/ Your cat's official and unofficial names
Ginger Cat (he's ginger!)
McScringle (the Scottish cat)
And now, as an homage to the life of Pi, he seems to be going as Richard Parker :)
So, how many names does your cat have??
Stinky wee shite
Get off the Bed
Fat Ginger Git
Lazy Ginger Git
Useless Ginger Git
I don't have any cats but my mother has four, none of who's names I know. I refer to them variously as black cat, cow (black and white one), the shit one and silver tiger. Cat's don't know their names anyway so what's the point?
Rental Cat is called Kizzie:
Little old lady
Milly (black, pretty, angry):
Mill Mill Milly Mill Milly Milly Mill Mill (she particularly hates that one)
Eric (ginger, cuddly, portly):
Pookie (this might as well be her name. She's pookalicious)
Why yes, I am ashamed, now you come to mention it.
real name: Dyno
(he is full of personality so it generally depends on what he's doing)
real name: Sambuca
(she kept herself to herself really so didn't get many names)
Parents old cat was called many things, most notably
"Mmmffh yrrr geedddoffff arrggghh you little git"
He had a habit of curling up on my face while I was asleep. He would be very unhappy when I woke up.
I expected much reference to poo in the Eric names. I confess to being disappointed.
Kizzie used to sleep on my pillow above my head and massage my scalp gently (!) with her claws. Until one night when she stretched out her paw and sunk her claw into my eyelid. She's not allowed in the bedroom at all any more.
Does Pookie count? And what about Mrs Dungdunghead, stinker, etc.
Oh, they also get called 'tigerface' and 'pantherface' respectively. And 'you spiteful old cow' and 'you frickin' useless cat'.
Milly now wants to add something to the thread by trampling on my laptop.
The voice of the paw...
We have a dog
Kennel Club name : Brymarden Conspiracy by Megalex
Real Name: Connor
Names used by my wife:
My Darling boy
Names used by me:
Names he actually recognises:
Bedtime (cos that's when he gets a biscuit)
> We have a dog
> > Your dog
> Hey! That's the name of the dog that lives in our house,too. Well it must be, 'cos we both call him that.
Also answers to BBD (Big Black Dog) and Sh**wit.
Start your own thread matey...cats only!!
What the ....?
How the ....?
Where the ....?
Our neighbours cat comes into our house every day.
Her collar says CHELSEA which is what we've always called her.
Turns out Chelsea was her predessor and she just wears the dead cat's collar (tightwad neighbours).
Cat is really called CRYSTAL but we call her Chelsea still because it is the better of two bad names.
Official name is Nea, she's the apple of my eye and accordingly spoilt and stroppy.
Babycat (yes I'm embarrassed about this one)
I briefly had a feral kitten with a lot of personality and no manners, which went walkabout. Offical name: Talisker
Poopy Cat (no need to elaborate)
doesn't have any!
Ooh ya F*cker
F*ck sake Charly what is WRONG with you?
JaJa (gets a swollen lip when he's got fleas)
We love him to bits, he's a wrong un!
dennis you depressed c**t (bit of a mopey cat)
Official Moniker: The Oaf
Real name: Flint
Pogo (my current most used)
Pogo dog stick
Dumb ass fool dog
Old name (he's 'second hand'): Benjy
Toby and Heidi.
Both get called 'Cat' more often than not and if either of them does something evil they get called 'snakefood'.
Official name: Isambard Kingdom Brunel (named by someone else!)
> Our neighbours cat comes into our house every day.
> Her collar says CHELSEA which is what we've always called her.
> Turns out Chelsea was her predessor and she just wears the dead cat's collar (tightwad neighbours).
> Cat is really called CRYSTAL but we call her Chelsea still because it is the better of two bad names.
Chelsea and Crystal?? Do you live in Essex by any chance?
ginger cats rule!!
I don't have a cat, but I call the one that comes into my garden and sh1ts 'Cooking Fat'. As in "that cooking fat is back in the bloody garden, where's my gun".
Tickle - Real name
Called, Tickle-puss, Stupid, Oi You, T, cat.
What she responds to - Breakfast!
This made me chuckle!
extra names: ginger
maxaria (he meows, a lot)
will you bloody keep still (while im trying to use the laptop and your sitting on my chest and keeps bloody squirming and getting in the way so i cant see the screen)
real name: Jess
Nevis the cat aka the Ginger ninja
Currently on a Bosman with Marc C
ginger ninja....love it!
I used to live with a girl with a cat called Bumbsk.
However most of the time I used to call it 'Stop bl00dy purring at me you evil, bollick licking, fur shedding, preening dollop of hateful flesh'
Mainly 'cos I hate cats
Zelda aka Mrs Cat and Dustbin
Pancake aka Mr Cat, Oi Bonkers!, Loon
BadCat (although this is also the name we gave the feral cat that terrorises all the mogies on our street, there is another called EvilCat)
We don't have one, but next door's is known as Cooking Fat
At least that's what I call it when there are any small kids within earshot!
I had two cats called Freddie and Freda, both were on occaisons called Cookin Fat :-)
All cats have at least three names:
"The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover—
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name. "
T S Eliot
Our cat is:
That ********* animal
Your ******* cat (has gone and slaughtered xyz/is ontop of the kitchen cupboards again)
Our dog is:
Kenmiltree Trojan (never)
Mac (mostly) and variously
Thanks for that!
So, that's what he is meditating on...i thought he was just dreaming of his next piece of fresh tuna :)
> All cats have at least three names:
> "The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
> It isn't just one of your holiday games;
> You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
> When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
> First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
> Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
> Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
> All of them sensible everyday names.
> There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
> Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
> Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter—
> But all of them sensible everyday names.
> But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
> A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
> Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular,
> Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
> Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
> Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
> Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
> Names that never belong to more than one cat.
> But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
> And that is the name that you never will guess;
> The name that no human research can discover—
> But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
> When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
> The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
> His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
> Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
> His ineffable effable
> Deep and inscrutable singular Name. "
> T S Eliot
So the third one's 'Cooking Fat' then?
I did not appreciate being used as an ice climbing wall.
Hoorah, another Eric!
got two cats:
maddy aka - slinky malinky
alfie aka - snow leopard
Official 1: Oreo
Official 2: Nutter Butter
Nutty Butty Woo Woo
Nutty Butt Pooh Pops
(She really gets it bad :)
Nick names used for either-
Real name Kipper, who is a jet black cat.
Oi C*nt (normally when he's biting or scratching something that hurts)
Awwwwwwwww (makes him roll on his back and present his belly for attention)
poooooos poooos pooos psss
Kipper bling (this is the neighbours name for him due to his silver collar)
Big ginger freak
Piss off ginge! (when he jumps on my head in the night)
"The cat" or officially "Max"
I forgot gingey whingey
> "The cat" or officially "Max"
would you say you were generally lacking in imagination? ;)
Mwiss mwiss (more of a calling noise)
She's also the only cat I've ever had that comes back when whilstled to.
Claw and Darkness are superb names for cats...if it reflects their evil personalities?!
I once had a spanish girlfriend with a cat called 'Millunas'....which translates as '1000 claws'
Cool name :)
However, due to persistent furniture scratching, her mother had the poor thing declawed at the front.
I then called him 'Quinientosunas'...500 claws :)
> We don't have one, but next door's is known as Cooking Fat
Ahhh, the old ones are the best. Taken from an original Carry on film.
We used to have two almost identical brothers - Misty and Sparky apparently - who always got called cat and cat because we couldn't easily tell them apart. We lost Misty and got two other cats so now cat is big cat and the other two (ying and yang officially) are white cat and black cat.
Not such emmotive names as a cat I had years ago which was Piss Pot.
Jake and Elwood Blues (they're on a mission from someone, if not god).
Familiarly Jakus and Ells.
Once had cats born by caesarian section - Macduff and Gloucester for the literary-minded out there.
> Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey—
Wonder if the whiskery stand up comedian realises the poetic feline heritage of his name.
One of mine answers to bitchpiss
Another gets called fluffball and bawbag but his real name is spoon.
Spoon - nice name! How come?
He is stupid but beautiful :-)
Official Name: Fluffy-Rose
Although actually we seem to have solved the problem now so don't use the names so much.
Sounds like a good enough reason to me! I need another cat so I can call it Spoon. Mr TC says two cats is quite enough, so we'll have to get a dog instead.
Mr H Cat
depending on what it is doing.
Real name: Danny
Called: Ginger, Ginger filth, Ginger Cat
Real name: Jess
Called: Fat Cat
However she is mostly referred to as Slug.
Another ginger officially Sampson
Current names include:
> Hoorah, another Eric!
He was called Eric because it was an inappropriate plain name for the cutest little bundle of fluff (as chosen by late teenage kids).
It is also a deeply unsuitable name for the cold-eyed, sociopathic, psychopathic feline torturer and assassin that he grew to be. THere was another dismantled pigeon in the kitchen last night, with bits of it on top of the kitchen cupboards. I wouldn't care to say if it was alive or dead when he bundled it through the cat flap.
Still, at least he's the right gender. My Eric was named after the heroic viking Eric the Red. She is neither heroic nor vikinglike.
Family cat was called Butch. He used to come in from the rain and risk electrocution and vaporisation by by drying out ontop of the lounge telly.
Well hard. He used to then sit upright facing into room and stare you out as you were watching the box. Most disconcerting.
Student house cat was a very maingy affair. His nick-name was smeg, probably due to his unsavory courtship habits in our back yard, as well as latching on fast to the carpet and curtains when it was time to boot him out.
lead cat (he weights a ton)
> Sounds like a good enough reason to me! I need another cat so I can call it Spoon. Mr TC says two cats is quite enough, so we'll have to get a dog instead.
Mr TC is quite right.
Try to avoid women with more than two cats is one of the best pieces of advice i have had in life :)
> Mr TC is quite right.
> Try to avoid women with more than two cats is one of the best pieces of advice i have had in life :)
Is that some sort of euphemism for "she's only allowed one pet cat"?
> big puss
> lead cat (he weights a ton)
> fluffy nuts
> fat face
lead cat i like very much :)
I lost my last cat to my ex...but then he was hers to start with i guess. Still miss him though
We used to get visits from a neighbours cat, Roo (a flirt, used to spend time in at least 3 peoples houses on our street, and no, we werent feeding her. She was just optimising sunbeam sunbathing opportunities/snooping/laying claim/hatching a plan of world domination or something).
Her name somehow morphed into Roofapopoulis, said with a greek accent. I have no idea why.
brucee big balls
My cat is called Cordelia... We thought she was a 'he' at first and since it was from Moss Side we thought we would call it Cordell. Changed it when we found out she was a 'she'!
Stinky little wench. (Her shit stinks)
Shit bag (when she pukes)
Evil shit (when she gives you dead eyes for no reason)
Fluff bag (when she sheds)
Soon to become "Get out of that bloody tree and stop chewing the fairy lights"!
I have 2 cats - Opheila and Jake.
Fat rat and Skinny rat.
Marleymarleymarleymarleymarley (in Austin Powers 'moley' styleee)
Black & White cat
Noo noo mgoo
Ex cats real name: Samson
also known as
master of the universe
two brain cells (one for food, one for sleep)
Real name Hendrix,
Stupid little shite
I much prefer dogs, but this geezer sounds ok :-)
I follow him (Tom Cox, or more specifically Under the Paw) on facebook because he shares the *best* cat pictures, and I'm a massive loser who likes that sort of thing. Of his cats, the Bear and Ralph are my favourites.
I presume you 'like' the cat-a-day page on FB? There's some crackers on there
Oo, I haven't found that one. Yet.
>>> Cat's don't know their names anyway so what's the point?
They do, it's just that they don't let you know that...
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