UKC

BIFF - Beastmaker International Footless Festival Report

For a long time here at Beastmaker we have discussed how much fun it could be to run an entirely footless climbing comp. There was a video floating around the internet a while ago of a French footless comp which looked like a load of fun and ever since seeing that we have pondered the idea from time to time. Each time we decided it was a stupid idea. Who'd want to do a footless comp, let along come and watch it?

Eventually we took the plunge and mentioned the idea to the Climbing Works. They jumped on board with more vigor than we ever expected and all of a sudden we had a date set.

The BIFF in action, 153 kb
The BIFF in action
© Ned Feehally

The format was simple. A load of boulder problems, a pull up comp, a deadhang comp and a couple of other "problems" thrown into the mix for good measure. ALL climbed without feet. Competitors could try anything in any order with an unlimited number of attempts. The relaxed format meant the "climbers" could just get on with trying their hardest without worrying about falling off and as a result people were throwing themselves at the problems like lemmings off a cliff - impressive and daft in equal measure. The crowd got to see some real treats, both in terms of "oh my god he's defying gravity" and "look at that plonker opening and downing a can of Stellar mid problem" not to mention "there's Edmund Mallory in full 1950's Everest gear, check out his finger strength!".

The turn out for the competition blew us away. About 50 competitors and 200 spectators piled in to the wall to watch some ridiculous feats of strength, laugh at some ridiculous outfits and drink a ridiculous amount of beer.

photo
Strong climbers and strong hair from the judges
© Dom Worrall

All proceeds from the evening (about £800) went straight to Climbers Against Cancer. We felt like we could get away with running such a stupid event if we just fobbed it off as a charity find raiser, which on reflection worked quite well!

As the long evening drew to a close and bodies were being scraped off the floor there was still time for one more (hastily organised) event. Featuring the never-seen-before never-to-be-seen-again highball deadhang death match, the grand final was a sight to behold.

Competitors hung opposite each other, and armed with a foam noodle and failing limbs they battled it out in a last man/woman hanging contest. Fortunately no one was injured or killed, despite many near misses and one particularly worrying moment. You'll have to watch the video to see for yourselves...

Michaela Tracy winning the BIFF, 201 kb
Michaela Tracy winning the BIFF
© Dom Worrall

Thanks to everybody that attended. Be it to watch, laugh, drink, show off, impress girls, impress boys, dress ridiculously, hang out, hang on, go on the pull (up), help out, catch up, eat pizza, look cool, make friends, shout, etc. We couldn't have done it without you.

A huge thanks also has to go to the Climbing Works - not only did they allow this event to be run (seemingly at the risk of having their lovely climbing centre closed down for good) but they really got on board to turn a stupid, whimsical idea into a functional but also totally stupid event.

photo
Tom Randall in unusual attire at the BIFF
© Dom Worrall

We certainly had a great time and we hope that you lot did too. Anyone who couldn't make it (or missed it to sit in the pub and moan about how it isn't "real climbing") - you'll be able to watch a video of the event in the coming weeks...

See you next year? Well, we will have to see about that but we do hope so.

Congratulations to the winners Michaela Tracy and Louis Parkinson.

This article originally appeared on the Beastmaker blog. Visit the post for full results.

photo
Sam Whittaker looking strong...
© Dom Worrall



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