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How not to do a job interview.

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 The New NickB 12 Apr 2011
I an currently sat in Tameside General Hospital after passing out mid way through a job interview.

Very low blood sugar it seems and I have to have a check for diabetes.

What is the worst thing to happen to you in a job interview?
 Only a hill 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:
Explosive diarrhea?
 Mike Stretford 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: Well at least you were in a good place to pass out. Are you ok now?

Worst thing.. brain melt when presented with technical question I could not answer immediately.. pretty tame.
 Reach>Talent 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:
Sounds unpleasant, I once had to sit through an interview with someone who had set their hair on fire five minutes earlier trying to have a smoke on a windy day; the smell was pretty offputting.

OP The New NickB 12 Apr 2011
In reply to Papillon:

I wasn't in the hospital when I passed out.

I don't feel too bad, put keen to find out why my blood sugar is low, as it don't think it is diet related.
 winhill 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Have you heard if you've got a second interview yet?
 Tall Clare 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Hope you're okay.

On the other side of the table, I once had to interview a very strange woman who kept talking at length about sausage casings. It was my first time interviewing anyone and I really struggled to keep a straight face.
OP The New NickB 12 Apr 2011
In reply to winhill:
> (In reply to The New NickB)
>
> Have you heard if you've got a second interview yet?

They were very nice about it, told me to give them a ring tomorrow.
 Clarence 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

I went for a job as a safety officer at a university lab and broke my thumb on the door handle while entering the interview room. At the end of the interview the interviewer asked me if I was alright as I had gone very pale and I showed him my oddly shaped thumb which had gone black and purple. I got the job anyway.

When interviewing I have had people:
- vomit
- wet themselves
- sneeze blood all over the table
- find a hamster (alive) in their jacket pocket
- pass out and hit themselves on the table

One fellow just back from trekking in Sumatra managed the holy trinity of simultaneous bodily evacuations and had to be hospitalised from the interview room.
 Reach>Talent 12 Apr 2011
In reply to Clarence:
> When interviewing I have had people:
> - vomit
> - wet themselves
> - sneeze blood all over the table
> - find a hamster (alive) in their jacket pocket
> - pass out and hit themselves on the table
>
> One fellow just back from trekking in Sumatra managed the holy trinity of simultaneous bodily evacuations and had to be hospitalised from the interview room.


Still working in academia by any chance? I actaully laughed out loud at this and some of the people in my office are looking at me oddly (more so than normal)!
 Clarence 12 Apr 2011
In reply to Reach>Talent:
> (In reply to Clarence)
> Still working in academia by any chance?

No most of them were while I was working for Rolls Royce. The candidates that the graduate careers fair team sent us were sometimes just to make up the numbers.
 TobyA 12 Apr 2011
In reply to Clarence:

> When interviewing I have had people:
> - vomit
> - wet themselves
> - sneeze blood all over the table
> - find a hamster (alive) in their jacket pocket
> - pass out and hit themselves on the table

What do you do to them?!? I think we need more details as they are all so wonderful it hard to believe them!
 Rubbishy 12 Apr 2011
In reply to Clarence:
> (In reply to The New NickB)
>
>
>
> When interviewing I have had people:
> - vomit
> - wet themselves
> - sneeze blood all over the table
> - find a hamster (alive) in their jacket pocket
> - pass out and hit themselves on the table
>
> One fellow just back from trekking in Sumatra managed the holy trinity of simultaneous bodily evacuations and had to be hospitalised from the interview room.

Thank you. My day is now complete. Absolutely priceless

hamster


in pocket


alive





 EeeByGum 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: It's not a patch on you but...

I spilled my glass of water over the table at an interview - didn't get the job.

At the next interview I went for I had a load of coffee spilled over me. I got the job!!
 Toerag 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: one of my colleagues passed out in an interview due to not eating breakfast and a hot interview room. They gave him a second chance and he got the job over me, b'stard! I had the last laugh though as it turned out to be a load of stress for little extra reward
 iforwms 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: Mind going blank on technical questions which I knew the answers to, the minute I walked out of the room.

Also when asked, "why did you say ... in your application", "thought it sounded good, it got me this interview didn't it?". Needless to say, I didn't get the job.
 Clarence 12 Apr 2011
In reply to TobyA:
> (In reply to Clarence)
> What do you do to them?!? I think we need more details as they are all so wonderful it hard to believe them!

Vomit was in the wastepaper bin so I just gave the lad a drink of water and five minutes to compose himself. He was really, really nervous.

The young lady who wet herself went off to the lavatory and was never seen again. I think it was a combination of nerves and the fact that the lavatories were particularly grim. Fortunately we only have the plastic kidney-cracker chairs so the chair was cleanable.

The chap who sneezed blood all over the place was sent to the first aider, he said he was prone to nosebleeds and had hayfever, occasionally the two coincided.

The hamster was an unnoticed good luck present from a four year old son, we put the little fellow (hamster) in a cardboard box with a piece of cereal bar and he was quite happy until the interview ended.

I have to admit that it was me who passed out and hit the table, with some force. I'm not too good at wearing ties and frequently go dizzy when forced to wear one after going tieless for a long time.

The trekker wound up in hospital for quite a while with all kinds of problems but we re-interviewed him for another job later that year and he ended up on my team.

They were the few memorable ones out of maybe 400-450 interviews over five years. Over 80% of the rest were uncomfortable monosyllabic gruntings with people who thought jeans and an oxfam tweed jacket were suitable interview wear.
 DougG 12 Apr 2011
In reply to John Rushby:

Reminds me (vaguely) of a story from last week's Herald Diary, had me sniggering all day.

“The landlord of a pub beside a well-known Glasgow dog track [almost certainly Shawfield - DG] told me that race nights were his busiest evenings when the pub was full with punters and dog-owners with their dugs. On one evening the door opened and a regular whom he had previously barred asked if the ban was still in place. When he was told it was, his reaction to the unwelcome news was to tip out three live rabbits he was carrying in a bag into the centre of the pub and make a hasty retreat.”

 gethin_allen 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:
I went for an interview for a PhD studentship and got passed about a few other lab heads while I was there. In one interview with a person I already knew from previous experience to be a total arse I was asked "Why did you apply to do a PhD in my lab?" So I replied quite honestly "I didn't apply for a PhD in your lab, I applied for one in Prof. X's (name removed for anonymity~) lab" fortunately I got the one I wanted as I wasn't offered the other one surprisingly.
 wilkie14c 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:
I had a female boss who got off by opening her legs A LA basic instict style and watching the interviewee's reactions. She did it to me several times and 'winked', dunno if it was to test out the candidates ability to function under stress or it was for her own kinky stuff. funny but extremly embarrassing
 CarolineMc 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: hope you're feeling better now nick? Good luck with talking to them tomorrow... at least you won't be one they'll forget!

As for the low blood sugar, might just be a combo of food, warmth, tiredness?! I suffer from it so regularly that I carry a cereal bar everywhere with me! Nothing medical though, just one of those things. Hope you get to the bottom of it.

Co:
 mypyrex 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: I once asked a candidate on a promotion board what he knew about qangos. His reply: "The only qango I know is Jonny Kwago the wrestler"
 jonfun21 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Once interviewed a candidate who sang a couple of her answers to me. She also answered "To become prime minister" to my question on what she would like to achieve during her career at the company. Noting the job was as a business analyst in a corporate strategy team for a telecoms company!

Worrying thing was she was one of the highest scoring candidates at the telephone interview stage.
 Toby S 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

I applied for a job as a salesman with Space Kitchens in Inverness about 6 years ago. When I turned up they left me sitting in an empty office on my own for about 30 minutes and when someone did turn up he asked 'Do you believe in starting off on the right foot pal?' I replied that yes, I'd like to think I did. To which he replied 'Gonnae move your f*cking car then it's in my space'. He then ushered me out the building so I could move out of 'his' space, which wasn't marked as being reserved.

I moved my car. Home. And then phoned up their Head Office to inform them that they had a prize tw*t in their midst.

I had another one where the interviewer fell asleep during the interview and another where I got into a shouting match with a member of the panel about animal right... I'm still not sure what that was about!

king_of_gibraltar 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

As soon as I read the thread title I though of the question: ''What does IT stand for Jen?''.
 Alex Slipchuk 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Attend with Norovirus, completley dehydrated, no sleap, but since the intetrview was at 9am in Edinburgh and after 2 pit stops on the M8 hard shoulder, although I was unable to re-appoint without the late and lame excuse of being ill, I still managed to attend and answer all the questions. No second interview as 2 of the panel contracted the virus.
 Trangia 12 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Arrived dead on time for a job interview with Wimpey's only to find that I had gone to the wrong address.

Went for an interview for an assistant's job with a firm of Chartered Surveyors. The guy who interviewed me apologised, but said the boss was sick and had asked him to stand in instead. Half way through the interview it started to seem stange as he was asking me lots of questions unrelated to the job of an assistant. Gradually it dawned on both of us that he had confused my application with that for the post of a branch manager, which had been advertised at the same time.

Full of apologies he stopped the interview. Then he said " Hey! I like you and the way you have been conducting yourself throughout this interview. Would you be interested in the manager's vacancy rather than the assistant's one you applied for?"

I was not at that stage fully qualified and was awaiting the results of my final exams. The manager's job required a fully qualified Surveyor. He said "if you have passed your finals the job is yours, do you want it?"

I said yes and 3 weeks later when I learned I had passed my finals I got the manager job.
In reply to The New NickB:

I turned up a month late for an interview, that was embarrassing. Still got the job though. Hated it, left in less time than I was late. Which is ironic.
Clauso 13 Apr 2011
In reply to Toby S:
>
> I applied for a job as a salesman with Space Kitchens in Inverness about 6 years ago...

Space Kitchens. To boldly go...

... The guy that you refer to sounds like a proper see you next Tuesday, mind.
 Deri Jones 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: Bad luck! At least you weren't in the car on the way home when you passed out like on guy I interviewed. We had a phone call from his mum saying that he was in the local hospital but was OK. Luckily he'd only been doing about 20mph through the local village and used 5 of the locals cars to decelerate. Also very lucky it was a quiet day - normally in summer that road is mobbed with kids and people off to the beach.
Love the hamster story!
 EeeByGum 13 Apr 2011
In reply to blanchie14c:
> (In reply to The New NickB)
> I had a female boss who got off by opening her legs A LA basic instict style and watching the interviewee's reactions.

You should have told her that she had laddered her tights!
ashaw 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: I once sat at the end of a huge table with a panel of 4 people opposite me. When my interview finished as i walked out they all burst out laughing. It turns out partway through the interview I had picked up a paperclip and started playing with it. However i must have got bored as apparently i placed it on the table and flicked it across the table between a couple of panel members (still got the job though)
cheers
allan
Knitting Norah 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Only ever missed getting one job I applied for and for what reason I don't know. However that should never happen again because I retire tomorrow!

OP The New NickB 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

been back today to finish the interview, went a lot better I stayed conscious right the way through. Equal opps interviewing meant I could not revisit the couple of questions I staggered through yesterday, this might work against me because I don't think I was particularly lucid or coherent, given that my body was crashing and I was about to black out.

I will let you know how I get on.

In terms of the cause of the hypoglycemia, I am going to get some more tests done, but also look at a few minor dietary changes.
 northernmonki 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

Some very funny stories there!!

When it comes to 'winging it' in a job interview, the top prize has to go to this chap. The look of surpise on his face is priceless!

http://m.youtube.com/watch?gl=GB&client=mv-google&hl=en-GB&v=pd...
 Scarab9 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

my ex, for a really simple job in a warehouse, had a bad nosebleed during an interview. She asked to nip to the loos and was followed by the 5 people interviewing her (that's right...5...for basically someone to move boxes) who then made her conduct the rest of the interview in the toilets while she tried to stop from bleeding.

I think if I'd have been there I'd have kicked off rather strongly and there'd be a few more nosebleeds
 Reach>Talent 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:
Actually my worst job interview experience has happened twice, where by I arrived at the interview with a job description for the wrong job thanks to the recruiters.

"Ah MKean, I see you are here for the lab assistant role"
"Er, no. I'm here for the senior scientist role"
"Ah, well we'll interview you anyway"
 Steve John B 13 Apr 2011
In reply to Clarence:
>
> The hamster was an unnoticed good luck present from a four year old son, we put the little fellow (hamster) in a cardboard box with a piece of cereal bar and he was quite happy until the interview ended.

I like the way you've pointed out it was the hamster and not the son that went in the box! Had a mild bout of 'hysteria in a really quiet office' at that

Did they get the job? (The parent, not the hamster or the son)
 yorkshireman 13 Apr 2011
In reply to Reach>Talent:

About 10 years ago I took the day off work to travel down to London from Oxford for an interview for a consulting job in Tower 42. The company had no office of its own and kept its consultants scattered across the country and we would only meet on client sites so were using a Regus serviced office there.

Anyway, when I got there it turns out all the interviews that day were being conducted in Leeds and there was no-one there at all! The recruitment agent had messed up - so I went for a quick beer in the bar up there and got stung £8 for a bottle of Becks!

I eventually met the MD and had my interview in a Costa near Reading train station - eventually got the job though!
 mypyrex 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: I went for an interview about twelve years ago. The interviewer was a black female. I was 53 at the time.

Conversation went:

Interviewer: I'm a black female and a lot younger than you; would you have a problem with that?

Me: No, but it sounds as if you might.
ashaw 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: I had an interview last summer for a job for uni in the north west as an outdoor pursuits lecturer. Unfortunatly I was away in Morocco at the time running an exped for world challenge. They called me on the wrong mobile phone which meant the interview cost me almost 300.00 in telephone charges, and to make it worse I had to discuss a powerpoint presentation whilst sat on a minibus full of kids one of whom was sat next to me chucking up in a plastic bag. i had earlier given my window seat to the teacher who was feeling ill. During the conversation we lost signal 3 times. Needless to say i didnt get the job , i couldnt sell ice creams going at that speed let alone myself for a job!!
KTT 13 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: Did they ask you to justify the PFI deals. . . .seriously thoguh hope you're better soon.
 colina 13 Apr 2011
mate of mine was attending an inteview whilst quenching his dry mouth with a cup of water and asked the old classic
"have you any questions you would like to ask us"?

reply being yes i have actually "can i have a biscuit!"

he did,nt get the job.
OP The New NickB 14 Apr 2011
In reply to KTT:
> (In reply to The New NickB) Did they ask you to justify the PFI deals. . . .seriously thoguh hope you're better soon.

No they asked difficult questions. I am fine now.
 Pauline 14 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB: this has been a great thread and has amused me greatly... laughing is an 'interesting' experience with some gall bladder thing going on (read extremely painful)but it has cheered me up no end!

Thanks guys!
OP The New NickB 15 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

I did not get the job, not surprised really, as it came down to my answering of the two questions where I was a bit swimmy to say the least.

The good news is I got an email from my Service Director yesterday, he wants to talk about extra responsibilities and an upwards regrading to go with it.
Mac1982 15 Apr 2011
In reply to The New NickB:

I once interviewed someone who when asked what her weaknesses were replied "chocolate".

Brilliant.

she got the job.
 Choss Weasel 15 Apr 2011
In reply to: I've had one or two embarrassing job interviews. I only recently found out that it's frowned upon to masturbate during an interview. It's political correctness gone mad!
 ThunderCat 15 Apr 2011
In reply to Choss Weasel:

I wish I could find the FamilY Guy clip, where Peter remembers his worst interview and involves:

Interviewer "So Peter, where do you see yourself in four years?"

Peter, looks at interviewers family photo of wife and son and thinks
: "Don't say 'doing your wife'"

Peter - "Err, doing your son?"
 Choss Weasel 15 Apr 2011
In reply to ThunderCat: Oh yeah that one was so funny!
 ThunderCat 15 Apr 2011
In reply to grumpybearpantsclimbinggoat:

Thats the one!

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