid-late 20s, 2.4 children etc) and to hang out with the "alternative" crowd and smoke a bit of weed and go out on the razz a bit too much. Resulted in low marks that meant that I was demoted from my M.Sci Physics with French (with a year in France) to a straight B.Sc, and even at that I "only" managed a 2:2. Would things have been much different now if I'd been more of a careerist, I wonder?
Post edited at 16:21
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In reply to Blue Straggler:
Your time in uni is akin to mine. I even picked the city for the gig potential. I did a business diploma after graduation and 'mingled' with the scions of the rich, much as an octopus may silently flit through a sea of sharks.
Your time in uni is akin to mine. I even picked the city for the gig potential. I did a business diploma after graduation and 'mingled' with the scions of the rich, much as an octopus may silently flit through a sea of sharks.
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In reply to Flinticus:
1st year of uni. Didn't work hard enough and failed so many exams I'd have had no life in the summer or second year due to resits. Had a mate who worked for the local Telco who suggested I try for a job there as it was a good place to work and they paid for your training. Got a job as a trainee engineer with them and have been there 20 years now. Had I stayed at Uni I'd have ended up leaving the island due to no jobs in my field of interest and almost certainly never met my amazing wife or Ex who I had some good times with.
1st year of uni. Didn't work hard enough and failed so many exams I'd have had no life in the summer or second year due to resits. Had a mate who worked for the local Telco who suggested I try for a job there as it was a good place to work and they paid for your training. Got a job as a trainee engineer with them and have been there 20 years now. Had I stayed at Uni I'd have ended up leaving the island due to no jobs in my field of interest and almost certainly never met my amazing wife or Ex who I had some good times with.
In reply to Flinticus:
In 1971 I was in the final year of a Mechanical Engineering Degree Course sponsored by Rolls Royce Motors and aiming for a job as a Development Engineer. That April RR went into Receivership because of the debts of the Aero Division. The Car business was buoyant but nevertheless there was a freeze on new appointments - I was made redundant. My girlfriend of the time had already made me think of new directions but the kick made me shift into an environmental application of my degree that eventually led me to getting into climbing - then outdoor education and a new career as a trainer. Never looked back but still followed the fortunes of the great motor companies (RR & Bentley) with great affection. In my later days as a trainer I worked with the new Rolls Royce motor company and one of their sub-contractors who made the radiator - the full circle was closed.
In 1971 I was in the final year of a Mechanical Engineering Degree Course sponsored by Rolls Royce Motors and aiming for a job as a Development Engineer. That April RR went into Receivership because of the debts of the Aero Division. The Car business was buoyant but nevertheless there was a freeze on new appointments - I was made redundant. My girlfriend of the time had already made me think of new directions but the kick made me shift into an environmental application of my degree that eventually led me to getting into climbing - then outdoor education and a new career as a trainer. Never looked back but still followed the fortunes of the great motor companies (RR & Bentley) with great affection. In my later days as a trainer I worked with the new Rolls Royce motor company and one of their sub-contractors who made the radiator - the full circle was closed.
In reply to john arran:
What did you do in Kosovo? I was there briefly in I guess 2001, I did six months working for UNEP, we were chasing depleted uranium (well, I was the bag man for unit leader who provided the political cover to the scientists who were chasing depleted uranium)!
I looked at joining the Army when I finished my MA, I was just too old at the time, although they shortly afterwards changed that. If I had joined I would have been a recently commissioned junior officer when we invaded Afghanistan. I think my late 20s and early 30s could have been very different if I was a few months younger.
What did you do in Kosovo? I was there briefly in I guess 2001, I did six months working for UNEP, we were chasing depleted uranium (well, I was the bag man for unit leader who provided the political cover to the scientists who were chasing depleted uranium)!
I looked at joining the Army when I finished my MA, I was just too old at the time, although they shortly afterwards changed that. If I had joined I would have been a recently commissioned junior officer when we invaded Afghanistan. I think my late 20s and early 30s could have been very different if I was a few months younger.
In reply to TobyA:
I was there to help develop software for the election which was being run at the time by the UN. Since then I have become something of an international election specialist, while still focusing largely on the technological aspects of the process.
> What did you do in Kosovo?
I was there to help develop software for the election which was being run at the time by the UN. Since then I have become something of an international election specialist, while still focusing largely on the technological aspects of the process.
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In reply to Flinticus:
Interesting thread, prompting a bit of pondering and reflection. I’ve enjoyed reading everyone’s responses: happy, sad, resigned and bewildered...
I’m reminded of a Ben Folds lyric: “Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls brought me here.” I feel like that. There are many things which weren’t necessarily positive in themselves but have brought me to where I am and who I am, and I wouldn’t really change any of it.
Anyway, the biggest divergent point for me was getting accepted onto the degree course of my dreams. There was only one in the country in my field that was worth doing back in 1996 and it was very competitive. If I hadn’t got onto it I would have done mechanical engineering at Imperial rather than going into music, and everything would have been different. Would I even have started climbing (something I was introduced to at Uni in Guildford)? Then everything really would be so different I honestly cannot envisage what my life would look like or what kind of person I’d be.
The other big one would be deciding to quit a job I didn’t enjoy in 2007, following the unexpected death of my father, to take some time out and tour Africa on the Hot Rock truck. I met my now wife there and the rest, as they say...
Interesting thread, prompting a bit of pondering and reflection. I’ve enjoyed reading everyone’s responses: happy, sad, resigned and bewildered...
I’m reminded of a Ben Folds lyric: “Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls brought me here.” I feel like that. There are many things which weren’t necessarily positive in themselves but have brought me to where I am and who I am, and I wouldn’t really change any of it.
Anyway, the biggest divergent point for me was getting accepted onto the degree course of my dreams. There was only one in the country in my field that was worth doing back in 1996 and it was very competitive. If I hadn’t got onto it I would have done mechanical engineering at Imperial rather than going into music, and everything would have been different. Would I even have started climbing (something I was introduced to at Uni in Guildford)? Then everything really would be so different I honestly cannot envisage what my life would look like or what kind of person I’d be.
The other big one would be deciding to quit a job I didn’t enjoy in 2007, following the unexpected death of my father, to take some time out and tour Africa on the Hot Rock truck. I met my now wife there and the rest, as they say...
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In reply to ChrisBrooke:
Tonmeister...?
> There was only one in the country in my field that was worth doing back in 1996 [...] Uni in Guildford
Tonmeister...?
In reply to Flinticus:
At 17 I applied and was accepted to join the army, Intake got delayed for 6 months due to thatcher's cut backs and in between I changed my mind and got a decent job, met my now ex wife and we had kids before I was in my mid twenties.
Often wonder about the path not taken and where it might have led .
At 17 I applied and was accepted to join the army, Intake got delayed for 6 months due to thatcher's cut backs and in between I changed my mind and got a decent job, met my now ex wife and we had kids before I was in my mid twenties.
Often wonder about the path not taken and where it might have led .
In reply to ChrisBrooke:
That's part of the wonder: the person you would have become. What of you would persist through the possibilities?
That's part of the wonder: the person you would have become. What of you would persist through the possibilities?
In reply to Clauso:
Well, so could anyone...
Oh sorry, wrong reference.
> I could've been a contender...
Well, so could anyone...
Oh sorry, wrong reference.
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In reply to Flinticus:
I can't be bothered to read all the replies, so somebody may have already asked, but have you read 'Dark Matter'?
I can't be bothered to read all the replies, so somebody may have already asked, but have you read 'Dark Matter'?
In reply to captain paranoia:
Correct. Now, 17 years into my career, most folks I run into are Tonmeisters it feels like. Abbey Road is full of ‘em for a start, and we record there most weeks...
> Tonmeister...?
Correct. Now, 17 years into my career, most folks I run into are Tonmeisters it feels like. Abbey Road is full of ‘em for a start, and we record there most weeks...
In reply to Flinticus:
Outward Bound. Which I was sent on and obeyed.
Had spent first 18 years doing all the unruly stuff you do as a lad from the country (football, fishing, setting fire to things, trying to injure your mates with catapults...normal things).
Company I was a trainee with decided to send me to OBMS Eskdale for 3 weeks. I bought 20quid boots from the local market, broke them in by running the 5 miles to the building site I was working on. Borrowed everything else.
After 8 hours on a train going further north than I had ever been I pitched up in Eskdake late at night.
The view of Gable, Lingmell, and Kirkfell the following morning changed the course of my life...and no doubt that of my future kids too.
Outward Bound. Which I was sent on and obeyed.
Had spent first 18 years doing all the unruly stuff you do as a lad from the country (football, fishing, setting fire to things, trying to injure your mates with catapults...normal things).
Company I was a trainee with decided to send me to OBMS Eskdale for 3 weeks. I bought 20quid boots from the local market, broke them in by running the 5 miles to the building site I was working on. Borrowed everything else.
After 8 hours on a train going further north than I had ever been I pitched up in Eskdake late at night.
The view of Gable, Lingmell, and Kirkfell the following morning changed the course of my life...and no doubt that of my future kids too.
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In reply to Flinticus:
After my girlfriend left me in 2012, I had a few months of turmoil and temporarily moving back to my parents in Newcastle from London, before I was asked if I could do an 8 week run on a circus in Hyde Park for Winter Wonderland (in my usual role in event lighting, not as a clown...). This led to dating the cute American trapeze artist, and to us breaking up very shortly into their summer season.
Fast forward a few months, and I was dropped into the position of either accepting a job as a theatre technician at a public school in Rutland, or taking a job selling tickets with the circus, whose previous person had departed mid-tour. I ran away with the circus, had four months of great fun touring small towns in Scotland, and was offered more work over winter again. I declined, fell back into the world of concerts and corporate events in London, and often wondered what might have been if I'd taken up their offer. One of the major factors of not doing so was that I'd have had very little time to climb.
More recently I've applied to join the Army, so I'll come back to this thread in a few months time when I'll hopefully be on my way to Sandhurst...
After my girlfriend left me in 2012, I had a few months of turmoil and temporarily moving back to my parents in Newcastle from London, before I was asked if I could do an 8 week run on a circus in Hyde Park for Winter Wonderland (in my usual role in event lighting, not as a clown...). This led to dating the cute American trapeze artist, and to us breaking up very shortly into their summer season.
Fast forward a few months, and I was dropped into the position of either accepting a job as a theatre technician at a public school in Rutland, or taking a job selling tickets with the circus, whose previous person had departed mid-tour. I ran away with the circus, had four months of great fun touring small towns in Scotland, and was offered more work over winter again. I declined, fell back into the world of concerts and corporate events in London, and often wondered what might have been if I'd taken up their offer. One of the major factors of not doing so was that I'd have had very little time to climb.
More recently I've applied to join the Army, so I'll come back to this thread in a few months time when I'll hopefully be on my way to Sandhurst...
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In reply to Flinticus:
The obvious one is choosing to go to University of Sussex where I met my future wife. After that, deciding to apply for my first job in Leek rather than others I considered in the south of England, which led to a couple of my sixth form students introducing me to climbing.
The obvious one is choosing to go to University of Sussex where I met my future wife. After that, deciding to apply for my first job in Leek rather than others I considered in the south of England, which led to a couple of my sixth form students introducing me to climbing.
In reply to Flinticus:
40 cm... what would have been...
young bloke at first year of uni, always sitting in the second to last row. a mate bets me a sixpack of beer that I can't throw my waterbottle (Plastic, still 3/4 full) from where we sit into the bin in front (disclaimer: I could never throw anything to save my life, but a bet is a bet)
class is finished, I throw the bottle, it does a nice arc towards the bin. Unforunately it richocheted of the lamp hanging in the middle of the room (if I had tried to hit that, I would have surely missed), and hit the Blackboard 40cm behind the professor's head (who was nearing 70, hard of hearing). The eager students talking to the prof were quite shocked, as was I.
so that was the story when I was nearly expelled from uni for maiming a prof which surely would have led to a much different life.
Or if I had gotten a bit more air in my (very poor) attempt at a backflip on snowboard (landing with my head&shoulder above and my board below the lip of the jump), resulting in a much graver injury than a few month off sports (for a few blocked vertebrae)
Or that time when the car in the construction site crossed the median 10 m in front of me in a tunnel...
I am really grateful for being where I am now, for my life had many, many, many chances to be a lot shorter (and that's just counting the ones I know of) and a lot more unpleasant.
40 cm... what would have been...
young bloke at first year of uni, always sitting in the second to last row. a mate bets me a sixpack of beer that I can't throw my waterbottle (Plastic, still 3/4 full) from where we sit into the bin in front (disclaimer: I could never throw anything to save my life, but a bet is a bet)
class is finished, I throw the bottle, it does a nice arc towards the bin. Unforunately it richocheted of the lamp hanging in the middle of the room (if I had tried to hit that, I would have surely missed), and hit the Blackboard 40cm behind the professor's head (who was nearing 70, hard of hearing). The eager students talking to the prof were quite shocked, as was I.
so that was the story when I was nearly expelled from uni for maiming a prof which surely would have led to a much different life.
Or if I had gotten a bit more air in my (very poor) attempt at a backflip on snowboard (landing with my head&shoulder above and my board below the lip of the jump), resulting in a much graver injury than a few month off sports (for a few blocked vertebrae)
Or that time when the car in the construction site crossed the median 10 m in front of me in a tunnel...
I am really grateful for being where I am now, for my life had many, many, many chances to be a lot shorter (and that's just counting the ones I know of) and a lot more unpleasant.
In reply to Flinticus:
1970s Had a chance to leave school to take a job, or stay at school, or leave and go to FE, decided to take job which offered day release, thought it might give me about 4 years , lasted over 40 years.
What if......, who knows?
1970s Had a chance to leave school to take a job, or stay at school, or leave and go to FE, decided to take job which offered day release, thought it might give me about 4 years , lasted over 40 years.
What if......, who knows?
In reply to Flinticus:
Made another one recently (well about 1 year back, but it comes to fruition soon.)
Decided rather than work for another 5 years, we'd take out my superannuation as a lump sum, and live off it for that time, and then live off my wife's super following that.
So many things could go wrong on this.
But there again, I could have chosen to continue working for another 5 years, in what is a pretty high stress field, and then drop dead a day after I retire.
Made another one recently (well about 1 year back, but it comes to fruition soon.)
Decided rather than work for another 5 years, we'd take out my superannuation as a lump sum, and live off it for that time, and then live off my wife's super following that.
So many things could go wrong on this.
But there again, I could have chosen to continue working for another 5 years, in what is a pretty high stress field, and then drop dead a day after I retire.
Post edited at 01:44
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In reply to Flinticus:
Standing on a hand rail instead of the platform it was surrounding to disconnect an acid pipeline, which should have been empty.
I lost a tiny bit of nose, instead of being completely covered head to foot. It makes my shudder every time I think of it.
Standing on a hand rail instead of the platform it was surrounding to disconnect an acid pipeline, which should have been empty.
I lost a tiny bit of nose, instead of being completely covered head to foot. It makes my shudder every time I think of it.
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In reply to Rog Wilko:
Blimey indeed, the alternative me would have been brown bread, I think.
So lucky, and all on a niggle in the back of my mind, not the safest thing to do stand on the handle rail, twenty feet above the ground, but if I hadn't....
Funnily enough I'd forgotten about this until recently, talking about "luck"
> Blimey!
Blimey indeed, the alternative me would have been brown bread, I think.
So lucky, and all on a niggle in the back of my mind, not the safest thing to do stand on the handle rail, twenty feet above the ground, but if I hadn't....
Funnily enough I'd forgotten about this until recently, talking about "luck"
In reply to Andy Clarke:
This sounds familiar. I actually got as far as starting a post-doc before coming to the conclusion that traditional academia wasn't for me - as you say, original ideas aren't my thing. I walked out on a whim and went through various jobs that didn't really click while trying to find a niche, before discovering software development. In the end I came full circle, and now work as a software developer on a functional genomics database. Now I have a job I love and as the database I work on is for protozoan parasites, I often get to travel and teach in the areas where they are endemic - S America, Africa and SE Asia. I have just returned from a week teaching in Malawi which was an amazing experience.
There are of course other moments - I am sure everyone has many.
> Having done well at Uni I was contemplating a possible future as an academic. At the last minute decided against, came home, got married and worked in a factory for a year. Then went into teaching. As the years went by, realised I had relatively little talent for original ideas, but did have some for explaining other people’s. Ended up spending twelve years as a secondary head, which I found immensely exciting, worthwhile and rewarding. Lucky.
This sounds familiar. I actually got as far as starting a post-doc before coming to the conclusion that traditional academia wasn't for me - as you say, original ideas aren't my thing. I walked out on a whim and went through various jobs that didn't really click while trying to find a niche, before discovering software development. In the end I came full circle, and now work as a software developer on a functional genomics database. Now I have a job I love and as the database I work on is for protozoan parasites, I often get to travel and teach in the areas where they are endemic - S America, Africa and SE Asia. I have just returned from a week teaching in Malawi which was an amazing experience.
There are of course other moments - I am sure everyone has many.
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In reply to krikoman:
Yes, best not to ignore that little niggle, that almost subliminal 5 second warning provided by your subconscious risk assessment equipment while you are busy doing something else that seems more important...
> So lucky, and all on a niggle in the back of my mind,
Yes, best not to ignore that little niggle, that almost subliminal 5 second warning provided by your subconscious risk assessment equipment while you are busy doing something else that seems more important...
1
In reply to Flinticus:
This is a great thread and racking my brain to contribute I realise I have never had a pivotal moment career-wise and have been fortunate to take the path I planned. However one evening I was soloing at Fairy Battery and slipped. I decided to topple to the left in the hope I could see a jug to grab and other than a minor rotator cuff tear I got away with it. I went back a few years later and found the wall to the right completely blank.
This is a great thread and racking my brain to contribute I realise I have never had a pivotal moment career-wise and have been fortunate to take the path I planned. However one evening I was soloing at Fairy Battery and slipped. I decided to topple to the left in the hope I could see a jug to grab and other than a minor rotator cuff tear I got away with it. I went back a few years later and found the wall to the right completely blank.
2
In reply to Toccata:
Do pivotal moments have to be dramatic? We make huge numbers of decisions, (or fail to make them), every day.
The knock-on effects from these minor events probably influence the trajectory of our lives as much as the big 'brush with death' events.
(Just not as interesting to read).
Do pivotal moments have to be dramatic? We make huge numbers of decisions, (or fail to make them), every day.
The knock-on effects from these minor events probably influence the trajectory of our lives as much as the big 'brush with death' events.
(Just not as interesting to read).
1
In reply to Flinticus:
I kissed a girl in the tunnel nightclub in Glasgow in 1998 when in first year at uni. She gave me glandular fever, I spent three months on my back, had to sit first year again, so left. 8 years later I was back at the same uni to do civil engineering. I wonder what I would be up to if I'd stuck at aquatic bioscience? I doubt I'd love it as much as what I do now.
I kissed a girl in the tunnel nightclub in Glasgow in 1998 when in first year at uni. She gave me glandular fever, I spent three months on my back, had to sit first year again, so left. 8 years later I was back at the same uni to do civil engineering. I wonder what I would be up to if I'd stuck at aquatic bioscience? I doubt I'd love it as much as what I do now.
1
In reply to Ridge:
No, but it was inevitable that the thread would shift toward known life-changing events. I tried to put some undramatic ones in, as did many other early respondees.
I can add an undramatic one...
Late 2004 at a Le Tigre gig where I was on the guest list as a guest and friend of the support band, I was told that Scarlett Johansson was also there on the guest list and I decided not to ask if I could meet her and pretend not to really know who she was and say "hey were you the girl in that Eva Mendes nanny film where the boy gets turned into a pig?" She'd have appreciated a change from the usual "nice arse at the beginning of Lost in Translation" that she was getting A LOT back then, and we'd have got married and blah blah :-D
> Do pivotal moments have to be dramatic? We make huge numbers of decisions, (or fail to make them), every day.
No, but it was inevitable that the thread would shift toward known life-changing events. I tried to put some undramatic ones in, as did many other early respondees.
I can add an undramatic one...
Late 2004 at a Le Tigre gig where I was on the guest list as a guest and friend of the support band, I was told that Scarlett Johansson was also there on the guest list and I decided not to ask if I could meet her and pretend not to really know who she was and say "hey were you the girl in that Eva Mendes nanny film where the boy gets turned into a pig?" She'd have appreciated a change from the usual "nice arse at the beginning of Lost in Translation" that she was getting A LOT back then, and we'd have got married and blah blah :-D
In reply to Blue Straggler:
I let Alison Ross poke a stone in my ear at nursery when I was 4 years old. Without this I would have become leader of the free world and we'd all be living in harmony.
I let Alison Ross poke a stone in my ear at nursery when I was 4 years old. Without this I would have become leader of the free world and we'd all be living in harmony.
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