In reply to Antigua and everyone else:
Its only fair to finally unveil my own theory on what actually happened to flight MH370.
a) As they leave Malaysian airspace the pilot to the loo. (he's going to have a fag, so he instructs the co pilot to turn off the ACARS data link incase it transmits smoke alarm data to Rolls Royce)
b) Co-pilot says good night to the ATC.
c) Co-pilot now invites a fit looking female into the cockpit (he's done this before) with the hope of getting his leg over.
d) She gets distracted with his instruments and starts to have a good fiddle with his nobs. She gets turned off, he's trying to turn them on again.
e) Pilot discovers he's had a bad curry the night before and lights another cigarette for the duration.
f) An alarm sounds in cockpit, co-pilot now distracted by the female turns the wrong switches off. (this explains the transponder switched off)
g) Build up of methane in the loo, causes minor explosion. Pilot shouts for help.
h) Co-pilot rushes to assist his captain.
i) Discovering the dishevelled state of the captain's clothing they attempt to clean it up in the sink.
j) The blonde in cockpit struggles to get dressed and whilst she's getting back inside her underwear accidentally stumbles (she's gone weak kneed don't forget) accidentally disengaging auto-pilot and plane turns west and starts to climb to 46,000 ft.
K) Below an american destroyer, picks up the plane and attempts to shoot it down. (there are a number of american electronic experts on board who are believed to be defecting to China)
Unfortunately the MH370 has now reached 45,000 ft and is out of range. The still burning missile falls to earth. (this explains the 'burning light by seen by the oil rig worker)
h. The small explosion in toilet causes minor damage to plane's fuselage, passengers asphyxiated by combination of methane and lack of oxygen.
I. As there are only two oxygen masks in the cockpit there is a minor struggle to to see who gets them. Not noticing the plane is no longer on auto pilot this struggle causes the plane to veer off course again. The captain still dazed from the effects of the curry & explosion looses out) He collapses on the floor and dies.
J. The Americans send another plane up to see whats happened and flies in front of the aircraft trying to see into the cockpit.
k. The co-pilot not wanting to be found guilty of gross negligence and his captain's murder turns the aircraft away from this aircraft entirely unseen in the dark and heads SW into the southern Indian Ocean in an attempt to dispose of witnesses.
l) The aircraft the americans sent up now flies on to the Maldives (this explains the 'similar' looking aircraft flying low over the islands)
m) A passenger knowing there's some gold in the hold now attempts to seize the aircraft.
n) A struggle in the cockpit takes place, and the passenger takes the controls.
o) Meanwhile in down town Los Angeles a bored teenager, hacks into the planes computer system and takes over the plane and puts it into a climb.
p). In an attempt to rid the cockpit of the foul smells the passenger at the controls attempts to remove the dirty clothing from the captain and attempts to depose of it by throwing it through the small window next to the pilots seat. Unfortunately he gets sucked out by the rapid decompression.
q. Noticing the next episode of 'Stars in their Eyes' (or something) i about to start he discards the computer controls to watch TV instead.
r). With everyone on board overcome by either fumes or lack of oxygen the plane carries on climbing on automatic pilot.
s), The explosion in the toilet has damaged the wings and large portions drop into the souther Indian Ocean and these are later spotted by Satellite. The plane meanwhile is now so high it no longer needs the lift from the full wings so carries on into outer space.
t) The plane now enters the week gravitational pull of the moon, where it gently glides in the Sea of Tranquility.
u) And it is here, 250 years later where it is photographed by an undercover reporter for the 'New World Sunday Sport) whose been trawling the now old fashioned internet and accessing old forums in a bid to solve the case of the missing flight MH370. Its here where he now stumbles on the ancient UKC forum, 'Missing" - Solved at last.