UKC

How do I get over the embarrassment of being a beginner? I went to my local climbing gym twice this week. Both times it was packed and both times I left after about 15 minutes because I was struggling on V0-V1 boulders with people who are much better than me all around. I feel like everyone is silently judging me.

They won't be judging you.

But I'd say it's way more fun if you can go with a few mates of a similar standard.

Nobody is just judging you. They're too wrapped up in their own climbing (and the fact that they're not climbing v7 like "everyone", well everyone on YouTube does)

The reason the gym has some VB/V0 and V1 there is because that's what many people need, especially when they start out but sometimes a bit longer than they'd care to admit (or recovering from injury and getting back into it)

And.. yes it's supposed to be a struggle sometimes, accepting and enjoying the challenge of a struggle, is a big aspect of it for many people after you've got into it more.

Just go there and enjoy yourself. FK other people 😉 the majority of us have been where you are now.

a) They aren't judging you

b) Go when it's quieter

c) Psych is often the common denominator between everyone at the gym -- you getting psyched going from v0 to v1 is the same as someone else getting psyched going from v10 to v11.  Get psyched, and climb for yourself.

Just go climb, the best climbers are those having the most fun. We climb because we enjoy it, grade is irrelevant in the big scheme of things. 

In Dave Mac's book '9 out of 10 climbers make the same mistakes', one of the mistakes he says most climbers make (In my experience he is right) is being scared of being seen to fail by their peers. So even very capable climbers will avoid climbing styles (or entire disciplines, like 'modern' bouldering or long pumpy sport climbs) that are not their strength, will avoid routes of a lower grade than their perceived (or projected) ability that they feel they will not succeed on, will avoid working on their weaknesses so that they are not perceived in their scene/gym/group as being below a certain level or ability, and so over time will develop big blind spots and weaknesses that they are carefully avoiding exposing in public for fear of the way they are perceived. Overcoming this can involve forcing yourself to fail in front of others so that you learn not to be scared of being seen to fail, and thus never avoid spending time doing things you are not already good at.

As a beginner (and for me this advice applies to most intermediate climbers too, maybe even more so than beginners) the quicker you can learn to ignore other peoples opinions about you and enjoy the sheer intuitive joy of physical puzzle solving and challenge, the quicker you can free your mind from the heavy weight of worrying about other people's perceptions about success and failure, what it means to be 'good' or 'strong'. The bonus of not giving a frigg, as above poster advises (I advise it too) is that you wont be afraid to fail and in the long run will actually become better.

As an aside, in my experience advanced climbers truly do not care about beginners, they have seen it all before and fail constantly, but they can enjoy the energy of positive and curious beginners. Those who look down on beginners are usually intermediate climbers who are projecting their own anxieties downwards. What they really need to do is to forget their achievements and think of themselves as beginners again, and learn again to fail in front of others.

Have realistic expectations as a beginner - you're supposed to struggle on 'easy' problems! The more you do it, the better you'll become and you can move on to slightly harder ones step by step. Honestly, no-one is judging you, we've all been there. Just don't expect to improve overnight like many beginners do, you've got to put in the hours, weeks, months and years.

Not sure where you live, and realise you might not have many choices as to which wall(s) to go to, but some are definitely more beginner friendly than others. So, if you can, try a variety of walls to see which you feel most comfortable at

Look for organised socials or improvement courses at your local wall. It's so much nicer to be climbing with others in a similar situation so you can trade beta and encourage one another. I've been to a lot of the women's ones but there should be mixed gender ones too. 

And I think we often forget that climbing a V0 is still something not everyone can do. I'm now disabled and if I can ever get back to climbing, I'll be on the VBs, down climbing, freaking out a metre from the ground, with a spotter. There is always someone worse than you and I'm happy to be that person if it helps  

We all try.  We all fail.  Embracing failure is the only way to get better (at anything).

The only people who will judge you are those who are still self-conscious of their own failure.  But climbing is humbling, and most of us shed that pretty quickly.

You'd worry a whole lot less about what other people think about you if you knew how little they do. 

Not only climbers - I think it's probably fair to say that the fear of failure (and fear of embarrassment) is the single biggest obstacle for adults trying to learn new skills in just about every other sport/hobby/whatever as well.

I see what you mean there, but I'd say that 'those who look down on beginners' are largely imaginary and don't actually exist at all.  People are dicks sometimes to be sure, but as others have said above the perception that you're being 'judged' by more experienced and stronger climbers at the wall is much more likely to be a bit of a paranoid illusion most of the time.

More in reply to the OP here..
Queen's advice about joining an organised group at the wall is good if they run a suitable course.  (They're free with the price of entry at most of the walls around here.)  The trick is to stick at it until you're not a beginner any more and to have fun in the meantime, and joining an organised introductory or improvers group is certainly a good way to do that.

The up-side of being a beginner, so long as you're not afraid to try things and fail sometimes, is that progress tends to be pretty rapid.  Gains will never come this quickly and easily again, so it's a real shame if self-consciousness prevents you from enjoying that!

I’ve spent numerous evenings talking to climbers of infinitely more talent and experience than me. Whilst I may have felt inferior, it was clearly evident they didn’t give a toss. In fact, exactly the opposite. They were supportive and interested in my stories. They were most definitely not judgemental. 

As others have said, if you do meet someone who judges you F them. We’ve all been there “all the gear and no idea”.

Enjoy the journey. One day you’ll look back and be glad you invested in yourself and made all the amazing memories you made.

I am not a beginner and I am constantly outboldered by those better than me. When you are a beginner you are meant to fail. It's how you learn. Even when not a beginner you have to keep tryingn/be prepared to risk failure to learn. Identify weaknesses. Learn from them. My experience is that.boulderers are a friendly bunch. Little judgement goes on and we all started somewhere.

Lots of good advice.

Don't worry - no-one else does. Anyone who climbs knows 'there's always a faster gun in the West'. 

Avoid packed times

Do a beginner's class - everyone will be in the same boat, you'll get lots of support and hopefully improve (and enjoy the road to improvement even more)

Spot on!

If you are struggling on a V0, whether you are a beginner or an old-hand, almost everyone will just be happy to see someone game for giving it a go.

My impression is that the only climbers who genuinely do get a bit of judgmental scrutiny are the world famous utterly awesome climbers. I was extremely impressed by how, despite that, Adam Ondra seemed totally ease floundering in front of dozens of onlookers on Hubble which is a grade he regularly flashes. He seemed to be having fun and psyched by how hard it was for him.

What they said. Plus:

Slow down and do some people-watching. 

Assuming you're more-or-less the same design of human as the rest of us, you'll need time between efforts for your fingers and/or lungs to recover. (Hang on as tight as you need to, not as tight as you possibly can. Climb like a t-rex using balance and the relatively vast muscles in your legs rather than your forearms... those two statements alone have got four hours of training value in them to unpack...) 

Everyone else also needs time. They will be standing around too, encouraging their mates or shaking out or avoiding their spouse for ninety minutes or whatever. 

Use the time to watch how others tackle the problem you were trying. Climbers are largely different shapes and sizes, so you can always learn something, even if what you learn is "I am too short/tall/inflexible/weak/clumsy footwork to use that approach." 

Well your footwork can improve really fast. And if you are short, or tall, watch people who are like you but also the opposite from you, because you'll learn something useful in each case. 

Use some social skills obviously. People can tell if you're leering. Watching for technique is totally legit, expected, nobody should be uncomfortable with it and explicitly acknowledging "thanks, that was cool to see, I'll try it that way now and see how I get on" or something can break some ice, ice which is most likely only on your side anyway. 

Stick at it - go back to a route after trying something else. Trying similar standards or styles. If you can, going at roughly the same time of the week. Good things will happen. Someone will end up giggling with you at a spectacular fail - yours or theirs. Someone will give you clues. Sometimes that person will be a patronising show-off who you don't need around for more than a few minutes, but they may have nice friends, and/or they may turn into a lifelong climbing pal. If you stick at it you'll see the same folks and they'll see you and it gets more comfortable. 

Chat to/nod at the staff at the desk. Not when they're busy or when they're trying to get their own stuff done. Ask them or look at the introductions board to find other lonely folks. 

Climbing more than anything else I know of is a sport where people want you to succeed, and your success doesn't take away from theirs. Find a short one, a tall one, a weak one and an inflexible one to climb with so you can laugh at each other and help each other's weaknesses. It's a sport full of low social skills folk who don't mind grunting at you and ignoring you, but the other ones are keen to welcome and help you, just a bit shy to know how. Be welcome and find your way. 

Y

Great post. Those intermediate climbers who look down on others are only a small minority but, sadly, despite Depsoup's claims, they certainly do exist (especially those with attitudes about larger climbers)

A few things to add for the OP: practice downclimbing, as those new to climbing are more at risk of injury in a fall (mainly from tensing up or reaching out); for similar reasons don't be badgered into going for things, early on, that  you are uncomfortable with (at least until falling in a controlled relaxed way becomes normal); if you learn to ignore worries about what others think, and accept the wonderful in climbing, it can quickly become addictive...so don't forget the importance of active rest... and learn to warm up first and stretch afterwards; buy or hire climbing shoes that are snug but don't hurt your feet.

I look at complete beginners at the bouldering wall.

When I do I think something along the lines of "Wow, that's awesome, they are giving it a go.  I bet they are finding it hard, but I hope they are enjoying themselves and stick as it as this is a cool, rewarding journey that will pay back in heaps as they get better.  I wonder if it would be too patronising to offer some beta (tips)?"

Then I pull on to my project, fail and get self conscious, as a wiry youth does it without using their feet.

People do care, but in a good way.  If they judge they are not even worth a second thought.

Just climb.

The only time a beginner climber gets judged is when they inexplicably feel the need to offer advice/beta to a woman (who is inevitably a better climber than them).

As long as you’re not doing that don’t worry 😉 

I made no "claims" that they don't exist at all, I said they're largely imaginary.  And feck me Offwidth, even on this thread you can't help looking to provoke an argument?

As the old saying goes: 'Methinks the lady doth protest too much'

(my bold)

So no then, even on this thread you can't resist looking to provoke a tiresome pedantic and wholly unnecessary argument.  And I couldn't resist biting - I know, what a fecking numpty!

Somewhat beside the point now, but what I actually meant was that the judgemental pricks are both imaginary and non-existent to a large extent.  But you're quite right, I phrased it badly so you win, well done.

This isn’t about point scoring forum games: some real nice people I know were unlucky and got hurt by the way they were treated by that small minority of idiots at walls or in training.

We all word things badly from time to time (me maybe more than most).