In reply to UKC Articles:
Now he has a distinctive style, it's time for some (affectionate) satire by someone wittier than me such as
"Parners cackled manically as he donned his now-standard headgear of tin foil helmet. I was glad it was his lead as I couldn't face the next pitch which consisted of frozen overhanging gravel. I had got out of the lead by belaying off my eyelashes embedded in tears frozen to the grim, bare, unloving granite. As Parners, seemingly oblivious to the cold in his tweed romper suit, merrily climbed over me to get at the nightmare above, I could feel my eyelashes ripping out one by one. Soon we would be soloing and without my eyelashes I would be soloing with eyes full of gravel. I tried to feel brave but I felt it in my frozen bones that a hero is only someone too cowardly to run away." etc