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So speaking to a friend who works around the corner from me today,
he was a bit pissed off cos someone had eaten his lunch from the works fridge!
So what ideas are there to deter the thief or catch him red handed?
I reckon either laxatives or food colouring to catch him.
Chili extract to deter him and maybe catch him.
Ideas are welcome.
he was a bit pissed off cos someone had eaten his lunch from the works fridge!
So what ideas are there to deter the thief or catch him red handed?
I reckon either laxatives or food colouring to catch him.
Chili extract to deter him and maybe catch him.
Ideas are welcome.
In reply to Stash: Food colouring is a brilliant idea! Maybe hire a private eye
If you think it's someone form junior / middle management you could make up some turd sandwiches.
But the secret is them to emblazon them with a BMW emblem, so they go for them without even thinking.
But the secret is them to emblazon them with a BMW emblem, so they go for them without even thinking.
In reply to Stash: Hide in the fridge and slap him as soon as he opens the door
In reply to Stash:
I worked on a site in York a few years back. Someone kept drinking my lemonade in the canteen until I pissed in the bottle. Needless to say the culprit soon owned up calling me a dirty bastard only to be ridiculed by the rest of the guys in the canteen. It never happened again.
As for food being stolen, I think I'd go with the pube sandwich.
I worked on a site in York a few years back. Someone kept drinking my lemonade in the canteen until I pissed in the bottle. Needless to say the culprit soon owned up calling me a dirty bastard only to be ridiculed by the rest of the guys in the canteen. It never happened again.
As for food being stolen, I think I'd go with the pube sandwich.
In reply to Trangia: Make sure you clingfilm the bogs first
In reply to Stash:
shampoo/soap as a sauce inside them
the person with bubbles around their mouth is your theif
shampoo/soap as a sauce inside them
the person with bubbles around their mouth is your theif
In reply to Stash:
A classic one from uni days was to put a note in the fridge stating one of the items in the fridge has been spiked with laxitives/pubes .... So unless you want to play russian rulette with you bowels don't steal my food. You don't acytually have to spike anything just the threat is good enough.
A classic one from uni days was to put a note in the fridge stating one of the items in the fridge has been spiked with laxitives/pubes .... So unless you want to play russian rulette with you bowels don't steal my food. You don't acytually have to spike anything just the threat is good enough.
In reply to Stash:
Laxative would be a bad idea, as it would definately be considered to be "administering a noxious substance". Turds and pubes probably come under the same law.
http://www.statutelaw.gov.uk/content.aspx?activeTextDocId=1043854
See section 24.
A well constructed cheese & ludicrously strong chilli sauce sandwich would probably be deniable though.
Laxative would be a bad idea, as it would definately be considered to be "administering a noxious substance". Turds and pubes probably come under the same law.
http://www.statutelaw.gov.uk/content.aspx?activeTextDocId=1043854
See section 24.
A well constructed cheese & ludicrously strong chilli sauce sandwich would probably be deniable though.
In reply to Stash: I know the old dental disclosing tablets used to stain wee red ? Also if you know somene who works on a surgical ward i believe the brand name is "pico-lax" this is an industrial bowel mover.... stand well back ;0)
In reply to davidbeynon:
Putting it on your own sandwich is not actually enticing someone else to eat it.
Putting it on your own sandwich is not actually enticing someone else to eat it.
In reply to Stash:
Create your own sandwich 'paste', eat plenty of asparagus to help disguise the smell.
Create your own sandwich 'paste', eat plenty of asparagus to help disguise the smell.
In reply to Tom Valentine:
true, but i bet you could get done if something bad happened to someone who ate one of your special sandwiches.
Wheres a lawyer when you need one?
Stealing food i bet!
true, but i bet you could get done if something bad happened to someone who ate one of your special sandwiches.
Wheres a lawyer when you need one?
Stealing food i bet!
In reply to Stash:
Some of this in the food http://www.hot-headz.com/hot-sauce/Blair_s_Jersey_Death-660-0.html?gclid=CN...
You know who the culprit is straight away
Some of this in the food http://www.hot-headz.com/hot-sauce/Blair_s_Jersey_Death-660-0.html?gclid=CN...
You know who the culprit is straight away
In reply to Stash:
A couple of LSD tabs or some magic mushrooms should do the trick. Unless you work on the ropes, driving buses or similar...
A couple of LSD tabs or some magic mushrooms should do the trick. Unless you work on the ropes, driving buses or similar...
In reply to Tom Valentine:
I'm no lawyer, but I suspect that having a reasonable expectation that someone was going to eat it would be enough.
I'm no lawyer, but I suspect that having a reasonable expectation that someone was going to eat it would be enough.
In reply to Stash:
Laxatives AND food colouring. And LSD.
A fair deterrent.
> So speaking to a friend who works around the corner from me today,
> he was a bit pissed off cos someone had eaten his lunch from the works fridge!
>
> So what ideas are there to deter the thief or catch him red handed?
>
> I reckon either laxatives or food colouring to catch him.
> he was a bit pissed off cos someone had eaten his lunch from the works fridge!
>
> So what ideas are there to deter the thief or catch him red handed?
>
> I reckon either laxatives or food colouring to catch him.
Laxatives AND food colouring. And LSD.
A fair deterrent.
In reply to davidbeynon:
Unless you had a proven record of eating turd sandwiches...
> (In reply to Stash)
>
> Laxative would be a bad idea, as it would definately be considered to be "administering a noxious substance". Turds and pubes probably come under the same law.
>
> Laxative would be a bad idea, as it would definately be considered to be "administering a noxious substance". Turds and pubes probably come under the same law.
Unless you had a proven record of eating turd sandwiches...
In reply to Steve John B:
And wasps. You forgot the wasps.
Hallucinating wasps with the runs.
> (In reply to Stash)
> [...]
>
> Laxatives AND food colouring. And LSD.
>
> A fair deterrent.
> [...]
>
> Laxatives AND food colouring. And LSD.
>
> A fair deterrent.
And wasps. You forgot the wasps.
Hallucinating wasps with the runs.
In reply to Steve John B:
Everyone needs a hobby.
> Unless you had a proven record of eating turd sandwiches...
Everyone needs a hobby.
In reply to davidbeynon:
Well it's cheaper than an iPad I suppose
> (In reply to Steve John B)
>>
> Everyone needs a hobby.
> Everyone needs a hobby.
Well it's cheaper than an iPad I suppose
In reply to davidbeynon:
Is it reasonable to expect someone to steal food from you?
Is it reasonable to expect someone to steal food from you?
In reply to Stash:
see-through Tupperware sandwich box with tempting biscuits and butties and a rape alarm inside activated by the lid opening
see-through Tupperware sandwich box with tempting biscuits and butties and a rape alarm inside activated by the lid opening
In reply to Tom Valentine:
Of course not, but given that someone is stealing food then it is entirely reasonable to expect that the laxative sandwich you stashed in the fridge will be eaten.
Personally I would fire anyone I caught stealing from colleagues, but it probably wouldn't be possible. I remember reading about a study a while ago that suggested that it tended to be higher management who were most likely to nick stuff as the job tended to come with a sense of entitlement.
Of course not, but given that someone is stealing food then it is entirely reasonable to expect that the laxative sandwich you stashed in the fridge will be eaten.
Personally I would fire anyone I caught stealing from colleagues, but it probably wouldn't be possible. I remember reading about a study a while ago that suggested that it tended to be higher management who were most likely to nick stuff as the job tended to come with a sense of entitlement.
In reply to davidbeynon:
Yes, in reality if you thought there was a reasonable expectation it would be stolen, you wouldn't keep your snap in that fridge in the first place, would you?
As to sacking them, milk mice seem to be the most common mammals in the UK.
Yes, in reality if you thought there was a reasonable expectation it would be stolen, you wouldn't keep your snap in that fridge in the first place, would you?
As to sacking them, milk mice seem to be the most common mammals in the UK.
In reply to davidbeynon:
How about a very lightly hard boiled egg with food coloring injected into a very runny yolk. One chomp and the culprit is covered in highly colored goo
How about a very lightly hard boiled egg with food coloring injected into a very runny yolk. One chomp and the culprit is covered in highly colored goo
In reply to davidbeynon:
lol - yea, screaming alarm and a cloud of pepper spray. Could well spoil their appetite
lol - yea, screaming alarm and a cloud of pepper spray. Could well spoil their appetite
In reply to Stash:
If you add anything to the food which is obviously going to harm the person who eats it then you could end up in a difficult legal position. If you add anything make sure it is something that you could defend adding for personal use:
- An industrial quantity of hot sauce is ok as you just say you like chillis (you can get a product called Satan's Sh1t which is about half as hot as police pepper spray but is sold as a condiment)
- A mate resorted to a spot of 'self love' into a mayo pot in revenge for a particularly troublesome housemate. It would probably be a bit illegal though
If you add anything to the food which is obviously going to harm the person who eats it then you could end up in a difficult legal position. If you add anything make sure it is something that you could defend adding for personal use:
- An industrial quantity of hot sauce is ok as you just say you like chillis (you can get a product called Satan's Sh1t which is about half as hot as police pepper spray but is sold as a condiment)
- A mate resorted to a spot of 'self love' into a mayo pot in revenge for a particularly troublesome housemate. It would probably be a bit illegal though
In reply to Tom Valentine:
Milk stealers are best dealt with by putting a half empty carton in the fridge with your name on. Add some lemon juice and see the face of someone who you suspect of stealing it.
Milk stealers are best dealt with by putting a half empty carton in the fridge with your name on. Add some lemon juice and see the face of someone who you suspect of stealing it.
In reply to Stash:
When one of my brothers was at music college, somebody kept stealing a person's bread, so he pee'd in the bread bag and the stealing stopped.
If I was your friend i'd maybe not keep the sandwich in the fridge and leave a note saying why, so the food stealer would know why and other people would too.
Create an atmosphere of suspiscion for the food stealer...()
Cheers
Tim
When one of my brothers was at music college, somebody kept stealing a person's bread, so he pee'd in the bread bag and the stealing stopped.
If I was your friend i'd maybe not keep the sandwich in the fridge and leave a note saying why, so the food stealer would know why and other people would too.
Create an atmosphere of suspiscion for the food stealer...()
Cheers
Tim
In reply to Stash:
A few slivers of Dorset Naga hidden in the centre of the sarnie would be a laugh.
A few slivers of Dorset Naga hidden in the centre of the sarnie would be a laugh.
In reply to Stash:
Kill his parents and then mince them. Use the minced meat to make a chilli con carne and then put that in the fridge. Then it's just a matter of watching him eat his parents.
It worked for Cartman.
Kill his parents and then mince them. Use the minced meat to make a chilli con carne and then put that in the fridge. Then it's just a matter of watching him eat his parents.
It worked for Cartman.
In reply to muppetfilter:
excellent excellent idea!
lace the stuff with vanilla / rum/aparagus/violoet flavouring
> (In reply to Stash) I know the old dental disclosing tablets used to stain wee red ? Also if you know somene who works on a surgical ward i believe the brand name is "pico-lax" this is an industrial bowel mover.... stand well back ;0)
excellent excellent idea!
lace the stuff with vanilla / rum/aparagus/violoet flavouring
In reply to tony4433: excellent!
I go for the Naga chilli vote! Not something you can get arrested and you can deny it was any sort of assult unless like me you like a sandwich to burn the skin off your mouth.
In reply to Stash:
You need some Bitrex.
http://www.bitrex.com/
It is essentially industrial strength ear wax used to stop people consuming toxic stuff.
Bitrex itself is entirely safe.
The smallest drum they sell it in is 22 litres so this may not be all that practical.
You need some Bitrex.
http://www.bitrex.com/
It is essentially industrial strength ear wax used to stop people consuming toxic stuff.
Bitrex itself is entirely safe.
The smallest drum they sell it in is 22 litres so this may not be all that practical.
In reply to Stash: I would go for this stuff. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Syrup_of_ipecac
I have seen some videos on the net... you will know who's stealing.
Jim
I have seen some videos on the net... you will know who's stealing.
Jim
In reply to thin bob: brilliant! love the "Park on my privates" note...
In reply to Stash:
in regards to OP could it simply be mistaken identify of cling film??
if it was a one of that is??
in regards to OP could it simply be mistaken identify of cling film??
if it was a one of that is??
Post-it telling people that you lick your food
In reply to hetaher:
In today's literacy climate, that would be interpreted as you recommending your food to others...
> Post-it telling people that you lick your food
In today's literacy climate, that would be interpreted as you recommending your food to others...
In reply to Stash:
"and i spat on it, so i dont suggest you eat it."
- rick to vivian, the young ones.
anyone else remember that?
and i do like the LSD idea, tho i think ketamine would have a more immediate effect.
"and i spat on it, so i dont suggest you eat it."
- rick to vivian, the young ones.
anyone else remember that?
and i do like the LSD idea, tho i think ketamine would have a more immediate effect.
In reply to Reach>Talent:
Illegal or not, Marc Almond would have lapped it up.
Illegal or not, Marc Almond would have lapped it up.
In reply to thin bob:> http://www.passiveaggressivenotes.com/
those are brilliant! I'm a bit worried that a lot of the emails i send at work are along those lines, maybe i should get out more.
those are brilliant! I'm a bit worried that a lot of the emails i send at work are along those lines, maybe i should get out more.
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